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Question regarding review for CS due to dad not being home/overnights on his parenting days/nights.

Discussion in 'Child Support' started by Pooky, Sep 27, 2021.

  1. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    To be clear, I did not talk with the child about taking dad back to court for child support. I talked to him about staying at my house on a more permanent basis. At first when i would ask dad what was going on etc I asked DAD about changing it, and so dad was mad at child for telling me he wasn't home during his parenting days/nights. Child got mad at me for reaching out to dad asking why dad is not home especially at night during his parenting days/weekends because child thought he was telling me in trust that i wouldn't say anything to dad (that he was telling me and also staying at my house during dads parenting time). That was in the beginning. This is ongoing 3 months now. No, I am not a perfect parent. But I am a parent that utilizes my parenting time and has for the last 20 years. When my 16yo comes to me and is extremely upset about dad choosing a girl over spending time with him, of course I hurt for my child. Especially when 18 comes very fast so I tried to rectify it by going to dad first (as did our other children and his parents-not by my doing, that was on their own as our 16yo talked to them as well). Nothing has changed, it has gotten worse. So that is why I am on this site to ask questions.
     
    Last edited: Sep 28, 2021
  2. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I didn't. And I kind of resent this: without a parent talking bad about another parent"" . How am i talking bad about the other parent? Our children have the same history. How dad treats our children, his actions, his words... as they have aged they all know how he is. Like I mentioned earlier though, dad was better so it seemed to the 16yo, spending most of the time and weekends together, and suddenly unavailable. They also know and realize over the years how I have been and am treated by dad in front of them. There is a pattern but I digress.
     
  3. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Thank you. I will check the calculator. I am fairly certain it would be more than a 20% increase.
     
  4. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    Exactly - my post was intended to cause the person I was responding to to go back and read your posts more closely.
     
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  5. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    Why would this be cause for modifying child support? You need to file to modify the parenting plan.
     
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  6. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    Except that the teen is going to dad's for the weekend for dad's parenting time - and dad left him alone for the weekend - it says dad left town. And then kid left town - well why not. Dad left town and left him alone...

    It sounds like dad is making pretty poor parenting decisions when he has his parenting time. I mean I expect a 16 year old to make stupid choices at some point. Not the parent.
     
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  7. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    It sounds to me like the kid got sick while dad was out...
    There are poor decisions all around on this one, IMO.
     
  8. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    I updated it after I re-read that cluster of a paragraph that the kid went out to see his SO after dad left town.
     
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  9. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    If you wait long enough, the RIGHT one comes along with the insight to discern the hidden truth.

    Thank you, my friend for appearing at the right time and asking the right question.
     
  10. stealthy1

    stealthy1 Active Member

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    Of course, that answer was provided yesterday - post #4.
     
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  11. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I took our child to a dermatology appt Thursday. Child seemed fine. Friday child noticed something swollen on leg and very painful. Dad took child to clinic, they gave a shot of antibiotic and gave 10 day antibiotic prescription for Cellulitis, gave orders to rest with leg up, take meds, etc. Dad left town due to a commitment due to him saying he got parenting weekends mixed up and had already made the commitment to go out of town with GF. Child stayed home alone at dads (did check in with me Friday night). Next day Saturday i texted in AM to see how child was. Child texted back- Supposedly fine. Sat. afternoon i received the call from child's SO to meet at the ER (I had no idea child left town). So dad already knew child was sick and left town anyhow. I told dad Saturday ER Doctor put child on different antibiotics due to possible MRSA and infection. Dad stayed out of town, never responded to me but was in communication with child. Child stayed with me Saturday/Sunday overnight.
     
  12. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    Why didn't kiddo contact one of his parents instead of his SO?
     
  13. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Child was laying down in the back seat of the car in pain and SO was driving to the ER when i was called. The SO called me using my child's cellphone. Child was already with SO who lives out of town (about an hour away).
     
  14. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    Ok, I'll lay this out clear as day for you. YOUR CHILD should have known better than to go traipsing off to his SO's house when he's supposed to be at home. I agree that dad made poor choices, but I do hope you're addressing the poor choices your child made.

    That's about all I've got to say here - best of luck to you.
     
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  15. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Yes I am.
     
  16. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Not to worry, I have addressed it (more than once which probably was unnecessary).
     
  17. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    I'd be going to court to modify the parenting plan since the dad doesn't seem to even want to use the parenting time he has. Also - yeah talk to your kid about don't leave town without asking first but he's 16 - teenagers do stupid stuff. Let's all be realistic. I'd be more upset at dad leaving the kid alone to go with gf than anything. If he did mix up his weekends, he could have worked with you to switch them. Like - kid stayed with you that weekend and he had him the next. Not just "oh well I had this commitment so I'll just leave my kid home alone despite it being my weekend." That's my opinion - I don't get parents who don't want to use their parenting time when they only see their kids every other weekend.
     
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  18. Pooky

    Pooky Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Thank you. Thank you to everyone.
     

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