Court ordered 50/50 custody not holding up

S

Sara D.

New Member
Jurisdiction
Pennsylvania
My husband and his ex-girlfriend went to court as she wanted full custody of children. The judge ruled 50/50 custody, week 1 at dads and week 2 at moms.

Now, Mom is "pawning" off children to maternal grandmother at least twice a week on her weeks, sometimes more; she also asks us to watch the kids for her on a continual basis. I have all of these dates documented. Over the last 18 months (the entire 50/50 court ordered duration) we have watched the children an extra 22 days. This is now officially NOT 50/50, as we have them undoubtedly more.

When we have the kids, it is a concrete 7 day cycle at dads, no fluctuation in scheduling. However, when mom has them, the children bounce from her house to grandmoms and sometimes back at our house.

It is getting to the point of us wanting full or majority custody, would this hold up in court?

PS - mom works 2 jobs, one in the evening hence why the kids bounce around so much - but my husband also works 3 jobs, and I as the step mom watch these children majority of the time.
 
Sara D. said:
My husband and his ex-girlfriend went to court as she wanted full custody of children. The judge ruled 50/50 custody, week 1 at dads and week 2 at moms.

Now, Mom is "pawning" off children to maternal grandmother at least twice a week on her weeks, sometimes more; she also asks us to watch the kids for her on a continual basis. I have all of these dates documented. Over the last 18 months (the entire 50/50 court ordered duration) we have watched the children an extra 22 days. This is now officially NOT 50/50, as we have them undoubtedly more.

When we have the kids, it is a concrete 7 day cycle at dads, no fluctuation in scheduling. However, when mom has them, the children bounce from her house to grandmoms and sometimes back at our house.

It is getting to the point of us wanting full or majority custody, would this hold up in court?

PS - mom works 2 jobs, one in the evening hence why the kids bounce around so much - but my husband also works 3 jobs, and I as the step mom watch these children majority of the time.
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Oh, I see...it's fine for your husband to pawn his kids off on you so he can work, but when mom makes arrangements so that she can work, it's a problem.

This is not your legal matter. You ought to back off and let your husband take care of it.
 
Zigner said:
Oh, I see...it's fine for your husband to pawn his kids off on you so he can work, but when mom makes arrangements so that she can work, it's a problem.

This is not your legal matter. You ought to back off and let your husband take care of it.
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Amen!
 
Sara D. said:
we have watched the children an extra 22 days.
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What a gift from Heaven, being allowed to spend 22 EXTRA, BONUS days with your precious, wonderful little darlings.

Sara D. said:
This is now officially NOT 50/50, as we have them undoubtedly more.
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You're WINNING.
Good on ya', mate!
I never grow tired of WINNING.


Sara D. said:
When we have the kids, it is a concrete 7 day cycle at dads, no fluctuation in scheduling.
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When our off spring were children, WE had them 24/7/365 and we enjoyed every minute of it.

Our children were one of life's many blessings.



Sara D. said:
It is getting to the point of us wanting full or majority custody, would this hold up in court?
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You don't need to ask strangers for permission that our constitution already bestows to all of us as a right, the right to a civil jury trial is securely ensconced in our constitution among our amendments (in some cases state constitutions also provide the same right).

Bill of Rights

Sara D. said:
PS - mom works 2 jobs, one in the evening hence why the kids bounce around so much - but my husband also works 3 jobs, and I as the step mom watch these children majority of the time.
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Isn't it wonderful that we live in such a great country that allows us to earn as much money as we desire and work as hard as we wish?
 
Zigner said:
Oh, I see...it's fine for your husband to pawn his kids off on you so he can work, but when mom makes arrangements so that she can work, it's a problem.

This is not your legal matter. You ought to back off and let your husband take care of it.
Click to expand...
TH
Zigner said:
Oh, I see...it's fine for your husband to pawn his kids off on you so he can work, but when mom makes arrangements so that she can work, it's a problem.

This is not your legal matter. You ought to back off and let your husband take care of it.
Click to expand...

Sorry, are you a lawyer? Cause if you don't have legal advice then (REDACTED)

=======================
Watch the profanity, please, thank you for comporting yourself appropriately.

Just one of the mods.....
 
Sara D. said:
So no you're not, just an internet troll. Thanks for your 2 cents that provided absolutely no legal insight. Smh.
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I am not (nor have I ever claimed to be) an attorney. I have actually provided you legal insight, although you do not agree with it. Your husband and the mother of the children are the two legally involved parties. As such, they should be dealing with their own matter. I will (perhaps more clearly) point out again that one is allowed to find care arrangements for their children so that one may work (among other things). That is a legal fact whether one is married, unmarried, or even when there are custody orders in place.
 
Why does it feel like everyone is attacking your post? I don't get it.

So what would be the benefit of having majority custody. Would you pay less in child support, would it be better at tax time? With so many fluctuations that must be difficult in scheduling your life, so having more than 50%, written in an agreement, would provide more stability for the kids and for yourselves. The kids must feel like they're being bounced around and they need security and predictability.

Mom is having to work two jobs, and Dad is working three? Goodness that's rough.

It could be worth a shot, but I believe ultimately it's the judges decision. Sounds like you have good arguments to alter the arrangements, but it's all in the judges hands.
 
Is there anyone who isn't trying to pick a fight with me and has something that's of value to my question? Ps- none of you know me. This is a nutshell of info. No details are outlined here, and to judge me is pitiful as I obviously outlined she works as a props to her. If oh aren't going to give me some info PERTINENT to my questions, please don't reply. Thanks.
 
Sara D. said:
Is there anyone who isn't trying to pick a fight with me and has something that's of value to my question? Ps- none of you know me. This is a nutshell of info. No details are outlined here, and to judge me is pitiful as I obviously outlined she works as a props to her. If oh aren't going to give me some info PERTINENT to my questions, please don't reply. Thanks.
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Based on your posting, you have no standing to change custody.
 
Sara D. said:
This is now officially NOT 50/50, as we have them undoubtedly more.
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Well...in an average stretch of 18 months, there are 547.875 days. We'll round that up to 548, which means that "50/50" would work out to 274 days each. With your husband having the kids for an extra 22 days, that would be 296 to 252, which is 54/46, which is awfully close to "50/50."

Sara D. said:
It is getting to the point of us wanting full or majority custody, would this hold up in court?
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First of all, there's no "us." Second, there is no way the court is going to modify a "50/50 custody" order (much less grant your husband "full custody") simply because, over an 18 month stretch, the actual time division worked out to 54/46 instead of 50/50. Your husband obviously has the kids for a small majority of the time anyway, so what exactly would he hope to gain by a modification of the existing order?

Sara D. said:
they are mine too.
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You can think of them as "yours," but in the eyes of the law, they most definitely are not yours, and you watching the kids so that your husband can work is absolutely no different from the mother's mother watching the kids so that she can work.

Sara D. said:
Is there anyone who isn't trying to pick a fight with me and has something that's of value to my question?
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This quote is from post #11 in the thread. While the information received in 6 of the first 10 posts in the thread (6 of 10 because 4 of the first 10 posts were yours) wasn't Earth-shattering, none of it was wrong. It obviously wasn't what you wanted to hear, but if you consider only favorable responses to be "of value to [your] question," then you're wasting your time and ours.
 
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Sara D. said:
My husband and his ex-girlfriend went to court as she wanted full custody of children. The judge ruled 50/50 custody, week 1 at dads and week 2 at moms.

Now, Mom is "pawning" off children to maternal grandmother at least twice a week on her weeks, sometimes more; she also asks us to watch the kids for her on a continual basis. I have all of these dates documented. Over the last 18 months (the entire 50/50 court ordered duration) we have watched the children an extra 22 days. This is now officially NOT 50/50, as we have them undoubtedly more.

When we have the kids, it is a concrete 7 day cycle at dads, no fluctuation in scheduling. However, when mom has them, the children bounce from her house to grandmoms and sometimes back at our house.

It is getting to the point of us wanting full or majority custody, would this hold up in court?

PS - mom works 2 jobs, one in the evening hence why the kids bounce around so much - but my husband also works 3 jobs, and I as the step mom watch these children majority of the time.
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She can have whomever she wants watch the kids on her parenting time. But you all don't have to take the kids on her time. That's on your husband he can always refuse to take them.

Your husband can try for sole custody and her get a visitation plan but he needs to talk to a lawyer (and legally there's no we - just him). You as the stepmom don't "watch" them nor does your husband. It's called parenting not babysitting. I suggest he talks to a lawyer who would be better versed on possibilities.
 
Sara D. said:
TH


Sorry, are you a lawyer? Cause if you don't have legal advice then (REDACTED)

=======================
Watch the profanity, please, thank you for comporting yourself appropriately.

Just one of the mods.....
Click to expand...

Read the disclaimer on the bottom...
 
Sara D. said:
we are married so I don't label that as him pawning off his kids, they are mine too.
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But you said you "watch" them. When I was a stepparent I sure didn't "watch" my stepkids. I don't watch our daughter either. I parent. Now stepparenting is a slippery slope that's true.
 
Sara D. said:
Is there anyone who isn't trying to pick a fight with me and has something that's of value to my question? Ps- none of you know me. This is a nutshell of info. No details are outlined here, and to judge me is pitiful as I obviously outlined she works as a props to her. If oh aren't going to give me some info PERTINENT to my questions, please don't reply. Thanks.
Click to expand...

You were given info - but if you want LEGAL advice you have to go to a lawyer and pay for it. Or get a free consultation.
 

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