Family member wants guardianship of my children

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My children and I have been living with my sister and her family since July. I received in the mail today papers stating that my sister is seeking guardianship of my children. The paper is a consent for her guardianship and a waiver of a hearing on the matter. The accompanying letter says to sign and return in the SASE (which I am not about to do). However, there seems to be no date as to a time limit in which I am supposed to do this. I am assuming that if I don't sign, it will eventually go to court. Is that right? Does anyone have any ideas as to what I need to do here? I am going to school and actively seeking employment. My husband is employed full time. They, on the other hand, are both unemployed at this time. Does that make a difference? I'm am understandably very upset here, and would appreciate any advice. Thank you!
 
You don't have to do anything with her attempts to extort you and steal your children.
You say you're not gong to sign, so that'll end chapter one.
I suppose she could then serve you with subpoena in an effort to summons you before a judge, where she will have to PROVE to a court that you're an unfit aren't and she'd be a better parent.
If that happens, obey the summons, hire a lawyer, or illustrate to the court why her allegations are baseless.
Being unemployed, or being financially disadvantaged aren't crimes, so on those allegations Aline; you shoud fare well.
Lastly, if dad is around, he would fare better than she would, not saying he'd prevail; but his rights are equal to yours.
So, you might wish to inform him of these shenanigans, presuming you're on good terms.
 
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Thank you! That was my post btw lol. Had trouble logging in! Anyways, she says if I don't sign it she'll take it to court. She has filled my kids' heads with so much crap that they are going along with her. Will that be a problem if it goes to court?
 
What is the basis for her claim to guardianship? Courts do not give guardianship of children to others just on a whim.
 
cbg - I have no idea! She just says that she thinks that it is what is best for the kids. We've had a rough couple of years, and have had to send them to stay with her a few times because they did not need to be living in the situation we were stuck in. So, basically she figures that they'll just be back here anyway so she should be able to legally keep them here. I'm guessing that's her train of thought anyway.
 
Please don't be insulted by these questions. They are all for a purpose (and I don't know you or your situation).

1.) When you say, a rough couple of years, are you referring to financial reasons, or are you referring to problems in your marriage?
2.) If the second, has there been any kind of domestic violence?
3.) You say that you and your children are living with her. Is your husband?
4.) Is she providing financial support? I know you explained the employment situation but who is and is not employed does not always coincide with who is providing support
5.) Do you and/or the children have health insurance? Does she?
6.) How old are the children? Are they in school?

Remember, these questions are not intended to be insulting. From what you've posted it's not only unlikely that she will get any kind of guardianship but she's more likely to get yelled at by the judge for wasting his time. The questions are to determine whether there's something, anything, that might change that.
 
slayerforever said:
cbg - I have no idea! She just says that she thinks that it is what is best for the kids. We've had a rough couple of years, and have had to send them to stay with her a few times because they did not need to be living in the situation we were stuck in. So, basically she figures that they'll just be back here anyway so she should be able to legally keep them here. I'm guessing that's her train of thought anyway.
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I suggest you stop sending your children to live with others.
I'm not being critical or judgmental in saying that, madam.
I'm simply suggesting one way to insulate you and your kids from these kinds of devastating proceedings.

Boarding your children with others for extended periods of time could potentially lead to bigger issues for you and might be used to hurt your maternal rights.
As far as kids testifying in court about where they'd like to live, or with whom they'd like to live, it rarely happens; but when it does it's usually anecdotal to legal issues.

I'm curious, where are your kids right now?

I hope they aren't with the person that's trying to extort them from your care!

If they are, I suggest you IMMEDIATELY go retrieve them.

It might be advisable to have the police meet you there.
 
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Definitely don't sign the consent for guardianship paper. You said you weren't so that's good & the correct thing to do. (don't sign)

If she does summon you to court, get a lawyer & go from there. She is going to have to have a very good reason before a judge will give her guardianship of your children.
 
OP, could you please clarify?

Are you and the children currently living with your sister?

How many times, and for how long, have they lived with your sister without you?
 
1.) When you say, a rough couple of years, are you referring to financial reasons, or are you referring to problems in your marriage?
Financial reasons. It's a long story but the dried up version is that our landlord wouldn't fix our water and we didn't have the money to move the trailer, then my husband lost his job (no fault of his own - it was the economy) twice in a year, so we lost our home twice. We were stuck in two places my children did not need to be - one with no running water and one that should probably be condemned.
2.) If the second, has there been any kind of domestic violence? NO. My husband would never hurt any of us.
3.) You say that you and your children are living with her. Is your husband? No - he isn't allowed to stay here. They don't really like him very much. They're very judgmental people.
4.) Is she providing financial support? I know you explained the employment situation but who is and is not employed does not always coincide with who is providing support I bought all of their school supplies. I buy groceries for the house. I give money whenever I have it. The only things she pays is her light bill, and some of the money I've given her has I'm sure gone toward that at some point.
5.) Do you and/or the children have health insurance? Does she? My kids have Medicaid, I have share of cost. I think she has insurance but I'm not sure.
6.) How old are the children? Are they in school? They are 16, 14, and 12 Yes they're in school.
 
Army Judge,
My children and I are staying with her right now. We've got nowhere else to go! We plan on getting a place with our income taxes. We've been in a downward spiral for a few years, but are finally getting things back on track! The biggest obstacle was the fact that I had no drivers license due to a car wreck (long story) and we live in a rural area so there is no public transportation. It was almost impossible for me to have a job! And then my husband lost his job twice. Now he has a good job and I finally (after 8 very long years) have my license back! And a car! But this woman verbally abuses me in front of my children and I really think that they are taking their cues from her. She's got them thinking that I'm just not worth anything.
 
That being the case, I can't see any reason why she would be granted guardianship of your children. Pro, what think you?
 
Proserpina said:
I'm still waiting for answers (unless I'm missed 'em)
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I'm sorry! Yes, we are currently staying with her. We sent them to stay with her for about 6 months when we had no running water and then again about two years later when we were living in a place whose list of problems is entirely too long, and that was also for about 6 months. Both times we just had to wait on income taxes to move since we live paycheck to paycheck.
 
slayerforever said:
Army Judge,
My children and I are staying with her right now. We've got nowhere else to go! We plan on getting a place with our income taxes. We've been in a downward spiral for a few years, but are finally getting things back on track! The biggest obstacle was the fact that I had no drivers license due to a car wreck (long story) and we live in a rural area so there is no public transportation. It was almost impossible for me to have a job! And then my husband lost his job twice. Now he has a good job and I finally (after 8 very long years) have my license back! And a car! But this woman verbally abuses me in front of my children and I really think that they are taking their cues from her. She's got them thinking that I'm just not worth anything.
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As I said, madam, being financially disadvantaged is not a crime.

Few people can say they have never struggled in their life.

The fact that you have a plan to make things better for you and your family indicates that you're trying to do what's right.

You live with this FEMALE, she's your SISTER, and she sends you a letter about this very sensitive topic; rather than sit down with you and talk about it.

However, to be fair, she is offering you some shelter, comforts, and care; so she isn't entirely evil.

I suspect she wants what is best for the kids, jusr as you do.

This is all just so sad.

Well, I'd say keep fixing the things you've identified that need improvement.

Follow your plan that you've created, work that plan.

Do whatever it takes to get all of you back together and under one roof.

I don't see any thing that you're doing that makes you or your hubby bad parents.

You appear to have been hit with lots of bad luck, just like millions of other, very hard working people.

I say just stay focused, keep working away at your goal, and get your own home.

If this goes to court, just tell the truth and let the judge know what you're doing to get into your home.

I also suggest you contact nearest The Salvation Army Chapter, the nearest Catholic Charities, and The Red Cross.

They can sometimes assist people in your situation with getting resettled.

The state social services agency can sometimes help in some states, especially when it comes to keeping families together.

The local school district in some states can offer limited advice and help in rare cases.

There is one potential ray of sunshine in all of this darkness, madam.

Contact the counselor of your oldest child (or any of your children) at his or her school.

Make an appointment to meet with that counselor.

Your children are technically homeless because you are temporarily residing with relatives.

The school will then classify as to be eligible for assistance because of your temporary situation.

There are several federal programs (as well as private programs) that the school can refer you to because of your difficulty.

Once you tell your story to the counselor, he or she will assist and your family in connecting proper agency to get resettled.

Also, see if there is a CIS (Community in Schools Program) in your school district.

This is their website, and you can see what help they offer to people that find themselves in your predicament.

My wife teaches in a public high school and has seen how CIS can assist families in your plight.

http://www.communitiesinschools.org/faq/

Try these ideas, and speak to these agencies.

Once you let them know about your problems, you might be surprised at how they respond.
 
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Thank you! I'll look into all of that:) This may be a stupid question, but I realized that guardianship is not actual custody, right? They're two different things? So if she were to be granted guardianship, would that mean that she could make my kids live with her? Because from what I read, guardianship is what you get when you have someone else's kids but need to be able to take them to the doctor or sign things for school and whatnot. Thanks again :)
 
slayerforever said:
Thank you! I'll look into all of that:) This may be a stupid question, but I realized that guardianship is not actual custody, right? They're two different things? So if she were to be granted guardianship, would that mean that she could make my kids live with her? Because from what I read, guardianship is what you get when you have someone else's kids but need to be able to take them to the doctor or sign things for school and whatnot. Thanks again :)
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If she were to be appointed guardian, she'd have more rights than you suggest.

Guardianship would confer upon her the rights equivalent to mom or dad.
 
slayerforever said:
Ok so then what is the difference between the two?
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You're confusing CUSTODY with GUARDIANSHIP/CONSERVATORHIP.

Custody allows one to do as you suggest.

GUARDIANSHIP effectively confers PARENTAL RIGHTS on the person.

If it were me, I wouldn't want anyone to become a GUARDIAN over my children.

However, say I was very ill.

It would be necessary, perhaps, to have my sister act as a custodian for me and my children; until I could recuperate.

One (CUSTODY), implies a temporary power.

The other (GUARDIANSHIP), implies a more permanent power.
 
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