Mental Health Thread #5 - It's a New Year!

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When my son died, the best thing for me was to keep busy doing something, pretty much anything, that kept my mind occupied. If I didn't stay busy, I had too much time to think, which was not a good thing.

My advice to people who ask usually is, find people who will be there for you when you feel like connecting with people - in this day and age we connect with each other in so many and varied ways. Have friends/family you can call or visit if you feel like it, or connect with online friends. Don't feel like you have to behave in a certain way. Grief is an emotion that is shared throughout the human race, but not everyone grieves in exactly the same way, so you aren't doing it wrong if you don't experience it in the same way as the next person. I had family members who thought I handled it too well and are probably still waiting for me to have a total breakdown, even 17 years later, because they just "know" that's what would happen to them, even though they've never experienced it themselves.

Disregard anyone who tries to tell you that you will "get over" losing someone; in fact I wouldn't want to get over losing my son because that would diminish who he was and the impact he made on the lives of everyone who knew him in his relatively short time with us (he died at 24). I think about him every day, generally with a smile on my face remembering things he said or did. My favorite saying about a lost loved one is something I found shortly after he died: "Mourn not too long that he is gone, but rejoice forever that he was".
 
Thanks Elle & txls. That's what I need to do. Some of it is hard for me because I feel like I'm bothering people when I reach out to them. Some of the suggestions I can do though.

Watching the Olympics - even Elle seems to like them even though she isn't into "normal" sports. It seems like some areas are in for some more bad weather.
 
cynthiag, your post wasn't there yet when I started mine above - it took me a while to get mine submitted off (interruptions...). I didn't see yours until mine posted. Thank you very much for that post.
 
You are not bothering anyone by reaching out. It might help to find a support group in your area too so you meet others who are in the same boat. I know you don't have a huge family but I'm sure those you do have are hurting too.

"Supposed" to get 12 inches tomorrow night. That penguin is an awful tease but not real keen on THAT much snow. Four years ago at this time I was rocked by 5 feet of snow. I am not sure I have ever recovered.
 
I used to be alone quite a lot and especially in winter I would get down sometimes. What always picked me up was to borrow somebody's kids for a few hours. It always cheered me up and was greatly appreciated by Mom.
 
Thank you Elle & txls. Elle, I don't know which is worse - significant snow or the ice storm some states are predicted to get (that will make for some slick streets) with a good possibility of a loss of power. I don't want either but probably would opt for snow. Maybe you will not get as much as predicted. fingers crossed!
 
We are "finally" getting some actual winter weather...I knew we would eventually so we were just waiting for it to hit us. Granted, it's nowhere near as bad as many places, but in the last two days we've gotten up to 18 inches of snow in areas (only about 8 or 9 at my house) with a few more in the forecast for today, and then for the next week it's supposed to do various combinations of rain & snow, snow & rain, and freezing so it's gonna be messy before it's over with. This town is built up the side of a mountain for the most part so everything is hills, so that gets pretty exciting. Our road is a very gradual hill but we slid into the opposite lane of traffice pulling out of the driveway today, and on our way to work we met a school bus sliding down a very steep hill backwards. Scary!

One plus about the snow, our Husky-mix doggy loves it! We call this "Husky weather" around our house!
 
I used to live at the top of a very steep hill. Plows could generally not make it up the hill whenwe got heavy snow and really not when there was ice.
 
We are "finally" getting some actual winter weather...I knew we would eventually so we were just waiting for it to hit us. Granted, it's nowhere near as bad as many places, but in the last two days we've gotten up to 18 inches of snow in areas (only about 8 or 9 at my house) with a few more in the forecast for today, and then for the next week it's supposed to do various combinations of rain & snow, snow & rain, and freezing so it's gonna be messy before it's over with. This town is built up the side of a mountain for the most part so everything is hills, so that gets pretty exciting. Our road is a very gradual hill but we slid into the opposite lane of traffice pulling out of the driveway today, and on our way to work we met a school bus sliding down a very steep hill backwards. Scary!

One plus about the snow, our Husky-mix doggy loves it! We call this "Husky weather" around our house!

Scary stuff. Well at least the doggy is happy. :)
 
My lab mix loves snow too, but the last storm we got a thick layer of snow followed by ice. You can pretty much walk on it without sinking. She didn't love that so much when she went out to play and went splat.
 
My lab/bordercollie mix is outside right now in drifts of at least 12 inches. It is too funny to watch him walk (kind of prissy because he is picking up his legs really high)! But he's not barking to come back in.

And I just found the major downside to working from home...you still have to work even with a major snow! Even if the county/city closed all the roads....darnit!
 
And I just found the major downside to working from home...you still have to work even with a major snow! Even if the county/city closed all the roads....darnit!

Years ago not near as many employees worked from home - wasn't possible for many jobs, for various reasons, that can now be done at home.
 
Happy Valentine's Day, everyone ♥. (though I wish I was saying Happy Spring!
 
We're supposed to have spring-like weather this weekend. Hope so because I'll have 3 kids and it would be nice to be able to get outside.
 
We're supposed to have warmish temps (low 40's), rain and winds up to 40 mph over the next 24 hours or so. That should wash much of the snow off, but will probably leave some patches of solid ice that are too thick to "rain off" during that time. Then it's supposed to drop back down below freezing and snow some more. Oh, joy.
 
Enjoy.

The good news is that they cancelled our Winter Storm Watch. The bad news is that they replaced it with a Blizzard Watch.

6-10 inches. Oh joy.
 
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