separated and pregnant with someone else baby

[fall14]

I never believed ill ever ask this question or be in this situation but here i am ...
im almost 40 and married for 9 years .After trying my all to make this marriage work and be a happy family ,i gave up 9 months ago and moved out.
5 months after i dated someone that i knew but never have a relationship with him before ...i got pregnant in my big surprise when doctors had told me and to my husband it will never happen ...{cause of me }so here im not knowing how to feel ....finally God blessed with a child but now i have to deal with all this problems ...boyfriend doesn't want to know ,he doesn't believe me and i don't really want to see him again after he ask me to do abortion ..and he moved to another state
Husband still loves me and wants me back and he doesn't want to think of divorce ...by the way i cant afford the divorce fee so im really stuck. i cant go back tough cause i know how bud it was and if i had to support him back then financially and mentally now i have to do it for 2 ..him and my baby ..h has a lot of personal problems that i can't deal or help him anymore.
I want this kid to have my last name as the father doesn't want to participate in any way ...but i don't know the low and what is going to happen ....
please if anyone has any answer for me i'll appreciated.

 

[army judge]

I never believed ill ever ask this question or be in this situation but here i am ...
im almost 40 and married for 9 years .After trying my all to make this marriage work and be a happy family ,i gave up 9 months ago and moved out.
5 months after i dated someone that i knew but never have a relationship with him before ...i got pregnant in my big surprise when doctors had told me and to my husband it will never happen ...{cause of me }so here im not knowing how to feel ....finally God blessed with a child but now i have to deal with all this problems ...boyfriend doesn't want to know ,he doesn't believe me and i don't really want to see him again after he ask me to do abortion ..and he moved to another state
Husband still loves me and wants me back and he doesn't want to think of divorce ...by the way i cant afford the divorce fee so im really stuck. i cant go back tough cause i know how bud it was and if i had to support him back then financially and mentally now i have to do it for 2 ..him and my baby ..h has a lot of personal problems that i can't deal or help him anymore.
I want this kid to have my last name as the father doesn't want to participate in any way ...but i don't know the low and what is going to happen ....
please if anyone has any answer for me i'll appreciated.

Let's say a woman in your position is named Jenny James.


If Jenny wants the child she is expecting to bear her last name, James, all she has to is name the baby: Jessie James.


By law, because you are married, your husband is the PUTATIVE (presumptive legal) father.


There is NOTHING you can do about that, unless you DO decide to divorce.


Divorces are very cheap these days.


In your state, NY, you can do the divorce yourself.


But, I'd cross that bridge AFTER baby has arrived, especially because you indicated some medical issues and your advanced age (40 years old can be difficult) in becoming pregnant with your first child.



I wish you well, and hope you have a healthy, happy, baby.


Simply name the baby whatever you want to name him or her.


If you are asked who is that father, you can simply say, "I don't know."


That isn't a lie, because in your scenario you have reasons to think it could be a couple of men.


Good luck.