Mother Legal guardian and possible father

C

Cmkersey98

New Member
Hi my name is Clavonna, I'm 16 y/o from VA. 4 months ago I had a beautiful baby boy me and my boyfriend (not my son's father) signed the birth certificate. A month later before I started school I gave my son to my friend Stephanie (temporarily) till I can get caught up. While my son was there Stephanie cousin said he might be the father. So, they went behind my back and took a DNA test. After several days we found out he was the father but I don't want him in my son's life because he smokes and has a bad criminal record and he got into a car accident with my son once. I just really fear when i'm not around he is not doing nothing for my son. My boyfriend is willing to step into his place and i'm totally cool with that but I have three BIG questions to ask:
1. Can my boyfriend get in trouble for signing the birth certificate( By that time I thought he was the father nothing false)?
2. Will my boyfriend have to start paying for child support even if he isn't my son's father but name is still on the birth certificate?
3. How can I get full custody?
 
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1. Can my boyfriend get in trouble for signing the birth certificate( By that time I thought he was the father nothing false)?
Trouble no but the actual Father can take court action to be child's legal Father

2. Will my boyfriend have to start paying for child support even if he isn't my son's father but name is still on the birth certificate?
Child support is paid by legal Father at this time thats BF

3. How can I get full custody?
You already have full custody until Dad seeks court order otherwise
 
Caught up on what exactly? Babies are not a pair of jeans to be passed around between girlfriends. If you aren't interested/able to raise him yourself, put the baby up for adoption. It is not going to bode well for you in any court action to be leaving baby with various friends. If I understand you correctly, it came as a surprise that this cousin was the father. Being as you are not married, none of these guys have parental rights. Boyfriend had to know, as did you, that he was not the baby daddy. Playing dumb is not going to go over well. Right now, amazingly, you still have full custody though one call to CPS that you gave away your baby and it is not going to be pretty. Bio Dad can file to establish paternity and as he already has proof he is the father, he will probably be granted at least visitation. If you didn't want baby around an ex-con, bad driver who smokes, don't create a child with him. Now you and baby are stuck with the consequences. Getting full and sole custody after giving baby to someone else for a bit is going to be tough.

BF won't get in trouble but can easily be disproved as the father. Birth certificates are not multiple choice and short of you marrying bf and him filing for adoption of the baby, he will never be the legal father. Of course he won't have to pay child support. The baby isn't his. Even if you were to file in court for support from him, it is easy enough to prove the baby is not his child.

Look, you are young, and it sounds like your parents are either checked out or incapable of parenting. You can't handle raising this child. You need to seriously consider adoption. The bio-dad would be able to object but that is a conversation to have between the two of you. Talk to your school counselor, minister, and social services in your area to get your life back under control. Whether you keep baby or not, you can not keep passing him around to friends to raise.
 
Elle, I know where you're coming from and I don't necessarily disagree.

But.

This baby is 4 months old. Mom never signed over custody; the state really doesn't care too much that she had a "permanent babysitter" watching the child while she... did... whatever it was that she did. Now if Stephanie wants to raise a ruckus, that's up to Stephanie.

But Mom already has sole custody. She needs to do nothing else in terms of custody. There's nothing else to discuss in terms of custody, truly.

Now is it foolish for children to raise children? Yeah, generally that's a pretty good rule of thumb. But still, if that's what they want to do, all we can do is nod our heads to their decision, tell them what they can realistically expect and hope to high water that they'll do what's best for this child.
 
Here is another problem ElleMD I have never seen that DNA test from the guy that claims he is the possible father. They (His family) showed me a paper and took it back so fast I could hardly read it. So, I'm not so sure if he is or he is in it for the money. Lately him and his family is really tight on money and he gets a disability check I've heard from several people that if someone that has a disability check and a child gets more money added on to their check. That why me and the possible father don't have joint custody but his parents keep telling him he does I never went to court for it. Anyways I didn't give away my child I asked her can she give me a month or so to get back on track for school there was no legal papers signed.
 
Cmkersey98 said:
Here is another problem ElleMD I have never seen that DNA test from the guy that claims he is the possible father. They (His family) showed me a paper and took it back so fast I could hardly read it. So, I'm not so sure if he is or he is in it for the money. Lately him and his family is really tight on money and he gets a disability check I've heard from several people that if someone that has a disability check and a child gets more money added on to their check. That why me and the possible father don't have joint custody but his parents keep telling him he does I never went to court for it. Anyways I didn't give away my child I asked her can she give me a month or so to get back on track for school there was no legal papers signed.
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Okay, you seem to reqire a paternity test.
The state of VA will do this on your behalf.
But, you need to get your parents of guardians involve din this.
Its an overwhelming thing to raise a child at age 35, and its nearly impossible at age 16 and still trying to finish high school, or get that GED.
You also need to make sure that baby has health insurance and is receiving proper medical care.
Again, the state will assist you with all of this, so get started first thing tomorrow, okay?
You take good care of the little baby, to, because I get the feeling things are tough, but you really want to be a great mom.
Get help, its out there, and you can do it.

You need to contact this agency, or have mom or your guardian help you:

http://www.dss.virginia.gov/pub/pdf/dcse_paternity.pdf

https://www.vapaternity.org/
 

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