Two Month Old

[changes2]

My jurisdiction is: New Jersey

I really need help on what to do, my daughter was kicked out of her husband and parents house with the baby cos the son felt he was going to go back to using again and felt like he would hurt them. (She is from Jersey and met him in Virginia last year) So they did it for him and gave her enough money to drive back to Jersey and stay with a Great Aunt...he was adamant about her leaving. They have only known each other for a little over a year, got married in Dec and had the baby in late June. This was only two weeks ago and since then for the first week loves her then not and even came up for about 10 hours last week only to go back stating he can't live with the fact he destroyed his family...he does not work and going to a course to be a medical assistant but still would not be able to afford them living on their own. His parents support him and only put a roof over my daughters head. He then out of the clear blue called DYFS on her, now my daughter may have faults also but she is a very good Mother...Well DYFS cleared her but gave her a list of things to do..one was to file for custody and she did but now he is filing something in Virginia to say he wants his daughter and wants to file custody down there...by the way we have many text messages and emails to her myself and a cousin plus a couple of conversations with a aunt with him stating that he does not want his daughter and/or she isn't his...he has also been calling Dyfs for the past week stating he cx'd ins then called that he didn't and other things, they said his mind is all over the place...we know that he is not right emotionally right now and really needs to see someone and my daughter fears him...Now to the question...what can she do to keep the case here in Jersey. She can't afford to go any where and she would have to take baby with her. She has nobody and car is barely workable? If in the worse case scenario she has to have the case there can she get a public defender and they do the work for her without her there? Would they make her move there? Oh and his father is a CO in the same jail as the town they live and has many connections...please help!

 

[BayState]

My jurisdiction is: New Jersey

I really need help on what to do, my daughter was kicked out of her husband and parents house with the baby cos the son felt he was going to go back to using again and felt like he would hurt them. (She is from Jersey and met him in Virginia last year) So they did it for him and gave her enough money to drive back to Jersey and stay with a Great Aunt...he was adamant about her leaving. They have only known each other for a little over a year, got married in Dec and had the baby in late June. This was only two weeks ago and since then for the first week loves her then not and even came up for about 10 hours last week only to go back stating he can't live with the fact he destroyed his family...he does not work and going to a course to be a medical assistant but still would not be able to afford them living on their own. His parents support him and only put a roof over my daughters head. He then out of the clear blue called DYFS on her, now my daughter may have faults also but she is a very good Mother...Well DYFS cleared her but gave her a list of things to do..one was to file for custody and she did but now he is filing something in Virginia to say he wants his daughter and wants to file custody down there...by the way we have many text messages and emails to her myself and a cousin plus a couple of conversations with a aunt with him stating that he does not want his daughter and/or she isn't his...he has also been calling Dyfs for the past week stating he cx'd ins then called that he didn't and other things, they said his mind is all over the place...we know that he is not right emotionally right now and really needs to see someone and my daughter fears him...Now to the question...what can she do to keep the case here in Jersey. She can't afford to go any where and she would have to take baby with her. She has nobody and car is barely workable? If in the worse case scenario she has to have the case there can she get a public defender and they do the work for her without her there? Would they make her move there? Oh and his father is a CO in the same jail as the town they live and has many connections...please help!

Baby was born in Va. and that is the state where jurisdiction will/should be.

 

[changes2]

two months

First thank you for your reply but the answer you gave is what I thought could happen but my real question was if she would be forced to go there for the hearing or can she do it through a public defender/lawyer and would she be made to move there if the judge states so with no money or a place to live...Have you ever heard of a judge taking a child away from a parent at such a young age? Can she get emergency custody to override this "Home state" law? Thanks again..oh and I am new to this site so if I am missing something please forgive me...

 

[BayState]

First thank you for your reply but the answer you gave is what I thought could happen but my real question was if she would be forced to go there for the hearing or can she do it through a public defender/lawyer andwith no money or a place to live...Have you ever heard of a judge taking a child away from a parent at such a young age? Can she get emergency custody to override this "Home state" law? Thanks again..oh and I am new to this site so if I am missing something please forgive me...

if she would be forced to go there for the hearing

She could hire an attorney to represent herself or request a telephone appearance. I would suggest hiring an attorney AND personally being
at the hearing.

would she be made to move there if the judge states so

The Judge isn't going to "force" her to move back...But he may ORDER the child to be returned to the state.

no money or a place to live

She needs to get a job.

Have you ever heard of a judge taking a child away from a parent at such a young age?

Interesting...That is exactly what the mother did. She took the child away from his parent.

Can she get emergency custody to override this "Home state" law?

No. There is no emergency. It is called "jurisdiction" and no she can't play games with the court for her own convenience. She should have taken care of this before moving the child to another state without the fathers or the courts permission.

 

[changes2]

Obviously you did not read the original posting....she was kicked out with no where to go and given enough money to come to jersey and followed to make sure she crossed the state line...she was devastated and only found my aunt to take her in at the last minute...they were to move up here in January after he got a job but has not worked more than 15 hrs a week when they met and hasn't worked at all since February...she gets 35 dollars a week and that is what supported her from an outside source, his parents paid for his upkeep...She just had the baby and how was she going to work in a state where she has noone but her husband and family who threw her and baby out on the streets...on second thought please don't offer advise unless you read the whole story!...I thought I was on a site that would give good advise and wasn't expecting to hear sarcasm...

 

[BayState]

Could someone other than Bay state answer or give me any advise, I have read some of his/her answers to others and he/she is very negative..he/she first did not give advise on my question and then when he did he/she clearly did not read all the specifics...if someone could please read my original post I would greatly appreciate any advise...not some negative criticism..thanks

I most certainly did read the "specifics". I gave legally accurate advice. I also gave realistic, objective advice. If you just wanted "positive" advice...Pay an attorney to say what you want to hear.

Legally the child has two parents and one of those parents does not have the unilateral right to move the child out of state. Dad has a right to request the child's return to the legal residence. Period. If he ends up with custody depends on the facts/evidence presented. Since your daughter was not...savvy... enough to deal with this BEFORE leaving with the child, I recommend she hire (try legal aid) an attorney to deal with the mess she created. I do not recommend that she not attend this hearing.

 

[changes2]

Okay if you read the whole message then you would have read that she was kicked out by her husband and told never to return upon which he and parents gave her money to send her and baby back to Jersey the same night...where did she have the time to do anything...he called her the next day to say he was sorry but he will come live in Jersey but in that same week changed his mind a couple of time with also stating he did not think the child was even his..he also called Dyfs in Jersey the next week when he couldn't contact her in one day not even considering that the child may be put into the system..he of course then apologized for that and Dyfs who also stated that there is something not right with him and also gave her specific guidelines to follow including filing for custody in Jersey, when he got wind of this he is going to retaliate by trying to get the court in Virginia to have jurisdiction..he is still as we speak threatening her with legal actions if she doesn't come back to him cos he now after throwing her out on the streets with the baby knows he cannot afford to come here and states his parents who do not like her will take her back in even after he has stated he wanted to harm the baby...he has a gun felony from the past and when I stated my daughter feared him this is one of the reasons. Most of this information was posted in the original post...she did not leave him, she loves him but knows he is not right...she just had the baby how can she have gotten a job, he is not even working! So how can you state you read the whole message! And you did make it out to say she took the baby from him!

 

[changes2]

Really so any man can throw his wife and child out and tell her to go back to Jersey cos he may hurt them because he is not right and then harass them and try to manipulate them all with documentation to prove all of this and then compromise his daughter by calling Dyfs with a gun felony in the past and still my daughter did something wrong..oh did I mention that she has to leave the same night and given money to go back with the help of his parents...and that she has no family down there and that he doesn't even think the child is his...I think we will go with an emergency custody hearing, but you are the professional and know the law..thanks

 

[changes2]

I've tried to reply to the last post made on this subject twice since last night and it does not show...has it been closed? Especially because the last statement/advise still is contradictory of the original post and that if I was not clear in the original post as to my daughter being thrown out of the house with baby with no where to go late at night by husband and parents, and husband is being vindictive and intimidating plus so much more the past couple of weeks...I was not looking for a positive answer just one that should if someone would have read it more carefully before replying such as her taking the child out of state without permission when in fact as mentioned he threw her out and parents actually paid her gas and tolls to get out of state with no where to go.

 

[changes2]

Special advise

I have asked for a few weeks over and over again to please have this thread removed because I did not know or was aware that you can pull it up in a google search or yahoo....I am not sure that the people that are posting there questions on here are aware of this and especially because it deals with the lives of children...I mentioned that this is a serious matter and still no response, nothing...DO the people also know that there is no phone number to even call just to file a ticket and trust me I have at least 4-5 tickets still open...so to all the people out there that can read this be careful...do not use any name or login that may be pulled in any search, it does not have to be on here. It may be too late for my daughter but please protect yourselves against this site...

 

[uSERFRIENDLY]

DO the people also know that there is no phone number to even call just to file a ticket and trust me I have at least 4-5 tickets still open...so to all the people out there that can read this be careful...do not use any name or login that may be pulled in any search, it does not have to be on here. It may be too late for my daughter but please protect yourselves against this site...





You shouldnt have wrote this. Acually, you shouldnt have wrote any of that. it seems you and your daughter are trying to manipulate the system.
Unfortunatley it doesnt work like that. And since you know so much about the law, why are you on this site? - legal aide Slap willie GA

 

[uSERFRIENDLY]

My jurisdiction is: New Jersey



...he does not work and going to a course to be a medical assistant but still would not be able to afford them living on their own. His parents support him and only put a roof over my daughters head.




your daughter is an adult, what were the parents supposed to do either way, buy her a car and a home? Pay her to Live their? They Gave her a place to stay! Not many people do that, if they know their child is as you make it out to be "crazy". After reading all your post, if she only knew him for a year and he is so crazy why was she with him and why did she have a baby with him? Thats her fault if thats the case. Also, We know many pregnant women who work. Many parents support their child regaurdless of age givin decency 18-29 in some cases,, if they are in college, or any dicipline If they think Child is worth it. Why would you Try To Argue that? Medical assistants usually extern for hire...its usually the only way to Work in the health care profession. And, Medical assistants make up to 16 an hour depending on training and or site location of hire And if he gets paramedic training..usaully 6 months and externing too..he could make up to a 45000 50000 a year salary....thats enough to support a family givin both parents work or not, as normal families usually do? How old is your daughter? "They only put A roof over her head"?....thats more than most would do regaurdless....what do you expect?? It sounds like you guys are the ones being manipulative and it sounds like the father is on the right path. Who doesnt have "issues" lady? He is the father regaurdless and if he can proove in court he is sane which is what will happen because of your allegations, What case do you have? You really need to think, Is this Really worth a fight because if all you have to go on is he is a lunatic and it turns out he isnt , A lawyer, is only going to string you along for the money..because no logical lawyer would try to make an idiot of him/herself with this case. Jurisdiction is were the child was born and stayed up to six months. period. Filing emer custody will only make your case uglier. Good luck, however Your post really sounds crazy and doesnt make logical legal sence.... Givin only a few possible out comes.

 

[uSERFRIENDLY]

B. Do Not Disclose Personal or Confidential Information. Nothing submitted to our web site or service is treated as confidential. Communications to and from this web site are not secure and subject to the same risks of interception and security that exists on the Internet. It is in your best interests not to disclose any privileged, confidential or other valuable private information when using our web site and service. This includes the names of people, business, their private personal data and the like. Such information should only be disclosed outside the scope of this web site and service, for example, such as after signing a legal retainer with an attorney and thus being protected by the attorney-client privilege

 

[jharris352]

Calm down it's not as bad as you might think

Lizzy,

First, don't listen to BayState. He sounds like he has an ax to grind and he isn't right about jurisdiction or custody.

When her husband threw her out, if that is what occurred, he abandoned her and the child. She has full custody of the child just like he does and she moved with the child. She can do that especially if he abandons her.

Jurisdiction has NOTHING to do with where the child was born. However, there may be a problem with her filing for a divorce and to establish a custody order until she has lived in Jersey for 6 months. Usually you must establish residency for 6 months before filing in that states courts.

She needs to file first. If she has not been served, don't worry about it. He has to serve her for the case to be active. She first needs a lawyer in NJ.

Don't tell me she can't afford one. Get one. She needs one badly.

 

[uSERFRIENDLY]

Sir this is a PUBLIC Forum. Anyone can say write or read what -ever they want to.

Postings in the Forums, Message Boards, Guides and any other areas of and through our web site are for educational and information purposes only.

 

[jharris352]

Even in a public forum, if it can be determined that you are following and harassing your ex you can be convicted of stalking. Sir.