Want to change kids school - better schools

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bayangel214

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I have shared legal/physical custody with my ex, about a 60/40 split (more with me/mom).

I am getting married and we are buying a house in a different school district (same County).
We chose that neighborhood because the schools are much, much better. It is known by all, including ex that current district is not good.

I'm nervous to ask/tell ex that I want to enroll kids in new school because I don't want to go to court if he disagrees. New school is about 10 miles further from his current home (he just bought a new house with worse schools than current school) and kids have always gone to school using my current address.

I need to enroll them asap at new school since numbers are already getting high.

Ex is very unpredictable. School change will not impact his time with the children.
 
And your question is what...???

It's doubtful that 10 miles is going to make much of a difference unless your legal custody agreement states otherwise.

Gail
 
bayangel214 said:
I have shared legal/physical custody with my ex, about a 60/40 split (more with me/mom).

I am getting married and we are buying a house in a different school district (same County).
We chose that neighborhood because the schools are much, much better. It is known by all, including ex that current district is not good.

I'm nervous to ask/tell ex that I want to enroll kids in new school because I don't want to go to court if he disagrees. New school is about 10 miles further from his current home (he just bought a new house with worse schools than current school) and kids have always gone to school using my current address.

I need to enroll them asap at new school since numbers are already getting high.

Ex is very unpredictable. School change will not impact his time with the children.
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No problem in doing that.

It doesn't violate the distance rule, so go ahead and enroll the dears.
 
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I guess my question is if he has a big problem with the change and we have to go to court or mediation what's going to happen?

Honestly he just still scares me after all these years of being apart...
I try to do the right thing and tread softly around him but this school change is really important to me and so much better for the kids safety and academic growth.

Thank you.
 
bayangel214 said:
I guess my question is if he has a big problem with the change and we have to go to court or mediation what's going to happen?

Honestly he just still scares me after all these years of being apart...
I try to do the right thing and tread softly around him but this school change is really important to me and so much better for the kids safety and academic growth.

Thank you.
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You can't predict what others will do.

In this case, however, all he can do is screech and howl.

He may have an objection.

He doesn't have a legal basis for that objection.
 
Can't he object if he doesn't agree with me to change their school?

I was under the impression that I could not make this decision on my own since we have shared legal custody.
 
bayangel214 said:
Can't he object if he doesn't agree with me to change their school?

I was under the impression that I could not make this decision on my own since we have shared legal custody.
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Read your decree or custody order.

It should give the primary custodian the right to make decisions such as this.

If not, his objection still won't trump your wise decision.
 
Everything hinges on the custody orders. If you both share equally in physical and legal custody, then a "tie" usually means the kids stay where they are (in this case, the same school they have been going to). If one of you has sole physical custody, then that person will have the edge.

Now, dad MAY have an argument if the distance traveled presents a difficulty for him to get the kids to school on his visitation days. The fact that you are moving might also change the agreement, so be sure you have read the language of the agreement such that your move does not violate the agreement. if it states a specific address the kids will be at, then you might need to go to court or mediation to get the language modified.

If time is of the essence, then do what you have to do and then tell him about it. Give yourselves time to work through any legal issues BEFORE the next school year begins.
 
I'm in agreement. If they truly have joint LEGAL custody Mom may have a problem if Dad objects.

Mom needs to get out those court orders.

If joint legal IS the case, Dad does not necessarily have to provide a reason for his objection..the burden would be on Mom to prove why it's in the best interests of the kids.
 
Talked to dad about it last nite.
He agrees the schools are better and said he'd give his 'blessing' in a year from Fall.
He wants the kids to have one more year at current school to help with transition.

I guess I don't see what good keeping kids at inferior school for one year will do for them when both parents agree other school is superior. I want kids to start making roots in community and school they will be living in.

I believe dad saying 'they can move schools in one year' is a power thing and a way to leverage control, not what's in the kids best interest.

Distance is not an issue. Orders say both parents need to stay in county. My move is in the same county and 12 miles from current home. Dad is currently 4 miles from school and will be 16 miles from new school. My move will not affect dads visitation at all.
 
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Well, then you have a choice. You can either fight him on it, or you can stay with the plan and hope that next year he continues to agree that the kids can transfer in 2011-12.

You might consider a modification to the order in the meantime putting this plan in writing on the custody and visitation paperwork.
 
Yup, that's about what I figured out too.

I'm going to try to work with him a little longer on agreeing with me to change them for Fall 2010. Maybe I can do something (not sure what) that will make him more comfortable with the change this year.

If not, I'll have to file for a change in school and hope the judge/mediator/? will see it's in the kids best interest to change their school now and not wait an arbitrary amount of time to appease the dad.

Thank you for your help.
 
army judge said:
You can't predict what others will do.

In this case, however, all he can do is screech and howl.

He may have an objection.

He doesn't have a legal basis for that objection.
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Honestly...Time to sue the Crackerjack Co. for the "degree" you have.

'cause any REAL attorney would KNOW that the "legal basis" for an objection, would be that Mom MUST GET DAD to AGREE to the change of school. In writing.
 
BayState said:
How sad for anyone appearing in your "court". Really.
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Maybe, just maybe, you'll get to personally EXPERIENCE my kind of justice one day.


Wouldn't that be great???


You gosh darn know it would!!!!


WOW, just WOW!!!!
 
army judge said:

Maybe, just maybe, you'll get to personally EXPERIENCE my kind of justice one day.


Wouldn't that be great???


You gosh darn know it would!!!!


WOW, just WOW!!!!
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I hope not. Actually I KNOW not. I actually, if NEEDED, would appear in front of a REAL judge...Not a ...ummm..."army judge" that thinks if he makes his font REALLY BIG it must mean it's correct advice.:rolleyes:
 
And just what kind of "justice" would be meted out by you, AJ?
 
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