1. Free Legal Help, Legal Forms and Lawyers. TheLaw.com has been providing free legal assistance online since 1995. Our most popular destinations for legal help are below. It only takes a minute to join our legal community!

    Dismiss Notice

Grandparents rights of a pregnant minor

Discussion in 'Grandparents Rights' started by Palm, Jan 9, 2016.

  1. Palm

    Palm Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Jurisdiction:
    Minnesota
    Hello-
    My 16 year old daughter is dating a 17 year old boy. I want to prepare myself legally for what my rights would be as the parent of the girl, if a pregnancy should occur. Believe me when I say we have talked about how to prevent this with our daughter at great length. However, being young and in love, things can get out of control & I want to know my rights.

    The boy will be going to college in California after graduation.

    1st question:
    If a pregnancy should occur now at their age. Can my husband & I make him or his parents care for the child half the time? We do not want child support, but half time care.

    2nd:
    Can we prevent him from leaving the state for college? We don't want him running away to college & leave us with fulltime care of his child.

    3rd:
    Do my husband & I have rights over our daughters baby? To decide who will take care of it, etc.
     
  2. KatDini

    KatDini Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,255
    Likes Received:
    288
    Trophy Points:
    83
    No.
    No.
    No.
     
  3. adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

    Messages:
    9,158
    Likes Received:
    2,943
    Trophy Points:
    113

    Really? To what extent?

    Have you handed her a package of condoms and demonstrated how to use one?

    Have you taken her to a gynecologist who can explain the consequences of an unwanted pregnancy? It works better if it comes from a professional. Might as well start her on birth control pills, too.
     
  4. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,740
    Likes Received:
    294
    Trophy Points:
    83
    The answer to all three are no as stated. If you have done your best to parent child then you have done your job. You cannot make decisions for her only guide her best you can. If you recall your own younger years you can most likely see choices you made that went against your parents even if they did wonderful job. Have you taken her to a Dr. and gotten her on pill? Have you not allowed her to go anywhere with this boy that sex might happen? Depending on state it could be unlawful for them to have sex and then you could use the law as a threat? Just so you know if she does become pregnant and this boy leaves before child is born and thus doe snot sign any birth documents he is NOT the legal Father and has NO legal obligations to child including support!
    Let me suggest a site where you can talk to other parents who may or may not have gone through this themselves. The link is in my signature line. Its a forum (like this one) but for parenting issues. The people who will reply are real people not professionals trying to sell you something. Look for words "Parentnook" in blue below
     
  5. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

    Messages:
    33,757
    Likes Received:
    5,466
    Trophy Points:
    113

    Your questions were answered CORRECTLY by Katdini.

    I would only ask you, as concerned parents acting proactively, to think about the meaning of love in the sense of COUPLING.

    HINT: 16 year olds are incapable of engaging in love.

    Please, don't confuse love with naughty, nasty anamalistic copulation.
    As a happily married couple, I'm certain what 16 year olds do doesn't rise to what you two feel in your marriage, does it?
     
  6. adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

    Messages:
    9,158
    Likes Received:
    2,943
    Trophy Points:
    113

    A paternity test would identify him as the father and make him obligated for child support.
     
  7. adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

    Messages:
    9,158
    Likes Received:
    2,943
    Trophy Points:
    113

    Romeo and Juliet.
     
  8. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

    Messages:
    33,757
    Likes Received:
    5,466
    Trophy Points:
    113

    Have you read the play?
    Notwithstanding its author and worldwide critical acclaim, it was a fictional account of a couple of alleged lovers who died in 1303, although some scholars claim the star crossed lovers were British Royals (progenitors of the 20th Century Lady Diana) during the middle of the 1590s.
    Somehow a suicide pact isn't what I'd call love.
    Is that what you call love?
     
  9. shrinkmaster

    shrinkmaster Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,740
    Likes Received:
    294
    Trophy Points:
    83
    I was referring to initially a court would need to order said test and then and only then would this boy be deemed the child's legal Father and be ordered to pay support.
     
  10. Palm

    Palm Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    I want to thank all of you for taking the time to respond to my question, I found a good point in each statement.

    I understand the need to determine legally that he is the father if a pregnancy should occur so he legally has to financial support his child.

    But shocked that he can just take off for college and not have to care for his child half the time. Why does the female have to take care of his baby full-time? I can't believe we can not legally make him or his parents share this responsibility.
     
  11. Palm

    Palm Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    We live in Minnesota.
     
  12. Disabled Vet

    Disabled Vet Active Member

    Messages:
    831
    Likes Received:
    248
    Trophy Points:
    43
    Why would you want to stop him? The better he does in life the better for the child. Maybe they will end up married.... Do you put her on the pill? Once it's proven that he is the father the courts will decide what is best for the baby.
     
  13. KatDini

    KatDini Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,255
    Likes Received:
    288
    Trophy Points:
    83
    That's one of the hazards of having children outside of wedlock.
     
  14. Palm

    Palm Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    My daughter also has the right to go to college.
     
  15. KatDini

    KatDini Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,255
    Likes Received:
    288
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Yes, except she CHOSE to have the responsibility of a child out of wedlock. She can still go to college, just maybe not get to have the whole 'going away to college' experience. Actions have consequences.
     
    Disabled Vet likes this.
  16. ElleMD

    ElleMD Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,032
    Likes Received:
    496
    Trophy Points:
    83
    If she wants to go away to school, she can, she just has to make arrangements for the child. You can't force someone to be a parent, either mother or father. The pregnancy could be terminated, or the child put up for adoption. She has those options. If she chooses to continue the pregnancy and raise the child, that is her choice. Likewise, this guy could forgo college, stick around, and file for custody/visitation. His choice. If she chooses to have and keep the baby, he might be required to pay something in child support. She will have to establish paternity and file with the courts for it. His parents aren't on the hook any more than you are. If you choose to be, great. You are not legally obligated to raise or support your grandchild. You do have to raise and support your own child until she is 18.
     
  17. Palm

    Palm Law Topic Starter New Member

    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    1st question:
    If a pregnancy should occur now at their age. Can my husband & I make him or his parents care for the child half the time? We do not want child support, but half time care.

    You are not legally obligated to raise or support your grandchild.


    My original question is above your statement. The answer to this question was no, I can't legally make the father or father's family take the child half time through a court proceeding.

    Is this correct?
     
  18. KatDini

    KatDini Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,255
    Likes Received:
    288
    Trophy Points:
    83
    You cannot make him or his parents physically care for the child. Period. Full stop. No ifs, ands or buts.
     
  19. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

    Messages:
    33,757
    Likes Received:
    5,466
    Trophy Points:
    113

    Adoption or abortion are possibilities which would permit your daughter to attend college without the added responsibility of a child.

    Birth control devices, shots, or pills prevent pregnancy, as does abstinence.
     
  20. ElleMD

    ElleMD Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,032
    Likes Received:
    496
    Trophy Points:
    83
    There is no way to force visitation on this guy, let alone joint 50/50 custody. Your daughter can force child support, but that is it. His parents have no part in this for either custody or support. They may choose to help out their child, but the extent to which they do and the terms under which they do it are totally up to them.
     

Share This Page