- Jurisdiction
- New York
Hello, my wife and I have been married 15 years and have two children, 13 and 11. My wife recently discovered that I have been unfaithful to her many times in our marriage by visiting prostitutes and massage parlors. I have admitted everything to her and taken full responsibility and ownership of my behavior. I started therapy immediately upon her discovering this and we also started couples counseling. I haven't repeated my behavior since she discovered this five months ago. The plan has been to stay together and try and work through it,, but she's having a hard time and she told me this morning that she wants me to leave.
The main issue I am looking to get some guidance on is custody of the kids, specifically in light of the fact that my wife is an alcoholic and suffers from depression. She has had problems with drinking for over 10 years, since just after our youngest was born. She still actively drinks despite having gone to 3 rehab facilities, multiple AA meetings, counseling etc. She even was receiving monthly shots of naltrexone to help her stop but that did not help. She has not been able to achieve more than 7 months of sobriety in the last 10 years, and that is the longest stretch by far. She has frequently driven while intoxicated and has even driven with the kids in the car while intoxicated on a few occasions.
Her drinking has increased substantially since she found out about my cheating, and her depression has caused her to be unable to get out of bed on multiple occasions in the last few months. She has struggled with depression her entire adult life.
Obviously this situation is a mess and I'm ashamed of my role in this. I am looking to meet with a lawyer as soon as possible, but in the meantime what I'm trying to understand is will her drinking history have an impact on custody? I wouldn't want to keep the kids from her, but I don't feel comfortable with her having sole responsibility for watching the kids for an extended period of time.
The main issue I am looking to get some guidance on is custody of the kids, specifically in light of the fact that my wife is an alcoholic and suffers from depression. She has had problems with drinking for over 10 years, since just after our youngest was born. She still actively drinks despite having gone to 3 rehab facilities, multiple AA meetings, counseling etc. She even was receiving monthly shots of naltrexone to help her stop but that did not help. She has not been able to achieve more than 7 months of sobriety in the last 10 years, and that is the longest stretch by far. She has frequently driven while intoxicated and has even driven with the kids in the car while intoxicated on a few occasions.
Her drinking has increased substantially since she found out about my cheating, and her depression has caused her to be unable to get out of bed on multiple occasions in the last few months. She has struggled with depression her entire adult life.
Obviously this situation is a mess and I'm ashamed of my role in this. I am looking to meet with a lawyer as soon as possible, but in the meantime what I'm trying to understand is will her drinking history have an impact on custody? I wouldn't want to keep the kids from her, but I don't feel comfortable with her having sole responsibility for watching the kids for an extended period of time.