Mental Health #11 - A New Beginning

Cynthia you did the right thing in not responding. And that will irritate them even more!!
Our good friend was denied UI again, so I guess we will find out if he follows up on his threat to sue.

 

I know it will probably irritate the heck out of her that I'm not responding, so I've kind of been chuckling about that to myself. I can picture her throwing a complete tantrum because I won't rise to the bait.

Her e-mail to me was interesting, when I said it reminded me of things I see from some of the posters here I realized that basically it's a form a communication that has come into play with the use of social media. It sounds like comments I read on Facebook, or comments you see on news articles that allow comments from readers. It's a very confrontational form of communication that people don't seem to have a problem using when they are hiding behind the safety of a computer/smart phone screen but if it all was being conducted either over the phone or in person, it probably wouldn't have been nearly so rude, confrontational, or accusatory.

 

People say that, and I don't disagree.

I have observed an increase in rudeness and a decline in civility for the last 30, maybe 40 odd years.

I think I began to notice the decline in politeness about 1975, or so.

Nevertheless, its declining more rapidly today.

I've been looking at items in a grocery store.
Along comes a person who utters the "magic words" to make you move, believing the utterance to be polite, "Excuse me." The person then reaches over you, or sometimes gently pushes you aside to take your place and begin the selection process of their item.

I was taught to wait your turn, silently.

Someone has taught these impolite creatures to muscle their way in, use the magic words "excuse me", and that makes it all better.

Just one example of the decline of civility, maybe even civilized society.

 

That's an interesting viewpoint about the grocery store. I guess I'm rude(although I don't reach over or push,) but I do say excuse me if someone seems to be stuck in one spot. But if I'm standing there staring and trying to decide, I don't mind if someone reaches in so they can be on their way.
I think people are much more daring via email, text or social media. I've seen some things recently on Facebook in my husbands family that I cannot even imagine people saying face-to-face. It's really quite cowardly, in my opinion, when you live 4 hours away.

 

I was taught to say "pardon me" or "excuse me" when I bumped into someone, didn't see the person, failed to hold the door, or inadvertently committed some other unintended transgression against another human being.

Life is odd today, as in bizarre.

Today "excuse me" is used to "politely" tell the other person hurry up, get outta y way, I'm in a hurry and you're not as IMPORTANT as I believe myself to be.

I never interact with these people, in fact my spidy sense tingle as they approach.
I simply MOVE myself quickly out of the way to avoid a scene.

I suffer from PTSD and my reaction wouldn't be pretty, therefore I use preemptive techniques to filter and restrain actions that would inappropriate.

I avoid crowds and large gatherings as much as I cam, often choosing to go to the grocery store at 3:00 or 4:00 AM to lessen these interactions.

When I do go with my wife, she chuckles or smiles wryly as I slowly start to move 10-20 feet away to avoid improper interactions on my part.

Sadly, life isn't a two way street.

Most people see it as their private one way street, leaving you to walk along the roadside.

 

A co-worker at the grocery recently turned her cart into the cashier lane and heard someone yelling "that bitch cut me off!" She turned to see what the fuss was about and the lady looked at her and said "yeah you bitch!." She hadn't even seen the lady who had apparently selected that cashier from a little ways off and considered it hers.

 

Yes, sadly, civility has declined over the years. My parents didn't really teach us much beyond the usual "please and thank you" but I've learned myself over time to be very polite in most situations. I guess I've always believed the old adage about catching more flies with honey than with vinegar.

(That's not to say that there aren't some times when I'd just as soon holler "get the eff out of the way!" when I'm in the grocery store, but I manage to restrain myself! )

 

When life gets to me I listen to an oldie that tends to calm me down:
..
..

..
..
That usually calms this savage beast. LOL
BTW, this song came out in 1973, just around the time I claim to have noticed the decline in civility.
I was an Army Ranger in my early years in the army.
We'd operate in small 6 to 12 man patrols, for extended times in the bush.
A very good friend of mine from Philadelphia introduced me to this song during my last tour in Nam ('73-'74).
I left a few days before July 4th in '74 never to return, and Saigon fell 30 April 1975.
An old man's memories.

 

txls, I think you should forward that person's email to her direct supervisor.

 

Why on earth would you put this on your resume? "I was terminated from my last employer for missing work due to health issues"

 

The absolute inability of people to write a resume never ceases to amaze me.

 

Only have 2 of 5 staff today. One of those was supposed to leave early. It's going to be a great day.

 

Warning: Vent Ahead:

OMG, Good Friday is NOT an official holiday and yes we DO usually work a 1/2 day. We can have a 401k Meeting in the morning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Wow, your staff should consider themselves lucky that they only have to work half a day on Good Friday. Many of us don't get it off at all. (Except for me, this year, since I'll be on vacation for the month of April!)

 

We always work all day AND we don't have a 401k, so I'm digging deep trying to find some sympathy.

 

It drives me crazy-we are a company of 12 people-yet it takes at least five suggested dates before I can get a once a year employee meeting on the schedule, and even then it's with whining and you know what....

 

Not sure if it can work with you, my friend, but in my former working life I solved that issue by arranging conference calls for the technologically challenged, and/or on-line meetings for the others.

By making that slight change we were able to achieve 100% attendance and participation.

People tend to abhor "in person" meetings, even when they are physically co-located.

 

There is no common sense anymore. If you label boxes on their tops. Then you stack those boxes on top of one another. How the frick and frack is anyone going to read the labels???