Restraining order issued in Hillsborough County, FL under false allegations

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singlemotherof2

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My ex had me served with an injunction of domestic violence with a minor and in his injunction he made several false allegations. The purpose of the injunction was to have me removed from the residence we have shared for the past 2 1/2 years and also so that he could obtain temporary custody of our 4mo old son (which was granted). He stated that I have made false allegations against him through the police and have tried to have him arrested through these allegations, I have harassed him via phone, broke a TV and a glass table. I in turn filed an injunction against him and provided copies of police reports filed due to domestic violence along with picture of injuries, a letter of intent to prosecute from the state attorneys office, a copy of a death threat his sister posted on a social website along the police report I filed against her. I also stated that our son is in immediate danger due to his 130lb rottweiler that is in the residence which has attacked on 5 different occasion, 4 different times. I am a victim of one of his attacks as well as for my ex's 8yr old niece who was attacked twice. I also mentioned that a Hillsborough County deputy and myself witnessed an electrical heater/fan (that was hooked up to an electrical outlet) was placed in the baby's wrought iron crib which puts the child at risk of electrocution and/or possible injuries to fingers and toes. Because my ex filed his injunction first, the child remained in his custody. I did not commit any acts of violence nor was I ever arrested for such a crime however; my ex was arrested on April 26, 2009 for domestic violence (also mentioned in injunction and police report provided). We are due in court this coming Monday and I would like to know whats the best way to prepare my defense against him in court so I may get my baby back. Our child was born out of wedlock and the father refused to sign the birth certificate. We are due in court soon for child custody and establishment of paternity (date of hearing TBD). My situation is complicated and I'm in financial bind therefore I am unable to retain a lawyer and Bay Area Legal Services stated that they did not have sufficient resources to represent me so please help...
 
I'm going to give you a detailed explanation of what to do when my lunch has settled and I feel like writing. But to just start things off with, stay with your strong points and don't try to stretch hypotheticals into "dangers" to the children.

In other words, when you have police reports, verified threats, pictures of injuries and the like, do not water that REAL EVIDENCE down with flimsy arguments about a Dog and potential electrocution from heating fans. Don't get me wrong any good parent is going to take steps to be careful with both, but you are trying to equate ACTUAL danger and violence with POTENTIAL danger and violence. All that does is makes your case look weak and reactionary.

If you have a good case with the police reports and violence, the potential problems are just noise and make you look like you are trying to make something out of nothing.

Standby and I'll write more when I feel like doing it today. ;) Good luck.
 
I'm surprised he got Temporary Custody of the 4 mo old at all since he has not proven paternity and is not on the Birth Certificate.

Remember my advice, come off as a cool headed rational woman, not a crazed Mother who will do or say anything to get her 4 month old son back. If you take offense at that, that's the problem.

For example, 130lb Rottweilers rarely bother BABIES. Saying that your son is in imminent danger from one just makes you sound like you need to make up things because you have a weak case. Saying that you (and a deputy to add credibility) saw an electric heater unit next to a wrought iron crib makes you sound deperate or out of your mind paranoid. Especially when you add such a winner as "puts the child at risk of electrocution and/or possible injuries to fingers and toes." First the baby is 4 months old, how is he going to get out of his CRIB and get his little fingers and toes in an electric heater on the floor? Secondly, saying that a deputy saw something DANGEROUS and left the child in the situation just makes you sound wrong. If the Deputy thought the situation was dangerous he would have taken action. Your story sounds contrived, weak, and desperate. If you want to win, stop that.:no:

Now compare this statement:

He stated that I have made false allegations against him through the police and have tried to have him arrested through these allegations, I have harassed him via phone, broke a TV and a glass table.
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To this statement:

I in turn filed an injunction against him and provided copies of police reports filed due to domestic violence along with picture of injuries, a letter of intent to prosecute from the state attorneys office, a copy of a death threat his sister posted on a social website along the police report I filed against her.
Click to expand...

Do you see the difference? The first one is a load of CRAP and the second one is a series of threats, assaults, and violence that is DOCUMENTED and ACTIONABLE. You take something that clear and add a Devil Dog and a menacing space heater to it and you just cloud the issue.

How should you proceed?

1. He has not proved his paternity to the child and has no business having custody. Bring the birth certificate and show that he is not on it and tell the judge that he has not proven his paternity. The judge should have the bailiff get your child right then and there and hand him to you.

2. Deny flatly that you committed any domestic violence and remind the court that there are no police reports, arrests warrants, pictures of injury, or threats on the internet that support his claim.:angel

3. Bring your police reports, copies of the threat, pictures of abuse, the letter from the DA who wants to prosecute and show the Court that he is the threat and danger to you not the other way around.:dgrin

4. Say as few words as you need to, don't add a single thing that you can leave out. If you get into devil dogs and space heaters the judge is going to think you are a loon. Stick to Police reports, Pictures of Injuries, and letters from DA's who say he's an abuser who is going to jail.

Stay calm at all costs. I know as a Mother you are freaked out not having your child. That's ok, but you don't want to appear to be freaked out to the Judge. Be calm, cool and collected. You are on the right side of this and all you want to do is to show the Judge a clear picture.

On this side we have worried momma/abused girlfriend who wants her baby back and abuser to stay the hell away.

On this side we have lying man who took temporary custody to a baby that is not even proven to be his, has police reports, and arrests pending against him, pictures of the injuries his violence has created, and involvement of family who is posting threats on the internet.

Ask Army how he would decide. He use to be a Judge. Hold it together, stick to the facts not the fears, and you will walk out with your son and a Protective Order. Then, as Judge Judy would say, sleep with better men who are married to you. :yes:
 
I thought things through after filing my injunction as to how I would present my case in court and exactly what you have stated is the stragedy that I chose to follow so you have just confirmed that my thought out plan was right. I did intend to leave out anything that I did not have proof of b/c as you said, I do not want to sound desperate or like a loon. The heater/fan was IN the crib, nor my ex nor the child was present in the home when I stopped by with deputy. Unfortunately the deputy did not allow me to snap a picture so I could also add that to my defense so no need to present in court. Im going to stick to your advise which I highly appreciate you offering. Thank you again for your help.
 
Wait! There was an ELECTRIC SPACE HEATER IN THE CRIB? Honestly that sounds like a man who has never taken care of kids trying to do the "right" thing. {face palm}. I'm not sure what right the Deputy had in telling you not to take a picture. It's a free country. I would have subpoenaed him to the hearing and he wouldn't say such silliness next time. Good luck. I think you have a good case.
 
jharris352 said:
Wait! There was an ELECTRIC SPACE HEATER IN THE CRIB? Honestly that sounds like a man who has never taken care of kids trying to do the "right" thing. {face palm}. I'm not sure what right the Deputy had in telling you not to take a picture. It's a free country. I would have subpoenaed him to the hearing and he wouldn't say such silliness next time. Good luck. I think you have a good case.
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Partner, that's about three grand of legal advice.

Darn good legal advice if I might say so!

If I heard those facts, I'd give her the baby.
 
Thanks Judge, I thought she was being silly, she's not! She will win if she just sticks to the facts.
 
Yes it's true, he does not have experience with children of our baby's age, that is why I offered him educational classes (which he refused to take) nevertheless, I went to court today and the Judge asked if what we stated in our injunctions was true and if we both wanted to enforce the injunctions and we both answered yes. The Judge then told us that if that was the case, that he was going to place the baby in foster care b/c we both have accused each other of being violent and that he did not find our home to be an environment that would be appropriate for the child. The Judge then proceeded to ask my ex if he had established paternity and once he answered no and before he could get another word out of his mouth, the Judge dismissed both injunctions and asked for the child to be returned to me. The Judge stated that it would be up to me if I wanted my ex to have any contact or visitation with the child until my ex establishes paternity and he also stated that it was up to my ex to provide financial support of any kind.
My ex questioned about me returning to our home and I simply answered that I was not interested in the residence, I had found somewhere to stay....I am satisfied with the outcome and was relieved that it wasn't as complicated as I thought it would be....now to prepare for the child custody battle, how fun....
 
BTW, I didnt even have to prove my case. The Judge didnt know that I had filed an injunction against him until I mentioned it in court and of course he didnt even bother to ask for a copy of any of the paperwork I had prepared in my defense. He simply asked the questiones and made the statements I mentioned in my previous post and that was it! Case Closed!
 
If you've wound up being bred by a deadbeat, you know he won't pay child support, why complicate your life ladies?

Keep your mouth shut and don't put his illicit name on your precious child's birth certificate.

He will be a poor influence on the kid anyway.

He never kept his word with you, and he won't with the child.

He's broken your heart, don't let him do the same to your child!!!

Good job, singlemom, now you be a great mother to that child.

You and the kid are free!!

I don't believe in lying except when you can protect another person.

When the child asks, "Where's my dad"? You can say he died in the war.



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