1. Free Legal Help, Legal Forms and Lawyers. TheLaw.com has been providing free legal assistance online since 1995. Our most popular destinations for legal help are below. It only takes a minute to join our legal community!

    Dismiss Notice

I am estranged from my son and his girlfriend and have not seen

Discussion in 'Grandparents Rights' started by LorettaLu, Aug 12, 2019.

  1. LorettaLu

    LorettaLu Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Jurisdiction:
    Missouri
    my granddaughters who are 3 and 4 in two months. Here is the background story. My son's girlfriend is a heroin addict who was arrested a year ago for shoplifting, possession of drug paraphernalia and possession of a controlled substance. She was given a year probation. Recently, my son called me and asked me to come over and help with the girls and informed me that his girlfriend had left the house, lied about who she was with and where she was going and withdrew money out of their account. He was very sure that she was out trying to score. He was very angry and desperately trying to get a hold of her. She finally returned home and became very angry that I was there and began to verbally attack me, saying I had planted these thoughts in my son's head which I absolutely did not. I left with my son's reassurance that he would not let her keep the girls from me which she has done before. My son is an enabler and the next day decided he shouldn't have involved me and proceeded to tell me he believed her story about where she was at. I confronted her about her addiction and she became enraged and cussed me out. She harassed me with repeated texts and harassed my 18 year old daughter as well. I tried to see the girls once in the last two months and was met with her trying to physically attack me and spitting in my face. I got in my car and left and have not talked to either one of them since.

    My question is this, in the state of Missouri do grandparents have the right to ask the court to grant them visitation with their grandchildren? I do want to retain an attorney and inflame the situation even more if when I get to court, I find the judge will just agree with the parents decision to not let me see the girls.
     
  2. PayrollHRGuy

    PayrollHRGuy Active Member

    Messages:
    385
    Likes Received:
    193
    Trophy Points:
    43
  3. zddoodah

    zddoodah Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,125
    Likes Received:
    654
    Trophy Points:
    113

    Let me start this response by stating a couple of assumptions. I assume

    1. That your son and his girlfriend are not and never have been married.
    2. That your son's paternity has never been established.
    3. There are no court orders concerning custody, visitation and/or child support.

    If any of all of these assumptions are incorrect, please advise. If #2 is wrong, please specify how his paternity was established (and please note that "his name is on the birth certificates" does not answer that question).

    Yes. In fact, it is the case in every state that everyone has "the right to ask [a] court" for anything.

    With that said, under Missouri law, a court has the power to grant visitation under any of the following circumstances:

    (1) The parents of the child have filed for a dissolution of their marriage;

    (2) One parent of the child is deceased and the surviving parent denies reasonable visitation to a parent of the deceased parent of the child;

    (3) The child has resided in the grandparent's home for at least six months within the twenty-four month period immediately preceding the filing of the petition; or

    (4) A grandparent is unreasonably denied visitation with the child for a period exceeding ninety days, unless the parents are legally married to each other and are living together with the child.

    Missouri Revised Stats section 452.402.

    It seems that #4 may apply to you once 90 days have passed. You will need a local attorney to review the situation and advise you about what constitutes "unreasonable" denial of visitation.

    It's possible that the judge will agree with the parents' decision. Anytime you take a matter to court, there is some risk involved.
     
  4. zddoodah

    zddoodah Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,125
    Likes Received:
    654
    Trophy Points:
    113

    Edit function still not working....

    If the assumptions mentioned in my prior response are correct, you will need to have your son's paternity established before the court will consider awarding you visitation.
     
  5. LorettaLu

    LorettaLu Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    I assume to have my son's paternity established, he will have to consent to that and that would definitely be a no go. He's now on his girlfriend's side and says she needs someone in her corner.
     
  6. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

    Messages:
    30,829
    Likes Received:
    4,359
    Trophy Points:
    113

    You assume correctly.



    The best thing you can do is stay out of this mess.

    The ONLY thing you KNOW is that a woman gave birth to a baby.

    You don't know who fathered that child.

    I understand your concern, but never meddle in the messy affairs of others.

    Why?

    The genuinely concerned, caring party will always end up getting hurt.

    In this case, ma'am, you are THAT concerned, sincere party.

    Save yourself, because you can't save the world.
     
  7. LorettaLu

    LorettaLu Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    3
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Well thank you for your advice and candor. I hope to reconcile with my son when he wises up. I think just keeping an eye on the situation through friends and other family might be a better idea than going to court.
     
  8. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

    Messages:
    30,829
    Likes Received:
    4,359
    Trophy Points:
    113


    May God bless, comfort, and keep you as wait for the confused to gather their wits and come to their senses.
     
  9. leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,727
    Likes Received:
    227
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Well if your son and this woman have never married - did he ever establish his paternity via state laws? If not - he legally has no rights to them. If he does have his paternity established he can file for custody if he chooses.

    In most states, grandparents don't have any rights to grandkids. At most, judges may grant visitation to grandparents if there is a preexisting relationship that benefits the child and the parents are divorced or if one of the parents is deceased who is their child.

    I don't think you'll have much luck getting granted anything in the courts but you can always hire a lawyer. Or at least find one who does free consultations to get some legal advice. But you don't seem to fall under any of the provisions of the law for grandparent visitation.

    Also trying to reason with an addict will never happen - and if your son is wrapped in her bs right now don't fight him. Don't push him on the girlfriend issue because he will push you away. Been there, done that. When those kind of people get in your head it's hard to break free. HIS best bet is to get away from her, file for custody and maybe allow her visitation but only he can do that. If you push any issue, he's going to push you away.
     

Share This Page