Relocation - Marrying into Military

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Charger

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I am active duty military and have been with (dating) a woman that has custody of a 4 year old. I am PCS transferring in late 2010 and am planning on asking her to marry me. Her current custody agreement states she cannot move away from the father. We know that he would be unwilling to agree to a move, which could possibly be across the country. I would like some help to know which steps we could take in advance to see if a move would be allowed if we were to get married. I do not want us to get married and find out that there's no chance of her leaving the state.

The father does see the child regularly but has not paid child support in years (even though he's ordered to). I know that's a whole separate issue that she needs to take care of but not sure if it would factor in a court's decision.

Any insight/direction would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance. :)
 
Charger said:
I am active duty military and have been with (dating) a woman that has custody of a 4 year old. I am PCS transferring in late 2010 and am planning on asking her to marry me. Her current custody agreement states she cannot move away from the father. We know that he would be unwilling to agree to a move, which could possibly be across the country. I would like some help to know which steps we could take in advance to see if a move would be allowed if we were to get married. I do not want us to get married and find out that there's no chance of her leaving the state.

The father does see the child regularly but has not paid child support in years (even though he's ordered to). I know that's a whole separate issue that she needs to take care of but not sure if it would factor in a court's decision.

Any insight/direction would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance. :)
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Your wishes do not supersede those of the father's court order.

Mom can file for a modification, but, if not granted, mom and child stay where they are.
 
The Dad's rights trump yours. You have no rights here whatsoever and Dad should not have to see his son less because mom wants to move out of state. Dad has a good chance of securing custody in this instance, especially since there appears to be a geographic restriction in the order. So now you know, there is a good chance mom will not be able to move with the child.
 
You can use the child support issue to get the Father to make a deal to let you take the child with you. He can be in some really big trouble. If you want to enforce the agreement it will not go well for him. Perhaps if you pay for the expense of his visitation from across country and agree not to prosecute him for the back child support he MAY agree to letting the child move with the Mom.
 
jharris352 said:
You can use the child support issue to get the Father to make a deal to let you take the child with you. He can be in some really big trouble. If you want to enforce the agreement it will not go well for him. Perhaps if you pay for the expense of his visitation from across country and agree not to prosecute him for the back child support he MAY agree to letting the child move with the Mom.
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Which sounds suspiciously like blackmail.

Move aways do not go over well in Mass.
 
I will also have to admit to a fair amount of trepidation for the "I will lower your arrears if you let me do X" thought process.
 
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