Q. What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a demon from hell? :angryfire
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A. Another lawyer. :dgrin
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.
"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined...
A man walked into a Florida bar with his alligator and asked the bartender:
"Do you serve lawyers here?" :cool:
"Sure." :yes:
"Good. One beer for me and a lawyer for my alligator." :beer:
Did you hear that the post office had to recall it's latest stamp? :yes:
Yeah, they put pictures of lawyers on them and people didn't know which side to spit on! :confused:
On their way to a justice of the peace to get married, a couple has a fatal car accident. The couple is sitting outside heavens gate waiting on St. Peter to do the paperwork so they can enter. While waiting, they wonder if they could possibly get married in Heaven. St. Peter finally shows up and...
Five surgeons were taking a coffee break and discussing their work. "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on," said the first surgeon. "You open them up and everything inside is numbered."
"I think librarians are the easiest to operate on," said the second. "You open them up and...
A lawyer approached the presiding judge and said, "Judge, I wish to appeal my client's case on the basis of newly discovered evidence."
The judge asked, "And what is the nature of the new evidence?"
To which the lawyer answered, "Judge, I discovered that my client still has $500 left." :dgrin
Hi Theresagail,
I posted a message about my 17 yr. old son who opened a checking account a few days ago. We just returned from the bank where we were informed that it was perfectly legal to open an account to people as young as 16 and that "All the banks are doing it now." If he cannot pay...
Thank you for your reply. I didn't have time to go in today like I had planned, but yesterday when I was scouring their website to try to find out how old one had to be to open a checking account, (I had to actually click on "open an account" to get this info) an online representative told me...
Hi,
I live in California. My 17 year old son was away from home (on a visit) and opened a checking/savings account with BofA on the 15 of July. He returned home on the 25 and told me of the account. He had been using online banking to keep track of his accounts and checked them daily. When...
Hi,
My boyfriend works for a large motel chain. After working for them for a year, they gave him 40 hours of vacation time (which he has not used). After 2 years, they gave him another 40 hours (also unused). Just weeks before he hit his 3 year mark, they suddenly changed the rules stating...
An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer -- you're in the wrong place." :no:
So, the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and...
Back in early 1996 we invested $100,000 (25k, 25k, and 50k) in mutual funds with Wells Fargo Bank. We also cashed them all out within the same year. The total cash out value was $92,000 do to early withdrawal penalties. My boyfriend (John) didn't file any tax returns from about 1993 through...