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Somebody Please Help Us

Discussion in 'Child Custody & Visitation' started by aw346a, Dec 28, 2018.

  1. aw346a

    aw346a Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I am so unsure on what to do. I really need some help.

    My daughter is 5 1/2 months old. She is the light of my life, my first child, she is everything to me. Her father is someone I am very afraid of. He doesn't make sense to me, why he does the things he does. I am 21 years old and he is 20. We met in high school, but we live an hour away from each other. I'm a college student in management, so I don't have any legal knowledge. He is an industrial janitor, essentially, and he can afford his lawyer, which he has. I'm not able to afford a lawyer and the legal assistance programs in my area keep ignoring me.

    My relationship with him has been abusive in ways I couldn't have ever imagined. He was and still is in complete control of my life and it is terrifying. I have tried so hard to get away from him. He has hurt me physically several times. If I can I will attach and image of the most recent damage, from September, because I wouldn't stop crying about missing my two month old baby after he kept me from her for almost two days. (I'm usually always with her, my classes are online now so I'm always home with her)

    Screenshot_20181228-062550.png

    I'll get to the jist of the story here as best I can. We had broken up. He had a new girlfriend. I didn't know about her. He proposed marriage. We got together. I found out about his girlfriend and left. Then I found out I was pregnant.

    When I was five months along a lawyer told him he had a charge of domestic battery on a pregnant woman. He contacted me, asking if I was pregnant with his child. I'm a really honest person, it's kind of a moral code I have, so I told him I was in fact five months pregnant. He was still with his girlfriend but insisted he was going to be with me. I told him that wasn't what I wanted.

    There was a bit of petty drama when he came back around, and then he was gone again for a while with his other girlfriend. My car was broken down, and about a month and a half before my due date I found him outside my house taking the tires off my car to fix my brakes that had welded together the last time I saw him. We have a no trespass order to our house but the police don't enforce it much because by the time we call, he is long gone.

    He ended up moving into my next door neighbors house, renting the basement, which I guess was completely legal for him to do. He was there for the birth of his child and thus signed the birth certificate. He was escorted out by hospital security a few hours later, ranting about how I refused to have sex with him and getting really worked up. I had to lock myself in the hospital bathroom to hide from him and called home, just a few hours after giving birth. My family notified the hospital about what was happening there and I hid in the bathroom until security showed up. Thankfully my daughter was in the nursery. I have always made sure she wasn't exposed to those things.

    A social worker talked to us then. She told us we couldn't have any more domestic cases or we would lose our daughter.

    She was born in July. September was the last straw. He completely blackened my eye, it was swollen shut entirely at first. He didn't want me to go home and he threatened me and my families lives if I told the police. He has an extensive and violent criminal history, but no convictions. I don't know how or why. I ended up going to the hospital because I needed a note for school (takes about 3x the amount of time to do schoolwork with one eye I found out)

    The night he blackened my eye I was trying to get him to leave, as I so often did. All we did was argue. All the time. When he was here (1 month old baby) she was fussing because she needed her diaper changed and I had stepped out of the room. When I came back in my grandma was in there and he was holding her arms down while she fussed and said to my grandma "she has to learn!" My grandma asked "has to learn what?" and he just walked out of the room very angry. He would sit in my front yard all day every day because he wasn't allowed inside after that (and an incident of him choking me out inside the house that happened around the same time). He would drive my car to and from work (3rd shift). I wanted him to leave and he didn't want to leave. I would tell him that I wasn't in love with him, that I didn't want to be with him, and that I was afraid of him. He would snap and tell me I was lying. That night I said to him "even if we aren't together, we need to be civil for our daughters sake." he replied "f**k that I'm going to make your life a living h*ll."

    And he has.

    The police told me that if I didn't file an order of protection against him that they would have to take my daughter from me for her own safety. So I did file for one. This infuriated him.

    After the o.p was filed, he broke it multiple times. I reported it, and nothing was ever done. They said they'd have to investigate, that they weren't sure if anyone would get around to it, and they didn't. I filed another one, which he also broke.

    I received a court summons, in October I believe.

    I was sent to mediation, and the lawyer who worked as the mediator not only called me a b**ch, but called the father a dumba**. I was mortified. He told me that if he were the guardian ad litem, he would take my daughter from me and give her to the father completely with no visitation for me. On the basis of police reports from over two years ago, questioning my mental stability when I was in the care of an overzealous psychiatrist who had me on way way way too many medications. (I have some domestic charges from this period in my life, mostly because I was always so panicked whenever we argued, and he would lie about what happened)

    After three hours of mediation, the lawyer had an agreement written up that the father would have primary custody, and I would have two less days than him a month. When I told the lawyer I didn't want to sign it he began to get angry and told me to just sign it and it could be modified later. Then he told me I would need a lawyer to do that. The judge also told me I need to get a lawyer. I have tried and I keep trying and I keep being ignored. I will continue to try.

    I ended up signing that agreement against my better judgment. Then I went to see a psychologist for a psych eval, and I was cleared. I took that into court to dispute the allegations that the agreement was founded on, and the judge dismissed the original parenting agreement that we had signed at mediation.

    The guardian ad litem claims to have met with me multiple times, but I haven't ever received a phone call or spoken with her outside of court. His lawyer insisted that the father get three days a week with her and we went back and forth one what days and what times at least 15 times. They both agreed that the father should have time alone with his daughter. I contested, and the judge agreed with them.

    He sat there and lied in court, about so so many things. I even have papers that prove he was lying but the judge said he wasn't going to look at them! I brought a stack of police reports involving him, so many that they wouldn't even fit in the manila folder I had! And that was just from three departments in the area. I didn't even get all the ones I needed in time. Armed robbery, domestics, forgery, falsifying id, dui, evading police, and more. The judge wouldn't even look at them.

    Eventually, after three more hours of being in court. They dropped my order of protection, and gave the father tues, thurs, sat, from 9-5.

    This was ten days ago.

    My baby, when she is home and up until now, is absolutely perfect. She barely fusses, she laughs and plays all the time, she relaxes when she's supposed to. She loves her swing, of course, and all of her toys. Our shared room is almost entirely hers, I have a twin sized bed and thats pretty much it. Everything else in her room is pink and baby oriented. (I am also on a waiting list to have my own two bedroom apartment right up the road from my family, hopefully by march) We only watch appropriate cartoons. I live with my grandmother, and my mother stays here too now, so there are three generations of mothers looking after her here. She tells us when her diaper needs changed and she doesn't even cry, she just makes this noise and I know it means diaper. She doesn't even have to tell me when she's hungry because I know when and how much to feed her.

    My daughter hasn't ever had so much as a diaper rash or a runny nose. She sleeps through the night soundly, and wakes happy as can be. She cuddles, she plays, she laughs, and she hardly ever fusses. She really is the perfect baby.

    In these past 10 days, I have noticed such a drastic change. She isn't sleeping through the night like she used to and she always wants to sleep in her swing and not her bed

    She comes home in tears, in different clothes because she poops and pukes all over herself, in a dirty diaper and clearly underfed. Sometimes covered in sweat or with gunk(?) in her hair.

    In those ten days, he has failed so tremendously I am heartbroken about my daughter. The first day I dropped her off they let me come inside but I wasn't allowed in the room where he claimed to keep all of her stuff. All I saw was a crib, without a mattress, in a 13 year old boys room (his brother, there are 8 people in their two bedroom house, his sisters live in blanket forts in the basement) which he said the crib was for my daughter. They have this super angry dog that is stuck in his kennel 24/7, eats sleeps and poops in his kennel with a blanket over it. He just barks all the time. He bit me once. I didn't see anything that she needed there, no bottles, no clothes, no diapers, no toys. There was the crib in the boys room and a high chair in the kitchen. I reported it to child services and they said they don't have enough to investigate.

    He doesn't have diapers for her so I send diapers. He doesn't feed her right so I send pre-portioned food. I send extra clothes, blankets, toys, food, dishes, medicine, just so that he has everything he needs to take care of her. I even offered to buy another swing so he would have one for her but he keeps telling me he has one and just coming up with excuses as to why it's not there. I think I'm going to buy an extra anyway.

    He tries to tell me that somehow I am the one causing his difficulty with her. They won't let me help they don't listen to my advice. He is convinced his girlfriend is a "baby expert" (his words) and that she knows best. He told me he is going to convince my daughter his girlfriend is her new mom. She is also pregnant with his second child.

    I have asked him why he isn't putting our daughters needs first. I have told him how this is effecting her. I have asked him to just leave us alone, I have done everything I possibly know how to do.

    No institution I have contacted has been able to help. The police are aware of the situation. The center for prevention of abuse knows, countless counselors know, my doctor knows, my family knows, my friends know about all of this. I have reached out and I have tried to get help on this situation since the first time he ever put hands on me. Nothing has ever been done. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't sleep at night, I can't sleep at all. This is really tearing me up and I feel so defeated.

    Someone please help us. There has to be something I can do to protect my daughter.
     
  2. mightymoose

    mightymoose Moderator

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    I doubt anyone is going to read all of that. You might try condensing it to a couple specific questions.

    From what I did read it seems you are not married. If there is no court order awarding him custody or visitation of the child then he is not entitled to it. You do not have to make the child available to him.

    If he has been violent then you need to report those incidents to law enforcement and obtain a restraining order.

    Cease all contact with him. No calls, texts... nothing. If you need to serve him legal documents you can have someone do it on your behalf. The court will have that information. If he makes threats or continues to be violent toward you, or if he ever takes your child without permission, immediately report to the police.
     
    Michael Wechsler likes this.
  3. Michael Wechsler

    Michael Wechsler Administrator Staff Member

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    I'm sorry to hear about your situation and have a great deal of sympathy for your child, who unfortunately for her cannot choose her own living situation.

    I'm going to recommend that you delete (or request the site delete) your avatar and photo attachment. Often sharing these personally identifiable items in public is not a good idea, even if you have an anonymous user name.

    As to your problems, they are far beyond the scope of this forum. Just being a listener, it seems we're missing a huge part of the story. The recommendation of primary custody with the father - someone who was living in a basement and then with numerous other people in a 2 bedroom home (and has a second child on the way with another girlfriend) - seems extremely unusual. There is likely more here than we know and best not to share it here.

    Given his history of abuse it's difficult for me to understand why you'd accept his marriage proposal unless you were hoping that somehow he'd change his ways because of your child together. And he is going to have another child with a different girlfriend. This doesn't appear as if it is going to have a mutually compatible ending.

    @mightymoose seems to provide sensible thoughts. I don't know how this child is supported nor do I know how both of you intend to make this happen. But you need to figure out exactly how you want things to proceed permanently and a plan to make for an acceptable home for your child. If you can't be practical and realistic about your situation, you'll find people less than receptive to you - you need to accept that the situation and the people involved are who they are and not assume they are or can be made to change.

    The court will decide what is ultimately in the best interests of the child if the parents cannot figure it out between themselves. Unfortunately, it seems often about making the best of a difficult situation. Others may have more useful suggestions other than the observation I am providing. Best of luck to you and your child.
     
  4. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

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    You are best served contacting a Lawyer many will grant a "free" consultation. during this meeting you can get some advice on how to deal with courts. You need to file abuse charges as well. If the is no marriage its very likely "Dad" has no real parental rights so you have no obligation to see him or take child to him. In mean time I also suggest a "parenting" forum (hosted by thelaw.com) for non legal advice on your situation. At this other forum you can find other parents who may gone through similar situations and find out how they dealt with it and results. Parent Nook Forums - Index page I also agree that you should remove picture for your own protection
     
  5. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    I read through as much as I could but that's really long and a lot of information isn't necessary.

    So what is the actual custody arrangement right now? You said the original one that gave him primary custody the judge threw out. Who has custody - legal and/or physical? Is it joint? Is it sole for you or him? It sounds like he has a visitation order at the very least and that you have primary custody but it's hard to tell.

    Why did the judge dismiss the protection order? That seems extremely rare for a judge to do unless the victim asks for it to be dropped. Judges usually do not just drop them.

    I am a survivor of domestic violence. My ex husband beat me a few times and the last time nearly strangled me unconscious while our four month old was in the other room. I get it. I've been there. If you need someone to talk to you can private message me.

    But you need to see about a lawyer. At most find one who does free consultations. Most do - find a few. Talk to them and see if someone will take you on. Some might work out payment options with you based on your situation. I know that three months before I finally filed for divorce I talked to a few lawyers. One of them said he'd waive the consultation fee after I told him about the abuse. I didn't go with any of them and ended up with a lawyer who, at the time, worked from home so payment wasn't too bad. Luckily my ex husband didn't show up for court so I got sole custody and parenting time at my discretion.

    You need help from someone who knows how to navigate the legal waters. Did he establish his paternity? It seems like he must have if he got visitation. When your child was born did he sign a voluntary acknowledgement of paternity? That's one way to establish paternity in Illinois and you said he signed the birth certificate so wondering if they had him sign that at the hospital too because if so, he has parental rights. If not, that might be useful.

    I highly recommend filing for another protection order and maybe you'll get a different judge. I filed one against my ex husband (before we were married) and it got approved for a year. The only way it got dropped is that I talked to victim witness at the courthouse who talked to the judge and told them I was not being coerced, etc and the judge dropped it. Then, when my ex went to jail for beating me the last time, I had a temporary order but never got the permanent but the judge in his case ordered no contact between us for the duration of the case. That got dropped after a month of victim witness talking to him. But that was me asking for it - so I find it odd yours got dropped if you didn't ask for it to be.

    You definitely need a lawyer and a protection order. You can't do this one on your own and if you have proof your daughter is in danger when with him, don't let him take her. Even on his days - if he threatens to take you back to court tell him go ahead. But be sure you have evidence.
     
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  6. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    If you search "illinois family law attorneys free consultation" you'll get a bunch of results. I don't know where you live but try that and see which ones are closest to you and call them up. Keep contacting lawyers until you find one that will help. Explain the situation as coherently as possible.
     
  7. aw346a

    aw346a Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Thank you all for your responses!

    I bolded and underlined the most important parts. I can condense it to just those parts.
    It won't let me edit the post any more tho so maybe I'll just have to repost or something.

    I tried to be as clear as possible while still giving the whole story and disclosing everything I can. I didn't want just the generic answers of "call cps, call the police, etc" because I have and nothing has ever been done to stop him from controlling my life.

    It really should be as simple as "hes an abusive man and doesn't need to have an infant in his sole care" but for some reason it is not.

    The order of protection was dropped because there wasn't sufficient evidence. He locked me out of my phone which had all the evidence I need on it.

    The judge said that we both had equal cases and in orders of protection, the person who filed has to have more evidence than the defendant. He is the only family-case judge in our courthouse. He covers both the orders of protection, and the custody cases.

    The father has court ordered visitation now. He signed the birth certificate and the judge said that in illinois thats all the proof they need for paternity.

    I don't think I have proof she is in danger per say, just my messages to him telling him my concerns. She just isnt being cared for properly at all.

    I've already reached out to cps, the police, and witness services.

    The guardian ad litem told me that if I keep my daughter instead of giving her to him, that I will be charged with kidnapping.

    I will look into free consultations rather than free lawyer services, thank you.
     
  8. aw346a

    aw346a Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Also I'm not seeing any way to delete this thread, either. Can anyone tell me if and how I would do that?
     
  9. mightymoose

    mightymoose Moderator

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    This is entirely up to you. Nobody can make you do anything. You, and only you, control the things which you do.
     
  10. mightymoose

    mightymoose Moderator

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    This implies you have not reported the abuse to police. Although it is late, if it happened within the last year you can still report it, and should. Although your injuries have surely healed, a good police investigation may result in new information to use against him. Before you go to police I suggest you make contact at a shelter for victims of domestic violence. They will likely have someone available to offer support and help you through the process. There are resources available to you if you are willing to accept them.

    That is not true, but it would be a violation of a court order and you don't want that either. Since an order does exist I suggest you follow it EXACTLY. Do not deviate from it for any reason or allow him to do so.
     
  11. aw346a

    aw346a Law Topic Starter New Member

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    The abuse /has/ been reported to the police, all of it. I have police reports upon police reports. He comes up with a self-defense theory like he always does, and the judge dismissed it and wouldn't even look at the police reports I gathered. I have spoken with the center for prevention of abuse and have continued to do so throughout this entire situation since september. He was arrested on multiple charges of domestic violence but was not ever convicted, and thats why the judge dismissed it. I speak with the police, and the center for prevention of abuse almost weekly. I accept the resources I have, but like I said, nothing has been done.

    I do follow the court order, I'm not going to lose my child to someone who can't even care for her properly.

    I can control MY actions, and I am doing an upstanding job on my part with being organized and taking care of my child impeccably. I cannot control his, the police, or the courts actions and those are my issues. The court CAN force me to do things, and they are. The police CAN neglect to act, and they are. None of those things are in my control, and that is an awful feeling.

    I'm not sure what you mean by this is entirely up to me? This is a situation involving three people, three lawyers, four counselors, and at least two institutions. Nothing about this is entirely up to me, if it were, my daughter would be at home, safe and well cared for.

    I will reiterate, the court CAN force me to do things, and they are.

    I'm not the type of person to shirk off my actions at all, don't get me wrong. I take responsibility for the things I do and don't do. I just know what I am and what I am not capable of in this situation. I cannot overturn a judges decision single-handedly, and I really don't understand how this is entirely up to me.
     
  12. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    That's weird he said all they need for paternity is a signed birth certificate because that's not on the Illinois. gov website about paternity.

    You would not be charged with kidnapping if you refused his court ordered visitation that would be contempt of the court order. Who are these people where you live?

    There really are no free lawyer services except perhaps legal aid. A free consultation is usually only 30 minutes. Maybe an hour but after that you have to pay to retain that lawyer's services. If you have legal aid where you live you could try starting there to get some advice and then reach out to private attorneys if you feel the need but I think you need a lawyer. I think you're getting jerked around a bit.

    To delete the thread I think an admin has to delete it.
     
  13. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    It won't do shit to report it now and they probably won't investigate it. I called the police one day after my ex assaulted me the first time. One day. When I went to talk to the female police officer who took my call she assured me they would have him in jail by the weekend. Nope. They sent two officers to go talk to him after I gave them my statement, the officer took photos of my bruises and black eye and he lied to them. Told them a completely made up bullshit story about what happened. Plus it happened in a hotel room and I checked out leaving him there after he passed out and I felt I could get away. I almost stopped and told the clerk at the desk to call the police but I just wanted to get away and I went 2 hours to my dad's house. My dad wanted to kill him. But they didn't arrest him at all for that incident because it turned into he said/she said - after only one day waiting to report. So I doubt they will find any evidence a year after the fact in this case and it will just get dropped. I ended up dropping it with the police in the first case because it was two months of bullshit. First - the female officer was believing my ex and meeting him off duty to talk about the case and telling him she didn't think he was capable of it. I told victim witness I didn't want to keep going if I wasn't believed and she was doing this. The police chief then talked to me and then they reassigned a male detective to the case. He tried his best and they tried to get my ex into take polygraph but I knew he wouldn't and never admit it. So I finally just dropped the PO when his family said he was in treatment and shit and then I told the detective I was done. He said they could keep investigating without me but I was the only witness. It was all he said/she said. They looked at camera footage in the hotel but the hotel room was cleaned by the time they got to it. So I knew it was never going to get prosecuted.

    It sounds like she has utilized a lot of the services out there. Not all domestic violence shelters have the proper advocates. Hell the last time my ex assaulted me and he went to jail and yeah i was stupid to stay with him but the domestic violence advocates at Family Advocacy were awful. Awful. First one lectured me for not getting medical help after he strangled me. I didn't know there are women who have died after being strangled days later because it nerves can get pinched. She went off on me - no support. Just criticized me. Then when I had to clear I had to go to them to sign off behavioral health and I told the lady I was staying with him. I thought it was the right decision at the time. She lectured me - and when a friend of mine went to them after her husband (now ex) assaulted her and threw hot coffee on her she said they blamed her. When she said she shut off her debit cards (because he fled the MPs and fled base and no one could find him for awhile after that) the DVA told her she was abusing HIM for shutting off the debit cards. So sometimes you get shitty advocates. Sometimes you don't. And sometimes the law can't help because there's not enough evidence to prove beyond a reasonable doubt. Even if you report right away. She's not to blame here - yes she is the only one who can let someone control her but abusers are highly manipulative.
     
  14. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    You just need to find a lawyer who will help you and can help - and will work with you on payment. It might take talking to several lawyers. There are a few out there who have some empathy.

    It sounds like you've used all resources available and sometimes the system fails. Sometimes people in the system fail. I've been there. If you can PM me go ahead if you need someone to talk to. I got lucky with my ex being a lazy ass and not coming to court so it's my discretion when he sees her. He hasn't seen our daughter since Labor Day last year - he relapsed again shortly after that and was in jail for 13 months til Thanksgiving. And he'll probably go back sooner rather than later based on past history.

    It does suck right now. Do what you have to do but honestly I would probably file complaints against the judge and GAL because they seem to have some really messed up views on how things work. Especially telling you that you'd be kidnapping if you didn't let your ex have his visitation.
     
  15. mightymoose

    mightymoose Moderator

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    Agreed, lack of evidence at this point, however suspects have been known to say some really stupid things while attempting to explain their version of the story. The paper trail on criminal acts has to start somewhere. There is more to it than just restraining orders.
     
  16. ElleMD

    ElleMD Well-Known Member

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    Here's the thing. You made a HUGE mistake creating a child with this person and then telling Mr. Abusive this was is child after you had gotten away. Moral code is all well and good but your duty to your child should be paramount. At this point, you have a court order that you must abide by. Random offenses by him simply aren't relevant to paternity rights. Even crappy human beings retain parental rights unless and until they prove that they are a danger to the actual child to the satisfaction of a judge. Forging checks and having arrests or report of DV without convictions doesn't cut it. Neither does having a less than ideal living situation. Your situation isn't "ideal" either in that you are reliant of others for support. That your family might be nicer or more well off than his doesn't negate parental rights. If there are signs of abuse toward the child, report them immediately to CPS and get them documented by a doctor if the signs are physical. A baby crying after being with a new person or someone other than the mother is not sufficient to remove custody or visitation. The bar for retaining parental rights are really low and judges are very hesitant to revoke it, especially after just a few months.

    The judge already knows you two can't get along as if you could you would be together and never grace the courtroom. The fact is the judge will look at it as you chose this guy to be the father of this child just a year or so ago. You've had an on again, off again relationship, whether that was advisable or not isn't for the judge to sort out. To an outsider, it *sounds* like using the child as revenge for a relationship gone wrong and judges hear that sort of thing day in and day out. In your case your fears may be justified and he might have been a horrible boyfriend but just a year ago you saw fit to create a child with him, in spite of the abuse and his lengthy rap sheet. Less than six months ago you were engaged and he was there to establish paternity. The only difference between now and then is you are no longer a couple. Family court isn't the place to adjudicate DV cases (or various criminal charges) even if it is the same judge. The only thing at issue is the rights of the father to this child. This guy is obviously a bad dude and contact with him ought to be limited to what is necessary to handle child care. If necessary, request such things as a neutral drop off and pick up site. Some states even have a way to use a mediator to handle communication between parents.

    If this guy is a janitor he isn't exactly rolling in dough for legal fees. If you are in school, check with the college to see if they offer legal services to students (most do). Check with local law schools or legal aid organizations, or look into asking family for help with hiring a lawyer. You likely can't get parental rights removed (yet) but you can put measures in place to protect yourself and limit contact. I'm not unsympathetic but you seem to not understand how parental rights are viewed and what is and is not grounds for denying visitation and parental rights.
     
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  17. aw346a

    aw346a Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Your legal advice is sound. Your personal opinion on my daughter being a mistake is not. She is not just a number to me in a court case like you. She is not just some post on a forum. She is not a problem that needs solved. She is far far from a mistake and I don’t know how you could bring yourself to say that to me. I know you don’t know me personally or anything but I really am a five star mother when it comes to my daughter. She is my world.

    I also was not the one that told him about his baby. He had a charge for battery on a pregnant woman and he then contacted me about it.

    I realize now that he isn’t going to change. She was conceived after we had been broken up with absolutely zero contact for 6 months and I gave him a chance after doing some deep soul searching in my life and I believe wholeheartedly that it was the right decision. My daughter is worth it to me. I believe it really was gods plan for me.

    Sure it may be difficult and scary but that doesn’t mean I regret having her by any means and for you to even imply that I should is ridiculous. She is an innocent and sweet soul that has nothing to do with her father other than some DNA.

    Thank you for your legal advice, but stick to that from now on and be aware of the things you are actually saying.
     
  18. aw346a

    aw346a Law Topic Starter New Member

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    To everyone else. He has three days of visitation with her from 9-5. After the beginning of the new year he has begun only utilizing his Saturday’s, which is against the court order.

    I still would like to know how to delete this thread and thank you all to those who have offered support.
     
  19. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

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  20. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    A parent could be allowed a week of visitation every two weeks.
    The person might decide NOT to utilize the visitation.

    The court doesn't care.

    The court only cares IF the person uses MORE time than allotted.

    If you ask, one of the mods can delete the thread.
     

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