What to do? Paternity test needed-then visitation rights

[130munch]

My son's former girlfriend is due in March. They tried to live together but it didn't work out. Now she is angry at him for not living with her & vows that he will never see the baby - not at the birth and not anytime after that.

My son says there is a slight chance this is not his child and wants to know how he can get a paternity test done when the baby is born to first determine if it is his child.

From there he will petition the court for visition rights. He's been unemployed for the past year and just found a job last week - money is tight - can he seek visitation rights on his own or must he hire an attorney. If he hires an attorney how much money can he expect to pay? Are there any good advocate groups in IL for him? Seems like they always have free help for women for family court issues - anything out there for men?

Thanks for any advice.

 

[army judge]

There are several men's advocacy groups in Illinois. One of the first father's advocacy rights group was started in Chicago. Google some terms and they'll appear.

A paternity test is always a good idea. If she says he's the dad, he can request one. Otherwise, why bother?


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[Duranie]

First of all he needs to register for the putative fathers registrey if IL has one. It looks like they do, he needs to complete this form asap since she is due soon

http://www.putativefather.org/father_registration.aspx

He will need to establish paternity then seek visitation rights.

 

[sidearmsalpha]

In the same boat

Sorry to hijack your thread, but I may have some news to post here soon about your situation. I'm also in a similar situation only I was already out of the relationship for about 3 months when my ex contacted me to tell me she was expecting a child and claimed I was the father. I have been skeptical about being the father from the very beginning for various justifiable reasons, but I had decided to stay onboard to see it through in the event I did turn out to be the father. I have remained in constant contact with her often meeting up with her to do things together. Early on, she insisted that she did not want me to go with her to any of the prenatal appointments even though I made it clear that I really wanted to, but she has been very bad about getting back to me with regular updates after the visits. She even claimed that she did not want any financial support from me when the child is born. In speaking with female friends and family members who have been in similar situations, they all thought it was odd that she was behaving in this matter when I was showing quite clearly that I wanted to be a part of this.
She was due in the middle of January, and a few months before, I discussed with her what was going to happen when he (she knew was having a boy by this time) was born regarding my rights. She coldly admitted that she had no intentions of putting me on the birth certificate as the father, he would not be given my last name, and that she would contact me when she was already home with the baby - not when she went into labor or even when she was in the hospital! I couldn't believe what I was hearing. When I demanded to know why she was treating me like this, she claimed that she just didn't feel that her child needed a father, and she was doing what was best for the child. I think she was holding a number of petty things against me like the fact that we were no longer in a relationship and I was the one who had broke it off. She also has deep-rooted father-figure issues because she did not have a constant father-figure in her life, and I honestly believe that she thinks I won't be around long even though I say I will be and is using this against me. I grew up without a father most of my life, and I have no intentions of abandoning this child.
The baby was born a few days ago on February 15th. She did not contact me when she was admitted into the hospital the day before even though she had ample time and opportunity to contact me. I finally got ahold of her mother the next day who had her call me. She insisted that I could not see the baby until she was released from the hospital, which was today. I have tried to contact her today, but there has been no response. I am getting the feeling she may not allow me to see the baby.
I have decided to submit an application with Child Support Services to open a case against myself and hire a lawyer if the results of the paternity test are positive. I have no other recourse. I will update your thread with any new info I might have that will help you with your situation.

 

[Proserpina]

It's much more helpful if you start your own thread

 

[sidearmsalpha]

Ok. Sorry. I just signed up. I will do that.