Hello, I am twenty years old and my parents recently went through a two year divorce and I have a couple of concerns. Before I get to those concerns, I would like to tell you a little bit about the divorce. My parents separated two years ago because my dad got physical with my mom. Immediately after he left, my dad went to Asia for almost two years "treasure hunting." He has hardly called my sister or myself at all which really hurts. During the divorce hearing, my dad claimed that he was unemployed, so the judge gave him hardly any of the debt that he had created without anyone's knowledge. About three days later, he was suddenly president of a large oil exploration company; so he went from no income to a six diget income. He obviously had this job lined up before hand, but probably decided to wait until after the divorce. His attorney and my dad have still not signed the final papers and my grandmother recently passed away, leaving my mother with an inheritance. So my questions are: Can he legally claim unemployment in a case like that even thought he probably already excepted the job? Does he have any right to my mother's inheritance? My mother is entitled to some of the money if his investment in Asia pays off, is there any way of insuring that? I appreciate the feedback because my mother is my only support in this world as I am attending college with no help from my father what so ever. Thanks.
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Jerk Dad
- Thread Starter 66stang
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You stated
that you are 20 years old but you don't state how old your sister is. If your sister is still a minor, then certain rules apply dependent upon the state of jurisdiction of the divorce (you don't specify--so no one can really give you any legitimate information). There would also be child support issues if she is a minor, etc.
Now...not to be too mean about it...you are 20 years old. You are an "adult" and it is a voluntary action whether or not your parents (mother OR father) decide to pay for your post- high school education. Higher education is not a guarantee in "intact" families either.
In some instances there are clauses incorporated into divorce decrees that cover post-secodary education. It seems that your education is not...
So, if your mother CHOOSES to assist you in your pursuits then you should bow down and thank her, but you have no legitimate complaint against your father if he chooses not to assist you.
Many people have attended university (myself included) by actually working.
It seems to me that your father simply wanted to walk away and be finished without alimony that can go on for years and years...it doesn't seem likely to me that he'd risk that for a one-time payment from an inheritance. In my opinion anyway.
that you are 20 years old but you don't state how old your sister is. If your sister is still a minor, then certain rules apply dependent upon the state of jurisdiction of the divorce (you don't specify--so no one can really give you any legitimate information). There would also be child support issues if she is a minor, etc.
Now...not to be too mean about it...you are 20 years old. You are an "adult" and it is a voluntary action whether or not your parents (mother OR father) decide to pay for your post- high school education. Higher education is not a guarantee in "intact" families either.
In some instances there are clauses incorporated into divorce decrees that cover post-secodary education. It seems that your education is not...
So, if your mother CHOOSES to assist you in your pursuits then you should bow down and thank her, but you have no legitimate complaint against your father if he chooses not to assist you.
Many people have attended university (myself included) by actually working.
It seems to me that your father simply wanted to walk away and be finished without alimony that can go on for years and years...it doesn't seem likely to me that he'd risk that for a one-time payment from an inheritance. In my opinion anyway.
Firs of all my sister is over 18 and yes my dad would risk everything if he could bring my mother down. The only reason that I mentioned my education was to show that the only person that supports me is my mother. I never asked my father for monitary support, only that he actually call me more frequently then once every six months and that when I call him he doesn't tell me how aweful my mother is. All I wanted to know is if my dad had any right to my mothers inheritance. I understand that you may have paid for your own college and I too work. I am here mainly on my own income and loans which I have secured thank you very much. My mother supports my by pitching in when she can and actually talking to me like a parent should. It seems that you're pretty bitter about something, and for that I am sorry. I just thought that a father would love his son enough to actually call him, or write him, or something. I really don't care if he doesn't support me monetarily. Many people have to fight their way through school and I am one of them. So to repeat my main question, does my father have the right to my mother's inheritance if the divorce was made final in November, but the final papers haven't been signed yet?
Your original questions:
So my questions are: Can he legally claim unemployment in a case like that even thought he probably already excepted the job? Does he have any right to my mother's inheritance? My mother is entitled to some of the money if his investment in Asia pays off, is there any way of insuring that? I appreciate the feedback because my mother is my only support in this world as I am attending college with no help from my father what so ever. Thanks.
The "I appreciate the feedback because my mother is my only support in this world as I am attending college with no help from my father what so ever. Thanks." (BTW...it's "whatsoever" but I digress...) comment certainly comes across as though it is more that you are concerned with getting your hands in the coffers not your actual concern for your mother's welfare.
So, let me see if I've got this right...it's NOT okay for him to claim unemployment (which, by the way, even if he has accepted--yes, it's accepted, not "excepted"--a position, but has either not begun employment--or received any payment--is entitled to) or hide assets...I do agree that hiding assets is a nefarious action, but one that is done with some frequency, so unless you can prove where and how much (and that they were in existence prior to the final decree--in that he's perjured himself by not disclosing all assets) then Mum is out of luck as far as his "investments in Asia". If however, she has already been granted a portion (but you said "if his investment in Asia pays off"???) then if he does not hold up to his promise, he would be in contempt. It is the "IF" portion that bothers me... that seems to place the burden of proof of profit on your Mum... then is it a profit 1 year down the road...5...10??? Does your Mum even have an attorney for her divorce?
Now, the inheritance. You do not give a specific time frame of events. Also, I have a question. This "final decree" that you mention...was this a final hearing with a judge or was it a "final" mediation meeting between the parties to come to an agreed order that both must sign to submit to have it officially entered into record?? Because this can potentially make a difference. Most likely since they'd already been separated for two years, a judge would not grant him a portion of the inheritance. That said, I stand by my original reply...
"It seems to me that your father simply wanted to walk away and be finished without alimony that can go on for years and years...it doesn't seem likely to me that he'd risk that for a one-time payment from an inheritance. In my opinion anyway." I don't think he'd want to frustrate the process further since he is already now employed and most likely not wanting to risk reopening the case, and thus opening himself to alimony.
Now as far as my being "bitter", that is hardly the case. I am simply a realist providing feedback based upon your very own words in the original post. Perhaps you should go back and reread it for tone and content from an objective POV.
So my questions are: Can he legally claim unemployment in a case like that even thought he probably already excepted the job? Does he have any right to my mother's inheritance? My mother is entitled to some of the money if his investment in Asia pays off, is there any way of insuring that? I appreciate the feedback because my mother is my only support in this world as I am attending college with no help from my father what so ever. Thanks.
The "I appreciate the feedback because my mother is my only support in this world as I am attending college with no help from my father what so ever. Thanks." (BTW...it's "whatsoever" but I digress...) comment certainly comes across as though it is more that you are concerned with getting your hands in the coffers not your actual concern for your mother's welfare.
So, let me see if I've got this right...it's NOT okay for him to claim unemployment (which, by the way, even if he has accepted--yes, it's accepted, not "excepted"--a position, but has either not begun employment--or received any payment--is entitled to) or hide assets...I do agree that hiding assets is a nefarious action, but one that is done with some frequency, so unless you can prove where and how much (and that they were in existence prior to the final decree--in that he's perjured himself by not disclosing all assets) then Mum is out of luck as far as his "investments in Asia". If however, she has already been granted a portion (but you said "if his investment in Asia pays off"???) then if he does not hold up to his promise, he would be in contempt. It is the "IF" portion that bothers me... that seems to place the burden of proof of profit on your Mum... then is it a profit 1 year down the road...5...10??? Does your Mum even have an attorney for her divorce?
Now, the inheritance. You do not give a specific time frame of events. Also, I have a question. This "final decree" that you mention...was this a final hearing with a judge or was it a "final" mediation meeting between the parties to come to an agreed order that both must sign to submit to have it officially entered into record?? Because this can potentially make a difference. Most likely since they'd already been separated for two years, a judge would not grant him a portion of the inheritance. That said, I stand by my original reply...
"It seems to me that your father simply wanted to walk away and be finished without alimony that can go on for years and years...it doesn't seem likely to me that he'd risk that for a one-time payment from an inheritance. In my opinion anyway." I don't think he'd want to frustrate the process further since he is already now employed and most likely not wanting to risk reopening the case, and thus opening himself to alimony.
Now as far as my being "bitter", that is hardly the case. I am simply a realist providing feedback based upon your very own words in the original post. Perhaps you should go back and reread it for tone and content from an objective POV.
Thanks
I appreciate your more in depth answer. I truely do care about my mother's welfare, although it may not seem like it. The way my dads investment works in Asia is that he basically was working pro-bono in hopes of finding gold that was left over from world war two. In the actual divorce in November, the judge awarded my mother half of anything they fin in Asia because my father said that it was worthless. He has about $350,000 invested in time in Asia. There is a possibility that the company he was working for will find nothing, but there is a possibility that they will find quite a bit too; this is where the "if" comes into play. Its good to know that a judge probably wouldn't award my father any inheritance. My mother does have a lawyer and she is filing a "motion to compel" I believe it is to force my fathers lawyer to sign the final decree. What my mother's lawyer is trying to get my father's lawyer to sign is just the final paperwork whatever that may be. In November they went to court and agreed on who gets what and then the judge declared their marriage terminated. This is about all I know. I appreciate your timely response. I think I'm just anxious for all of this to be over so that we can go back to a somewhat normal family life.
I appreciate your more in depth answer. I truely do care about my mother's welfare, although it may not seem like it. The way my dads investment works in Asia is that he basically was working pro-bono in hopes of finding gold that was left over from world war two. In the actual divorce in November, the judge awarded my mother half of anything they fin in Asia because my father said that it was worthless. He has about $350,000 invested in time in Asia. There is a possibility that the company he was working for will find nothing, but there is a possibility that they will find quite a bit too; this is where the "if" comes into play. Its good to know that a judge probably wouldn't award my father any inheritance. My mother does have a lawyer and she is filing a "motion to compel" I believe it is to force my fathers lawyer to sign the final decree. What my mother's lawyer is trying to get my father's lawyer to sign is just the final paperwork whatever that may be. In November they went to court and agreed on who gets what and then the judge declared their marriage terminated. This is about all I know. I appreciate your timely response. I think I'm just anxious for all of this to be over so that we can go back to a somewhat normal family life.
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