Child support, from a "child's" point of view

[sampotter1]

Child support literally means to support your child. As a seventeen year old girl, I would expect to benefit from this. Instead.. there is no food in my house, I haven't gotten clothes from either of my parents in over a year, and on top of it all... my mom borrows money from me. I discovered that last year my mom made over 16,500 on my child support checks. She also make over 5,500 on some disability support to help support me also. She is the one that is "disabled." My mother is saving my child support in a bank account that only my aunt can get into. This isn't to help me with college, or to support me at all. This is to help her move out when she no longer gets child support. I also have evidence that she spends plenty of money on marijuana and cigarettes, but not so much on me. For a child that gets $300 a week to be "supported," why am I buying my own lunch everyday? Is there ANYTHING I can do about this? I honestly cannot believe my dad pays this amount when it isn't doing any good for me.

 

[Proserpina]

You do understand that child support isn't yours, correct?

It is to reimburse the custodial parent....and if your Mom wants to save it for moving expenses or spend it on Chanel shoes and Coach purses, she's allowed to do that.

..now with that said, please be truthful.

You said there is NO FOOD.

Are you telling the absolute truth here? Or are you saying that you have to buy the food that you want?

In all honesty hon, this isn't your legal matter. If your Dad feels that the child support is being misused, he's perfectly able to file an order to show cause with the court and request that Mom accounts for the spending.

However...he's not likely to be successful and if Mom objects (given that you're obviously housed, clothed etc) he'll likely end up paying her legal fees too.

 

[army judge]

If things are as bad as you say, Dearie, call "911" immediately!

The police will investigate your mother fir child neglect and/or abuse.

The police will involve social services who will place you in a "nice" foster care home (or the local juvie lockup) to keep you safe!

Or, tell a teacher about this tomorrow at school. "This" being the abuse and/or neglect that you're suffering.

The teacher will report mom, the authorities will get you placed into a "nice" foster home and you'll become a ward of the state.

 

[sampotter1]

If you count noodles as food, sure there's food. I've told me dad, and he doesn't want to give her child support, and I want to help him. She's not paying for the roof over my head or anything else really. If my house was investigated as is right now, people would see it not fit to live in. I don't know if you want to live in foster care, but I don't.

 

[Proserpina]

Yes, it counts as food.

Dad doesn't get a choice here, I'm afraid - he is legally obligated to support you and honestly, as long as you're housed, fed and clothed it's entirely up to Mom how she spends the child support.

 

[army judge]

If you count noodles as food, sure there's food. I've told me dad, and he doesn't want to give her child support, and I want to help him. She's not paying for the roof over my head or anything else really. If my house was investigated as is right now, people would see it not fit to live in. I don't know if you want to live in foster care, but I don't.

I don't have YOUR problem.

I have never had YOUR problem.

YOU have YOUR problem.

I don't care if you become HOMELESS.

You asked a question, I gave you an answer.

Good luck, you'll need it!!!!

 

[sampotter1]

apparently everyone on this site is not human. I assume some of these people are also women who get child support, and will not give it to their children. Your point of view is corrupted, and obviously this whole country needs a review on what child support is and how it should be used. I'm sure if you were forced to eat noodles everyday you would feel differently, and as for being homeless, you're saying you really don't care about those people? Is this what society is? People don't care about anyone but themselves obviously, and I'm so sorry I asked a question that in my situation you would ask yourself.

 

[cbg]

You say she is not paying for the roof over your head. So, you are sleeping on the street? In someone else's home? Which?

 

[Proserpina]

apparently everyone on this site is not human. I assume some of these people are also women who get child support, and will not give it to their children. Your point of view is corrupted, and obviously this whole country needs a review on what child support is and how it should be used. I'm sure if you were forced to eat noodles everyday you would feel differently, and as for being homeless, you're saying you really don't care about those people? Is this what society is? People don't care about anyone but themselves obviously, and I'm so sorry I asked a question that in my situation you would ask yourself.

Oh please, get a grip of yourself.

It's not our fault you don't understand the basic concepts of the law, or how society actually works.

Love,

A once-homeless person who lived on LESS than ramen noodles.

 

[sampotter1]

No she's not paying for the roof over my head. It's being foreclosed in 6 months. She actually borrows and steals money from me. Last time I checked, stealing is a illegal. I guess I do understand law a bit. I have a job, and more or less get punished for it. It's my fault there's no food in our "home," and I deserve to get my money taken from me. Being homeless because you're mother is going to kick you out after she gets enough money saved up from your child support is different than being born into poverty, or losing a job. This is pure insanity. If you can't come to realize any point I have to make is right, then I don't find you intelligent in the least.

 

[Proserpina]

This is not the correct forum for whining and/or venting.

The LEGAL REALITY is that Mom can do what she wants with the child support.

If you become homeless, your Daddy can file for custody.

Now, you are free to ask another legal question - but really, the whining has to stop. It's not our fault, sweetheart.

 

[army judge]

No she's not paying for the roof over my head. It's being foreclosed in 6 months. She actually borrows and steals money from me. Last time I checked, stealing is a illegal. I guess I do understand law a bit. I have a job, and more or less get punished for it. It's my fault there's no food in our "home," and I deserve to get my money taken from me. Being homeless because you're mother is going to kick you out after she gets enough money saved up from your child support is different than being born into poverty, or losing a job. This is pure insanity. If you can't come to realize any point I have to make is right, then I don't find you intelligent in the least.

You KNOW nothing.

Let me school you, junior.

That money you earn, none of it is legally yours.

As we've tried to tell you, you're a legal incompetent.

That means you have no rights as a person.

Heck, you're not even a person under the law.

You're a minor.

All of the rights you get, flow through your mother, father, or guardians.


That money you slave away and earn, mom can take every penny of it legally.

Now, ain't that the "sheet"???


Maybe mom will wise up and start taking that paycheck you earn?

Mom, are you reading this?

You have a legal right to everything Junior has or earns, mom.

You can keep feeding him that delicious Raamen "stuff" and take every PENNY he earns!

Junior, ya' feel me now??????????

 

[Proserpina]

Suddenly I'm craving Ramen....

 

[army judge]

Suddenly I'm craving Ramen....

I feel ya', Pro, that Raamen is scrumnptious and very, very cheap!

I see it on sale sometimes as low as 10 cents a package.

So, yummy and fattening!

 

[dee_dub]

Your situation might not be as hopeless as all that, but it's certainly not good.

For one, in some very rare cases, children have been entitled to be the direct recipient of child support payments. I do not know what the law is in Michigan, but in my jurisdiction, the right to benefit from the payment of child support belongs to the child, not the parent. Think of it this way: the courts won't uphold an agreement in which one parent agrees not to pursue a claim for child support; this is because the parent can't bargain away the right to child support, since it's not their right in the first place.

However, that is likely to be of little use to you as long as you live with your mother. Your dad's fulfilling his legal obligations. Your mom is getting child support payments; she's just not using them properly. There is no way, short of the ways described above, to compel her to look after your welfare.

You could go and live with your father. You're seventeen, which means you're old enough that, if your wishes aren't decisive, they will at least be taken into account by a court. If your father is the custodial parent, his child support obligations should cease, although he may need to apply for a court order confirming that.

Good luck.

 

[Proserpina]

There is no change of circumstance - hence no reason for Dad to file for custody. There must be a reason, and THEN a 17 year old's wishes would generally carry considerable weight - but only, again, if there has been a change in circumstance.

And by the time it would be decided, the OP would likely have aged out anyway and the matter would be moot.

The ONLY way this OP would be able to get child support directed to him/herself would be if s/he actually lived outside of the home.

Other than that - it's simply not happening.

 

[dee_dub]

"It has come to my attention that my child support is not being spent on my child and is in fact being squirreled away by the mother for her future use while the child lives in squalor, and the child would prefer to live with me" doesn't get you anywhere? Huh. In my jurisdiction, the paramount consideration is the best interests of the child. Everything else is secondary. The status quo is just the status quo, and if it's no longer beneficial or was premised on false pretenses in the first place (i.e. that the CS will actually be used, y'know, to support the child) then a court would have no hesitation in revisiting the custody order.

 

[Proserpina]

"It has come to my attention that my child support is not being spent on my child and is in fact being squirreled away by the mother for her future use while the child lives in squalor, and the child would prefer to live with me" doesn't get you anywhere? Huh. In my jurisdiction, the paramount consideration is the best interests of the child. Everything else is secondary. The status quo is just the status quo, and if it's no longer beneficial or was premised on false pretenses in the first place (i.e. that the CS will actually be used, y'know, to support the child) then a court would have no hesitation in revisiting the custody order.

Your jurisdiction isn't OP's jurisdiction, for one thing

The child has food, a roof of their head, the utilities are still on...that really is, basically, all that's required. The very basics.

Best interest does not really come into play unless there is a change in circumstance. OP spoke of none.

Status quo DOES carry virtually all of the weight here and since there is no apparent CoC, there is no reason to modify custody. If the conditions are really that bad, social services would have been involved. That is not the case. If they were homeless, Dad would have something. Again that is not the case.

Again though, even if Dad were to file today Mom is likely to fight it and a drawn-out (and expensive) court battle would simply be pointless given OP's age.

The very second OP turns 18, OP can leave and go live with Dad regardless.