Can a child choose which paren'ts house they live at?

[Premium1337]

Hello,

One of my friends in Oregon is 16 years old living with her mother and step-father but would prefer to live with her father. Her mother said that she won't allow for her to live with her father, even though they have joint custody. Does a child have the right to decide which household he or she lives at? What would be the necessary steps to take in order for her to live primarily with her father?

Thanks,
-Premium1337

 

[army judge]

Hello,

One of my friends in Oregon is 16 years old living with her mother and step-father but would prefer to live with her father. Her mother said that she won't allow for her to live with her father, even though they have joint custody. Does a child have the right to decide which household he or she lives at? What would be the necessary steps to take in order for her to live primarily with her father?

Thanks,
-Premium1337

Children have no rights.
Any rights that a child enjoys, flows through their parents or guardians.
In fact, children are not considered persons.
If you aren't a person, no court will hear you.
But, hang on pilgrim, there is a legal remedy for this ailment.
I would suggest the child speak to her father.
She might ask her father about the efficacy of her desire to reside with him.
If the father agrees, HE can petition the court to hear the matter of the child's residency.
The court will schedule a hearing.
Pursuant to the child's advanced teenage years, she could be allowed to speak before the court.
The court, if it is so inclined, might inquire as to the child's WISHES.
If she expresses valid reasons to reside with father and not mother, the court will take them into consideration.

Now you're wondering, what constitutes valid reasons?
Maybe the schools near dad offer a program of education congruent with the child's educational goals.
This curriculum isn't offered at mother's.
Perhaps, mom has too many people at her home.
Maybe, by living with dad she could have her own bedroom.

By living with dad, maybe she'll be closer to her ailing grandmother.
This grandmother she adores, because she helped raise the child when she was young.
She might have a special illness, that can be treated better by living with dad.
It might be better for her health to live in a sunny, warm climate; and not a cold, wintery one.

Get the idea about valid reason?
What is isn't is, that mom makes me be home by 9:00pm, even on the weekends.
But, dad lets me stay out until 2:00am.

Or, dad lives closer to that HOT guy that she's in love with.
Near mom's house, there are no HOT guys.

Dad lets my boyfriend spend the night with me, but mom won't even let him come in the house.
See, that won't cut it!

Valid reasons only, please.
And, it is up to dad to ask the court to hear the matter.
Mom has already made her opinion known about this.
It is eventually up to the judge if she will be heard.
Bottom line, its possible, but highly improbable that her desires will be granted.
But, hey, two years isn't all that long.
It seems like it at 16 years old, but she'll be 18 in no time at all.
Then she can do whatever she desires.
Heck, she'll be a legal person by then, too!

 

[jacksgal]

The other parent would need to petition court for custody

 

[Premium1337]

Could a affidavit of preference be made by the child? I've personally never had to go through any problems, my parents just simply let me decide - which I personally believe that is the way it should be by law, but their are always extenuating circumstances...

So, would the step-father being a controlling drill sergeant, causing stress in the child's life constitute a legitimate reason?

 

[army judge]

Could a affidavit of preference be made by the child? I've personally never had to go through any problems, my parents just simply let me decide - which I personally believe what it should be in the court.

So, would the step-father being a controlling drill sergeant, causing stress in the child's life constitute a legitimate reason?

You don't get it.
Children are not persons.
Only persons have standing to do anything in a court.
Without standing, the court won't even hear her.
She has no voice.
She can bring no case.

Her father, on the other hand, is an adult.
He has standing.
Her father is the only one that can bring such a matter before the court.
She should speak with him about this.
If dad agrees, he is the ONLY one that can petition for this particular change!

 

[Premium1337]

You don't get it.
Children are not persons.
Only persons have standing to do anything in a court.
Without standing, the court won't even hear her.
She has no voice.
She can bring no case.

Her father, on the other hand, is an adult.
He has standing.
Her father is the only one that can bring such a matter before the court.
She should speak with him about this.
If dad agrees, he is the ONLY one that can petition for this particular change!

Yes, I understand your point, but from reading I keep finding that a child has the ability to file an Affidavit of Preference... is this not true?

In most courts across the United States, children who are at a mature age (normally 12-13 years of age or older) and are adamant about living with the other parent can file an Affidavit of Preference – or an official court document stating the child's desire to live with the non-custodial parent. It is then up to the courts to decide what is best for the child – and if the want or desire is genuine, not spiteful or based on wishes of lesser ru

Is all of the above correct?

 

[army judge]

Yes, I understand your point, but from reading I keep finding that a child has the ability to file an Affidavit of Preference... is this not true?



Is all of the above correct?

Why don't you tell her to try it?

Let me know what happens.

Some States allow an "Affidavit of Preference" to be signed by a child to specify a custodial parent or Conservator. Again, the judge is given almost unlimited latitude in how much importance he attaches to the affadavit. Some may disapprove of it, feeling that the child has been unfairly put in a position of having to choose (and perhaps rightfully so).

Generally speaking, there are a few criteria that judges typically consider to one degree or another when adjucating a case where the child or children have strong preferences:

* What is the reason or reasons the child wants to change residences? Is the reason a valid one? Is it a significant factor or issue in the child's life? Some issues have more importance than others, such as schooling or a need for specialized medical care.

* What is the level of stability and reliability of the parent the child wants to live with? If that parent is unstable or unreliable the judge will not likely approve the change. The parent the child wants to live with must be as capable and as able to care for the child as the one the child currently lives with.

* What is the level of the child's social maturity and emotional and intellectual development? Judges will be more receptive to a child who appears able to understand and deal with the changes involved in a modification of the custodial status quo.

* How does each parent support the child's decision? Is the move being made against the wishes of either of the parents? Has the child been pressured, bribed, or manipulated into the move? If a judge senses that there has been any "behind the scenes" interference, it would be extremely unlikely for the move to be allowed.

* Will the move truly serve the child's best interests in the long-term? If a clear and significant benefit from the change in residence cannot be demonstrated, a judge will be unlikely to give approval. The benefit(s) must be obvious and long-term.

* Can the child clearly articulate his or her reasons for desiring to move? The more logically and lucidly a child can explain why they want to change residences, the more likely it is that judge will pay attention to their preference. If the child appears uncertain, confused, or insincere, the judge will ignore or greatly discount what the child says.

In some cases the judge may decide to talk with the child privately "in chambers". Attorneys and parents are normally excluded so that the child can speak freely without fear of displeasing one parent or the other. It is worth noting that what a child tells or relates to a judge in chambers may not necessarily be kept confidential. No one, not even the judge, can guarantee that what a child says will remain confidential; indeed, the child's statement(s) may play an important part in the judge's decision and as such would normally become a matter of record.

Unless circumstances leave no alternative, children should never be asked or required to testify. Even having the child speak privately with the judge should be avoided. The stress that testifying places on a child is immense and unfair- even a 'private' talk with the judge in his chambers is testifying in some way, and the child knows it. No child wants to be placed in the position of being asked to choose one parent over the other. Only when the child has a genuine and voluntarily desire to speak with the judge should it be considered.

* Technically speaking, the child has no legal 'right to choose'. Minors are, by definition, "legal incompetents", which means they are not recognized by the court as being able make legally binding decisions, including decisions regarding their custody.

 

[Premium1337]

Why don't you tell her to try it?

Let me know what happens.

Will do. Is there a special form to file an affidavit of preference...? Cause I can't find any...

 

[Proserpina]

Do you understand that even if an Affidavit of Preference is submitted, that the current NCP will additionally still generally need to show a change in the child's circumstances in order to modify custody?

 

[army judge]

Will do. Is there a special form to file an affidavit of preference...? Cause I can't find any...

I was joking.

Oregon does not endorse or use the "Affidavit of Preference".
As I posted, an "Affidavit of Preference" is used in very few jurisdictions.
A child can never petition the court to be heard.
A child can be heard (if the court desires) if someone with standing (her father in the instant matter) brings an action.

 

[Premium1337]

I was joking.

Oregon does not endorse or use the "Affidavit of Preference".
As I posted, an "Affidavit of Preference" is used in very few jurisdictions.
A child can never petition the court to be heard.
A child can be heard (if the court desires) if someone with standing (her father in the instant matter) brings an action.

Dang. Guess my idea of an affidavit fails. Oh well, I'll just tell her to speak with her father about a petition to the court.

 

[BayState]

Dang. Guess my idea of an affidavit fails. Oh well, I'll just tell her to speak with her father about a petition to the court.

A COC will STILL be needed for a change of custody. Just stay out of other families personal matters.

 

[lonelyinny]

18

Hello,

One of my friends in Oregon is 16 years old living with her mother and step-father but would prefer to live with her father. Her mother said that she won't allow for her to live with her father, even though they have joint custody. Does a child have the right to decide which household he or she lives at? What would be the necessary steps to take in order for her to live primarily with her father?

Thanks,
-Premium1337

she can make that decision when shes 18.

 

[barbie77]

A COC will STILL be needed for a change of custody. Just stay out of other families personal matters.

When will ppl learn that EVERYONE has the right to ask for advice? Even if that person isn't "part of that family" We are NOT here to pass judgment on who should ask and who shouldn't.

I think she should talk to Dad and see what they can do from there. She can try to get heard and if theres good reason for the change then maybe she'll get her way. It's worth a try. And if she gets stuck at moms at least it's only 2 more years and she's "free"