wife and disabled son home financed by wife

K

kathy mcdermott

New Member
Jurisdiction
California
my husbands divorce was final from me in may 2015, prior to marriage his uncle left him a house. The house was left actually to his father and aunt. They signed their interest to my ex. He was not employed and had bad credit so I financed the home using my income and my two sons disability income. My maiden name is on the mortgage and the note but after the loan was signed I put him on the deed in name only (titled "his name" single individual and "mine" single individual) I filed for the divorce because he left me for another woman and I was blamed for a lot of things that i had not done so I let him go. He left me after 13 years and got married a year and not quite a month after he left. Anyway, back to the house. He knew he was on the deed and nothing else and he told me he wanted nothing from me and I could keep it. So I did and for 13 years he never held a job I did and then i became disabled and then my mom spent more than 1/2 of a 100,000.00 savings on improvements to the house. I went to court to get the house post divorce and instead I settled, thinking he would let me see my grandchildren, and only asked him to sign paperwork for the city and habitat for humanity to help improve so many things wrong with the home. The now "wife" refuses to let him sign the house to me and she wants me to take me and my disabled son and walk away from the house with nothing. The house is worth $86,000 and I owe $137,000.00. They have said they dont want the house or money they are happy where they are i want my home??? my son and i are both on SSI so i cannot afford an attorney and the free one at the court house, if you can get to see them, lasts about 5 mins. PLEASE HELP ME SAVE MY HOUSE. right now we have no carpet because of bugs HIS family brought in.
 
The bottom line here is that you and your ex are BOTH owners of the house.

Unless you are willing to buy out his half interest in exchanged for his signature on a quitclaim deed, your remaining option is a "partition action" (google it).
 
adjusterjack said:
The bottom line here is that you and your ex are BOTH owners of the house.

Unless you are willing to buy out his half interest in exchanged for his signature on a quitclaim deed, your remaining option is a "partition action" (google it).
Click to expand...

Plus, you owe $60,000 MORE on the mortgage than the "home" is possibly worth.

That's what is called being UPSIDE DOWN ON THE NOTE!

Your best bet is to file a chapter 7 bankruptcy and walk away from the financial liability of that "home".

To keep that home might cost you $200,000 or MORE.

Think about it, if you could sell it, AFTER you fixed it and paid it off, you'd be lucky to get $90,000. Never going to happen in this day and age, never!!!

Why would you want to throw good money after bad?
 
Your timeline is hard to follow. If both of your names were on the deed at the time of the divorce (the mortgage matters not), ownership should have been addressed in the divorce decree, along with any other joint property. What does your divorce decree say about the house? Did you follow whatever was outlined in the decree?
 
there were no orders on the judgement because my ex told me i could keep the house and when i asked for him to sign a quit claim his new woman said no.
 
Forget blaming the other woman. She can not force him to do anything nor prevent him from doing something. He won't sign the quit claim. If it is joint property, he can decide what to do with it. If he did say you could keep it post divorce, it boggles the mind why you would not have documented that in the divorce settlement and taken care to have it transferred solely in your name at that time. At this point you will have to go to court to see if you can convince a judge that the home he received via inheritance should be signed solely over to you. It sounds like you did this once already and then either withdrew the issues or came to some other agreement. He has nothing to do with your access to grandchildren so I'm not clear why that has anything to do with the house. If you want to see your grandchildren, contact your child and visit.
 
you know you could be a relative of the other woman!!! Elle MD. You have NO IDEA who or how this family is. He had a child with her as teenagers, then left her and was involved with HER MOTHER, The other woman eventually had numerous children, one of which is my ex's cousins child. My ex married a woman because she wouldn't have sex with him unless he married her and his daughter (the one that has my grandchildren) stop talking, seeing, ANYTHING with in regards to her "daddy" until he left her. I watched the other woman, my step daughters mom, send her up and down emotional roller coasters for at least 7 years while she lived with us and I took care of her and her boyfriend and then her son. The other woman has straight up denied that I had any relationship AT ALL with the two children, other than my own, that meant the most to me. My step daughter said to me after taking care of her small family for 7 years, no one but me worked, and then taking care of my granddaughter for most of the first 3 years of her life (she just turned 4), "my kids went to your home to see their grandfather and you just happened to be there". As far as not putting the home on the judgement that was a total screw up because I had never owned a home and ya know i trusted him who knew. I have already proved it to a judge but because I care for my family of 13 years, I thought if I gave a little they might and of course that didn't happen. Just filed for our hearing today and it is real easy because the home was actually left to his father and aunt. His father has told him from the time I bought the house before getting married that if we were ever to split up he wanted 1/2 the house. Well, before my father in law and mom in law moved out he gave me authorization to receive his 1/2 of the interest in his brothers home and he has the will that leaves it to him. my grandchildren belong to HIS DAUGHTER she was my step daughter for 13 years. I worked for many years and my mom also left me quite a lot of money when she moved in when she was sick which was used to improve the home and then also when she passed away. He put little to nothing in this house except dangerous electrical issues. Habitat for Humanity and our City have a program right now to help low income homeowners fix unhealthy things regarding homes. The other woman will not ALLOW him to sign ANYTHING to help improve this house unless she gets something out of it for her or my ex. She wants me to take my son and I and walk away with nothing and you think that is fair? We shall see what happens because I have done all of this including going to court and getting the home originally from his uncles ex wife (after selling a 1 ct diamond ring for a retainer). All of the appliances, carpet etc we paid for by my mother. When things would break she would pay. She left him AND me her and my dad's car and he made me sell it to get his motorcycle out of impound so I lost my portion of that car because of love. I am a woman who loved a large family ALL OF THEM and i have given and given when all they would do was take. I got the load, I pay for the loan, I am on the promisory note and made the mistake of giving him the gift of being on the deed. I will let you know what God decides but I will be waiting years for my grandchildren and i will never give up!!!
 
It is impossible to follow who did what to whom and who all the various pronouns refer to but it is irrelevant.

This woman has no legal standing. She can not force anything to happen nor prevent something from happening. This is between you and your ex only. A judge is not going to care what she wants or thinks at all. Likewise, neither of you can force any other adult, child, cousin, or other, to associate with you. Neither of you can prevent another adult from having a relationship with someone. That has nothing to do with the divorce or house as a legal matter. When a judge gets this case, he or she is not going to even listen to the family saga of who slept with whom and what happened to the cousin's ex's child. Likewise, who worked and how you managed your finances as a married couple are also irrelevant. So is who used to own the house and what is in someone's will. If your mother gifted you appliances and carpet, you are lucky to have her for a mother but is still has no legal impact.

What matters is that you have a house that was his property before marriage (however that came to be). It is officially and legally still joint property. It was not part of the divorce settlement for some unknown reason so what you are left with is dividing a piece of joint property owned with an unrelated individual. You have apparently been paying the mortgage and living in the house for some time. At this point, the chances of a judge just ordering him to give up his interest in the property without compensation or consideration is slim to none. Most likely outcomes are for you to be ordered to buy out his share of the equity and transferring it solely to your name, or the house will be sold and each of you will receive some share of any profit. You stand to gain the larger share as the one living in and maintaining the home for however many years, but it would be unheard of for him to be cut out all together. Partitioning (selling) the property is the most likely outcome, especially if you can not pay out his share.

Your family matters and access to the grandchildren/stepchildren/assorted relatives are beyond the scope of the court no matter what happens with the house.
 
It is impossible to follow who did what to whom and who all the various pronouns refer to but it is irrelevant.

This woman has no legal standing. She can not force anything to happen nor prevent something from happening. This is between you and your ex only. A judge is not going to care what she wants or thinks at all. Likewise, neither of you can force any other adult, child, cousin, or other, to associate with you. Neither of you can prevent another adult from having a relationship with someone. That has nothing to do with the divorce or house as a legal matter. When a judge gets this case, he or she is not going to even listen to the family saga of who slept with whom and what happened to the cousin's ex's child. Likewise, who worked and how you managed your finances as a married couple are also irrelevant. So is who used to own the house and what is in someone's will. If your mother gifted you appliances and carpet, you are lucky to have her for a mother but is still has no legal impact.

What matters is that you have a house that was his property before marriage (however that came to be). It is officially and legally still joint property. It was not part of the divorce settlement for some unknown reason so what you are left with is dividing a piece of joint property owned with an unrelated individual. You have apparently been paying the mortgage and living in the house for some time. At this point, the chances of a judge just ordering him to give up his interest in the property without compensation or consideration is slim to none. Most likely outcomes are for you to be ordered to buy out his share of the equity and transferring it solely to your name, or the house will be sold and each of you will receive some share of any profit. You stand to gain the larger share as the one living in and maintaining the home for however many years, but it would be unheard of for him to be cut out all together. Partitioning (selling) the property is the most likely outcome, especially if you can not pay out his share.

Your family matters and access to the grandchildren/stepchildren/assorted relatives are beyond the scope of the court no matter what happens with the house. No matter what you do or do not do, these folks are free to engage with you or not.
 

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