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Do we have a leg to stand on?

Discussion in 'Child Support' started by paa22, May 12, 2017.

  1. May 12, 2017 #1
    paa22

    paa22 Law Topic Starter Guest

    Jurisdiction:
    Virginia
    My fiance has been divorced for many years and his daughter will be 18 in June. She has been living with us since December 2016 as she no longer wanted to live at her mother's house anymore (long and crazy story). As we lacked the time and resources to go back to court and wanted his daughter to feel comfortable in her surrounding during her senior year, and she is almost 18 and we really didn't want a drawn out battle with her mother (and there would be), he just decided to keep things as is, pay his ex the child support until June and just let his daughter live with us without a fight. Since then, his ex has been harassing him for every single possible dime she can get out of him. (Orders top of the line glasses and sunglasses for their daughter without consulting him and sends him "half the bill", there is still a balance on the wisdom teeth removal she wants him paying, wants money for extra things regarding school, etc) We pay for everything while she lives with us, school lunch, clothes, food, household bills have gone up, extra curricular activities, etc AND pay his ex the child support. Do we have any say so in stopping all this harassment for his ex wife's so-called expenses? Thank you for any advice.
     
    paa22, May 12, 2017
    paa22, May 12, 2017
    #1
  2. May 12, 2017 #2
    adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

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    No.

    Not until your fiance gets off his butt and gets a court order changing whatever.
     
    adjusterjack, May 12, 2017
    adjusterjack, May 12, 2017
    #2
    leslie82 likes this.
  3. May 12, 2017 #3
    army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    You surely do have a say.

    You tell your "friend" that he MUST use HIS money to support HIS (almost adult) daughter.

    Then make sure you keep your money separate from his.

    Better yet, just move out tonight.

    You're not legally required to support any child(ren) but the ones YOU adopt or the ones you birth.
     
    army judge, May 12, 2017
    army judge, May 12, 2017
    #3
    leslie82 likes this.
  4. May 12, 2017 #4
    adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

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    Yeah, that, too. ^
     
    adjusterjack, May 12, 2017
    adjusterjack, May 12, 2017
    #4
  5. May 12, 2017 #5
    army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    Sigh, over and over, I'm shedding some tears, I'm sniffling, I'm sad now, my friend, sigh.
     
    army judge, May 12, 2017
    army judge, May 12, 2017
    #5
  6. May 13, 2017 #6
    leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    No - "we" don't and he doesn't either. He chose to not modify things through the court which was reasonable since she was almost 18. If it's in the court order that he pays half of medical and other things and he still has a child support order, then he has to pay it. If he doesn't want to pay it he should have modified it in court.

    What did you think would happen when you had a teenager living with you more often? Of course the bills went up. You have another person living with you. He's paying child support until the order says he doesn't have to do it anymore.
     
    leslie82, May 13, 2017
    leslie82, May 13, 2017
    #6
    hrforme likes this.
  7. May 13, 2017 #7
    Highwayman

    Highwayman Well-Known Member

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    You just said it's child support, so how is that the "ex wife's so-called expenses"?

    Since the child lives with him now he can go to court to amend the child support arrangements. It would be best to get an attorney who is experienced in family law issues.
     
    Highwayman, May 13, 2017
    Highwayman, May 13, 2017
    #7
  8. May 14, 2017 #8
    leslie82

    leslie82 Well-Known Member

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    She's 18 in a month. It's kind of pointless if that's when child support stops. The kid has been there since December and they didn't do anything. Which I don't blame the dad for not filing anything when even then she was six months from 18.

    I think the dad needs to read the order and find out when child support stops. Is it 18? Is it 21? Is it after college? If it's 18 then no point in court to modify. He just has to keep paying. If it's another age, go to court and modify.
     
    leslie82, May 14, 2017
    leslie82, May 14, 2017
    #8
  9. Jun 13, 2017 #9
    txls

    txls Well-Known Member

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    He can ignore her requests to pay for things "she wants" which do not fall under the court order.
     
    txls, Jun 13, 2017
    txls, Jun 13, 2017
    #9

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