Live with wife and our daughter and want a divorce

[LeosQuest]

I want a divorce from my wife whom i have been married for 2 years now. We had a child 7 years ago out of wedlock. Our relationship has been turbulent since day one. However, we got married for our daughter's best interest, at least i did it for my daughter's happiness. However, still, we are incompatible and hardly enjoy each other's company more so now. My wife threatens me that she will take full custody of our daughter and make me pay out of my ass for child support and any other expenses she wants me to be burdened with. My daughter is my life, and i would do anything for her happiness, but within my abilities. Even more, my wife more recently is brain washing our daughter and tells her negative things about me in front of me, and when i would tell her to stop and that it isn't right to involve our daughter in our problems, she would tell my daughter "see, your father is yelling at me again!" I'm so stressed beyond belief and want a divorce, but we all live in the same house (my wife, daughter and myself), and my wife is currently unemployed and collecting unemployment and does not want to work. I can't leave the house because the house we live in was purchased by my father as a gift to me, but the house is in my name with my father as a cosigner. I'm so stressed and really don't know what to do. I don't want to leave and then my wife uses that against me to say i abandoned my house and our daughter. Advise would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Proserpina]

One quick question first....are you legally established as Dad?

 

[LeosQuest]

Yes, i am legally established as the dad, and have the pertinent documentation to back it up. I am the biological father.

 

[tpajet]

This is going to be a messy divorce situation. You need to hire a divorce attorney. And the sooner, the better. Some of this will depend on your state laws, but generally speaking, don't leave the home. Keep in mind that if you end up with a split custody agreement, she may not be able to get child support since you both would be supporting the child. As long as both sides are providing for the child equally, there is nothing to collect. However if your daughter goes to live with mom full time, that would be different. On the other hand, you might be able to use what she's doing against her, on the basis that she's manipulating your daughter against you. But that depends on how far you want to go with the case.

But the best thing is to get an attorney and find out what your rights are. It sounds like you soon to be ex is trying to scare you with some hot air based on your lack of knowledge of the law, or what she perceives to be a lack of knowledge. Time to put an end to her crap.

 

[Proserpina]

Yes, i am legally established as the dad, and have the pertinent documentation to back it up. I am the biological father.

(as long as you realize that biological father does NOT necessarily equate to legal father)

Honestly, you need to file for divorce and, in as part of the petition, request temporary custody and exclusive use of the marital home.

You CAN do this without an attorney. Go down to the court house in the morning and request the forms; the court clerk can give you the forms (but cannot help you fill them out).

 

[Duranie]

Stop listening to your wife. Your wife is in the wrong state for her to think you have no rights. NV is actually a father friend state. VERY. Child support is based off of both incomes and you likely will get joint. You should ask for the house in the divorce. You need to file for divorce, and ask for exclusive use of the house. Do not listen to her at all.

 

[LeosQuest]

My wife (soon to be) is currently unemployed, but collecting unemployment. I am concerned that when i file for divorce, she will say that she can't afford to move out due to she being unemployed. I know if i leave, as it won't be a good idea to live in the same house during the divorce process, she will say i abandoned my daughter and home. My soon to be ex wife has a temper (New York Temper) and flips out. One time i signed up for Facebook and started adding my high school and college friends, family members, etc. My soon to be ex found out i had a facebook account and flipped out because i never told her about it. She grabbed a plate from the kitchen and threw it at me, but missed, and the plate hit the wall and broke. My daughter was present. I immediately went to another room and closed the door to avoid the conflict, but my soon to be ex wife followed and started kicking the door and insisting i open the door immediately. I told her i don't want to fight, and that she was overreacting about my Facebook account. My soon to be ex wife continued kicking the door and used a butter knife or the end of a fork to try to unlock the door, which caused damage to the door handle. After 2 or so minutes of my wife continuing to kick and punch and try to pry the door open, i finally said enough is enough, and yelled out to her that i would call the cops, as she was acting crazy. She immediately barked at me and said "Go ahead! You'll see who the cops believe!" My friends and family do not want to get involved as they fear my soon to be ex wife will hold it against them and never speak to them ever again. I also fear that my wife will call my work and humiliate me and try to create problems for me at work. This leaves me in a very difficult position, but i know i have to get the divorce soon, or things could get more complicated and even worse, and risk affecting my daughter. So stressed!

 

[army judge]

My wife (soon to be) is currently unemployed, but collecting unemployment. I am concerned that when i file for divorce, she will say that she can't afford to move out due to she being unemployed. I know if i leave, as it won't be a good idea to live in the same house during the divorce process, she will say i abandoned my daughter and home. My soon to be ex wife has a temper (New York Temper) and flips out. One time i signed up for Facebook and started adding my high school and college friends, family members, etc. My soon to be ex found out i had a facebook account and flipped out because i never told her about it. She grabbed a plate from the kitchen and threw it at me, but missed, and the plate hit the wall and broke. My daughter was present. I immediately went to another room and closed the door to avoid the conflict, but my soon to be ex wife followed and started kicking the door and insisting i open the door immediately. I told her i don't want to fight, and that she was overreacting about my Facebook account. My soon to be ex wife continued kicking the door and used a butter knife or the end of a fork to try to unlock the door, which caused damage to the door handle. After 2 or so minutes of my wife continuing to kick and punch and try to pry the door open, i finally said enough is enough, and yelled out to her that i would call the cops, as she was acting crazy. She immediately barked at me and said "Go ahead! You'll see who the cops believe!" My friends and family do not want to get involved as they fear my soon to be ex wife will hold it against them and never speak to them ever again. I also fear that my wife will call my work and humiliate me and try to create problems for me at work. This leaves me in a very difficult position, but i know i have to get the divorce soon, or things could get more complicated and even worse, and risk affecting my daughter. So stressed!

Posting on this forum may allow you to vent, but won't get you the help you require.

You can contact a battered spouse shelter and see if they will help you.

You can speak to the police, at the police station, and ask for help.

You can go to court and get an order of protection against your wife.

NOTHING will change UNLESS you do something.

The longer you wait, the longer you will hurt!

Seek the help that you have been apprised is available.

Good luck!!!:yes:

 

[nitikasnv]

If you are best then:

Hi,

Well its very awkward situation.

Its about your daughter's future.

I suggest that ask your daughter with whom she is comfortable,i don't know what's her age but if she is enough mature then ask her.

Or i suggest you one more thing that try to make out ,discuss with your wife why she is not comfortable with you and find the solution.

This will be best solution for all of you.

Thanks

 

[LeosQuest]

Hello there,

my daughter is not at the age to understand all of this; however, a child needs both parents no matter what.

in regards to discussing it with my wife, well, my wife will do anything for her sole benefit, even to the point of using our daughter to benefit. I would do anything for my daughter to the best of my abilities.

One of my concerns is that we all live together still and it would be really difficult to be under the same roof during the divorce process. I don't have relatives or close friends locally, as they all are in Chicago and i am in Nevada, and the same goes for my wife.

My wife gets hostile towards me and purposely starts argument in front of our daughter. My wife also fabricates things and brain washes our daughter.

I know the laws in Nevada, and i know i have equal rights as a father. I express myself on this site to get other peoples advise through there experiences such as mine or through expertise, such a being a lawyer.

I am currently the only person employed, and my wife collects unemployment. My wife does not like to work. I have a good job; however, i have taken a pay cut in order to stay employed. I also cannot afford what i believe to be a the divorce battle with my wife. Like i said, she will do what she can to get what she wants. The cost for a divorce (lawyer fees) daunt me. I would rather put that money in a savings account for my daughter for college. Any advise would greatly be appreciated. I truly love my daughter, and would do all i can to be a huge part of her life!

Hi,

Well its very awkward situation.

Its about your daughter's future.

I suggest that ask your daughter with whom she is comfortable,i don't know what's her age but if she is enough mature then ask her.

Or i suggest you one more thing that try to make out ,discuss with your wife why she is not comfortable with you and find the solution.

This will be best solution for all of you.

Thanks