Re-cooping Arrears

Short answer: No.
Practical advice: Don't depend on child support. If it happens, it is a bonus.

 

Nope - for one thing the state does not want the hassle of trying to collect.

 

You could always send the kids to him...

 

No, the state won't make good on what the deadbeat owes you.
If the state did that, the taxpayers would get stiffed.
As it is today, the deadbeat ONLY stiffs you.

The deadbeat owes you, not the taxpayers.
So, you need to pursue what you're owed.
There are collection agencies who claim they'll collect it, for a cut of it, of course.

 

How would that fix his arrears?

 

The government(taxpayers) already pick up the tab aplenty for deadbeat parents in the form of food stamps, Medicaid etc. If he is paying less than the current amount, then that is because he doesn't make enough money to pay more. He wouldn't be able to pay the state either. I agree with Katdini. Do your best to provide the basics without child support and whatever you do receive can be used for savings or perhaps a few luxuries.

 

Simple math.... No support given to them. It will balance out.

 

But he would still have to pay what he owes even if he got custody. He has to pay off what is in arrears. If she gave over custody then she would have to pay support but no way that would balance out if he owes $47,000.

 

Owing a debt, and actually paying that debt don't always occur.
I know people who owe over $300,000 in child support.
Most refuse to pay a dollar of it.
Many tell me they'll die owing the debt.
They say they're okay with going off the "grid".
It has become a very bizarre world in which we must live.

 

I'm just saying it wouldn't make things "even" with the one who is in arrears. He's going to continue owing it even if she gave him custody or he got custody. But then she would just have to start paying him.

I know people who don't ever pay debts. I have a ton of people who owe me. My ex is at about $11,000 in arrears for his four kids...and owes me a year's worth of half of daycare and unreimbursed medical. Am I going to get it? Nope. It was nice when I did for two months. I barely noticed since it was $25 a week and went straight into my daughter's account that I use for daycare. But yeah I get that.

I just was confused as to how it would make his arrears go away if he got custody. It wouldn't.

 

Yes ma'am, that KIND of debt never gets erased.

Only your death will extinguish that KIND of debt.

 

Who said it would make it go away? OP stated she was struggling to make ends meet. One way to make ends meet would be drop the kids off at dads. Let him foot the bill for a while.

 

He is already supposed to be footing the bill.

Pretty sure that's not an option for her - and he should pay his part. If he isn't going to pay now what makes you think he would even take custody of the kids?

 

That's another great question.
In my exposure to deadbeat pappies and mammies, they care more for themselves and their well being than they do for others, especially their kids.

However, if they do get the kid(s), in their devious minds; it protects their money.

Deadbeats also hate anyone who comes after their money, especially former bed playmates.

 

Either way that's not likely an option for her at all.

OP needs to just deal with the fact you are never going to likely see that money. If you aren't getting assistance and haven't looked into it go look.

 

I quickly concluded that very few people take the advice dispensed by another party, even the one they've PAID to dispense such advice.

I've seen dozens of criminal defendants sabotage their own cases.

I've also concluded, after a few weeks with my newly acquired law license, not to take the ignorance of others personally.

It has made my life so much easier.