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Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

Discussion in 'Paternity Law & DNA Tests' started by lynng, Jul 20, 2012.

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  1. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    In NC, can a woman force a man to pay for an abortion? My boyfriend's ex-girlfriend says she is pregnant with HIS child, but we know without a doubt that she cheated on him during the 6/7 weeks they were together, plus she was with someone right before him, and a couple of guys right after him. Each time he refuses to pay (he does not believe in abortion and has told her he will take full custody of the baby should a DNA test prove it is his), she comes up with some crazy reason why she has to have the abortion, and why he has to pay for it. She has said that she has cancer and will die if she doesn't have an abortion. Now she says she has MRSA and will die without an abortion (easily treatable even during a pregnancy). She refuses to provide him with any type of proof that she is even truly pregnant, other than to offer to give him an ultrasound picture "once it has been developed" (they are printed out at the time of the ultrasound). She threatens to go to his parents, and he is worried that she will try to physically hurt them. We just don't know how to handle the situation anymore.
     
  2. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

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    Your BF has no legal obligation to do anything
     
  3. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    One more quick question that I meant to include in my post...

    Do you happen to know if she would be able to put his name on the child's birth certificate without his consent or knowledge?

    Thank you so much!
     
  4. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I do want to add that should a DNA test prove the child to be his, we plan to fight for full-custody, as she is an unfit mother to the 2 children she already has.
     
  5. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

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    She can name Bill Clinton as baby's Father but it carries no weight without the Father acknowledging or a paternity test
     
  6. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Thanks! We really don't believe she is pregnant at all considering the fact that at supposedly 15 weeks along, she still will not provide any kind of proof that a fetus even exists. She has 3 recent speeding tickets, plus a warrent out for her arrest on Failure to Appear charges stemming from the 1st speeding ticket. She already has 2 children, does not work, gets Medicaid and foodstamps, lives with her mom. There is no doubt in my mind that she is just trying to get money out of him. I've suggested he get his cell phone number changed so that she can't call or text him anymore, but he doesn't want to do that since she is threatening to harass his older parents.
     
  7. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    It took two to tango.
    I doubt that your boyfriend has told you the truth.
    He could change his number and his parents' number, too.
    He WANTS her to call him.
    I've seen this sad game many times. You have, too. He's still boffing her. Don't be naive. Don't let his love proclamations blind you or make you stupid.

    Last of all, think. It might be time to jump ship before you have a problem.
    You deserve better than a bum who sleeps with the type of woman SHE is. She's a bum, too.
    Let her have him.
    I'll bet you're carrying this deadbeat anyway.

    No, she can't force him to pay for an abortion.
    No, you won't get custody, and he won't try, if the baby is born and proven to be his.
    The standard to be a parent is lower than getting a drivers license. Think about it, most everyone has a DL.
    I'd pay for her abortion, but not to her.
    I'd pay the clinic or the physician directly,not her.
    An abortion is about $500, maybe $1,000. In fact, Planned Parenthood will do them for people like her for FREE.
    An abortion is much cheaper than 18 years of child support.
    I'll bet HE has other kids spread all over the county, if not the state, or USA.
    Good luck, but you seem smart and decent. Stay that way, and get out now!!!
     
  8. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Army Judge...you are a jackass. My BF and I have been friends for a long time. I was around for the few weeks he was with her. I see every text from her. He doesn't answer a text unless I am with him. I have listened in on every phone call between them. He is a wonderful guy that got used by a manipulator who used his affection for her 2 kids to take advantage of him. When she realized that he could not afford to support her and her kids financially, she moved on to the next guy, and the next guy, and the next guy. She's stupid enough to post on Facebook everytime she hooks up with a new guy. My BF is not a bad guy just because he got taken advantage of, and I'm not blind just because I'm supportive of him. If there really is a baby, and it proves to be his, he will absolutely do the right thing and support his child. He is not looking to shirk his responsibilities.
     
  9. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

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    You might remove your attack on AJ yes he can be abrasive and his comment may be unfair but you dont need to reply with equal inapprioate comments. In your PM box I offered you another resource
     
  10. Michael Wechsler

    Michael Wechsler Administrator Staff Member

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    First of all, you don't know anything. Perhaps you have very good reason to trust him, I don't know. Let's assume you do. With regard to abortions, the answer is correct. Nobody can force anyone to do anything.

    Now here is a good question - whether or not she cheated on him, how do you KNOW who it was who is responsible for the ex-girlfriend's pregnancy? Nobody does. This could very well be a cruel prank, a complete lie and a hoax - but we don't know that yet. The fact is that we don't know anything and can't without testing. She can sue him for the cost but will have to make her case and prove it was his child. At the same time, she can choose to have the baby and that opens up a whole other can of worms. What can we help you with here? Best of luck with this. You should probably think about what you might be getting yourself involved with regarding this situation.
     
  11. Proserpina

    Proserpina Moderator

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    If you're both aware that Mom is unfit, you've contacted child services about the welfare of the other children, correct?
     
  12. Proserpina

    Proserpina Moderator

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    Your relationship is doomed, I'm sorry.
     
  13. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Well, last night BF received a text from her saying "your baby is gone". When he asked what happened, she replied "rodent matter", gotta love autocorrect lol. To those who replied with thoughtful answers, THANK YOU. To the others, in sorry you feel do jaded and cynical.
     
  14. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    To be honest, I couldn't care less about her kids and whether they are taken care of. They are not my responsibility.
     
  15. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock, tick!


    Sent from my iPhone 4S via AT&T using Tapatalk
     
  16. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Well this mess is finally over. She sent him a text last night saying the baby is gone. She also posted on FB last night about her latest victim/boyfriend.
     
  17. Michael Wechsler

    Michael Wechsler Administrator Staff Member

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    Glad to hear it's all done. That was quick - sounds like the usual hoax. I don't know your situation but always keep your eyes open.
     
  18. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I just want to say a big THANK YOU to shrinkmaster and thelawprofessor for you thoughtful advice!
     
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  19. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

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  20. lynng

    lynng Law Topic Starter New Member

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    It had actually been going on for about 2 and a half months, so it is a huge relief for this to end. From the start, I thought she was faking, just because she kept refusing to prove she was even pregnant. I think she finally gave up because at this point she was supposedly 16 weeks, and would have more than likely been visably showing if she really was pregnant. Who knows what the crazy chick was thinking...lol.

    I do want to say that just because I chose to stand with him in this situation doesn't make me naive or gulible. Nor does it make him a liar or a bad person. He is a sweet, trusting, hard-working man that made a mistake getting into a relationship with someone that was just looking for a man to support her and her kids. He and I are not perfect, and I'm sorry if that offends all the "perfect" people on her. Must be wonderful to never make a bad decision or a mistake.
     

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