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Never Married Non-Custodial Parent

Discussion in 'Child Support' started by Katherine1313, May 10, 2016.

  1. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 Law Topic Starter Guest

    Jurisdiction:
    Massachusetts
    Good Morning,

    My husband has a college-bound daughter who resides in Mississippi. She has lived with the man on her birth certificate for the last 9 years. She does not live with her mother. Her mom was married when my husband got her pregnant. When we discovered the child resided with a person other than her mother, the $1300 per month child support was dismissed with prejudice. My husband continues to pay support to the man his child lives with, without a court order. The mom completed the FAFSA, and lied about her daughter's support from my husband. My husband sends checks for birthdays and Christmas, without ever receiving a thank you from his daughter. There is basically no relationship between my husband and his daughter, and that's the way she wants it. Now my husband's daughter's mom is after us to split the cost of college three ways. Does my husband have any recourse considering there is no relationship with his daughter, his daughter lives with a 3rd party, and his daughter's mother received over 60k in child support she wasn't entitled to before the dismissal with prejudice? Thanks!
     
  2. txls

    txls Well-Known Member

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    When you say she is "after us to split the cost" what exactly do you mean?
     
  3. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    They are attempting to extort 8000.00 from us. The final bill doesn't come out until the end of July, but they are threatening to take us to court beforehand.
     
  4. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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  5. txls

    txls Well-Known Member

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    I don't know what the requirements are(if any) for Dad to split college costs. But if it is required, the fact of no relationship with Dad and the fact that she doesn't live with him will be irrelevant. Under NO circumstances should you pay anything to anyone before consulting an attorney. By the way, people threaten to take people to court all the time and it doesn't happen.
     
  6. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    Thanks!
     
  7. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    They're threatening you because they don't have an issue to litigate by which they'll prevail.

    However, why would these deadbeats bother to take your husband to court?

    He prevailed in a previous litigation, yet he continues to cough up loot.

    He's dehumanized himself, and he's seen as a coughing, cashman.

    In MS child support can continue until age 21.

    I suspect that's why the grifters are now demanding $8,000.

    If I were your husband, I'd pay $8,000 to hire an attorney.

    On an annual basis, the coughing cashman is coughing up $16,000 without a court order.

    Why not take him for another eight grand, up front,just because.

    If the coughing cashman pays absent a paternity test, that's ridiculous.

    The first thing he should have done was request a paternity test, before shelling out a dime.

    Add to that that the impregnated female was married when the child was born, her husband is, and remains the legal father.

    I suggest you advise your husband to see a lawyer tomorrow.

    He's paid in excess of $300,000 for a child that isn't legally his.

    The link provides important information about child support in MS:

    Child Support in Mississippi | DivorceNet.com
     
  8. cynthiag

    cynthiag Active Member

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    So someone other than your husband is actually named as her father on her birth certificate? And you say that your husband is paying child support to him, even though there's nothing from the court ordering him to pay it? If the child support to the mother was dismissed and no court order exists saying that your husband has to pay child support to the man his daughter lives with (who I would presume, by virtue of the fact that he is the one named on the birth certificate, would be the person considered to be her legal father), then that would seem to cast doubt on the idea of some sort of court order existing that would require him to split college costs.

    I'm also not quite understanding where the $8,000 figure comes from, if the college costs come to $17,000 and she has $15,000 in scholarships.
     
  9. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    Thanks!
    Paternity was established 17 years ago.
    My husband's attorney told my husband to pay "something" each month as a good faith gesture to the man raising his daughter. Now that my husband's daughter is 18, her mom wants those support checks sent directly to the child. I found out yesterday that the actual cost of the tuition, with everything included, is 27k. The child's scholarships total 15k, leaving a balance of 12k for the academic year. If we split that three ways it's 4k each. The mother was, AGAIN, attempting to extort her portion from my husband. It never ends with her. Thanks for the Mississippi support rules, but she always files in Massachusetts.
     
  10. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    There's no court order for tuition yet, but she's threatening one.
     
  11. KatDini

    KatDini Well-Known Member

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    Most courts will not entertain a college tuition case this late in the game.
     
  12. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    When hubby met with the lawyers, what did he learn?

    Why not cease all communications with the greedy clown?
    Change all telephone numbers, or block her when she attempts to call, or email.

    Stop allowing and aiding the grifter in scamming your money.
     
  13. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    His lawyer says he's on the hook for 1/3 of the outstanding balance. I think he needs a new lawyer. Army Judge? The man raising my husband's daughter procured a military ID card for her about 8 years ago. Is this legal via just being on her birth certificate or does the fact he knows she's not his biological child figure in there somehow?
     
  14. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    I'm tired of the threats.
     
  15. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    The fact that the man raising the child obtained a military ID card is prima facie evidence that he claimed her as a dependent. To get such a card, you have to prove the child is yours, or you have legal custody.

    Your husband is getting gouged, and she's stealing from your family.

    He darned sure does need a better lawyer.
     
    Katherine1313 likes this.
  16. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    Thanks so much! I have another question, if you don't mind. Should the money my husband sends to the man raising his daughter be included on the FAFSA? Is it ok to exclude this money just because there's no court order? My husband never filled out anything as a non-custodial parent. Is he even a non-custodial parent?
     
  17. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    I think you said the child's mother was married to the man when the child was born.

    If that's true he's the father, not your husband.
    I don't think your husband is the father.
    If that's true, he has no obligation to pay.
    Why your husband is shelling out $1,600 a month without a court order baffles me.

    Maybe he or she is blackmailing your husband about something far worse than having a child out of wedlock.

    Has your husband ever done a paternity test?
    Maybe you and he need to have a heart to heart talk?
    This thing doesn't add up.
     
  18. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    My husband had an order for support against him because the paternity test proved he was the father. Until 3 years ago, we had no idea the daughter resided with someone other than her mother. At that point, my husband went to court and the Judge dismissed the support with prejudice. My husband's lawyer told my husband to continue paying the man raising his daughter a sum of 300 per month as a good faith gesture. Previously, my husband paid his daughter's mom 1300 per month. My husband considers himself an upstanding man, which he is, and felt a moral obligation to continue paying support even though there was no court order. There's no blackmail happening, just unrequited love. When the mom's husband divorced her for getting pregnant by my husband, she thought my husband would marry her. There was no relationship between my husband and this woman. It was a one night stand he's lived to regret. That being said, where does it end? Should my husband force their hand with the threat of court over college tuition?
     
  19. cynthiag

    cynthiag Active Member

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    I'm curious why your husband's lawyer would even tell him to continue to pay the legal father of the girl $300/month as a "good faith gesture", and then also tell him he's on the hook for 1/3 of the college tuition costs. Your husband may be the biological father, but the man listed on her birth certificate, who has been raising her, is her legal father. Obviously, if he claimed her as a dependent to get a military dependent ID card, she is considered to be his dependent. If anybody should be paying that man child support, it's the girl's mother, since she is the non-custodial parent in this case. I think your husband needs to find a new lawyer ASAP!
     
  20. Katherine1313

    Katherine1313 New Member

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    I agree with you. He's seeking new counsel for this matter. His daughter is raised by a man who got her a military ID, claims her on his taxes, filled out her FAFSA, is the parent listed on her college account, and has never sought a penny from my husband. It's been her mother all along who has badgered my husband for support and tuition.
     

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