custody

[qtfromwindsor]

my boyfriend is legally separated from his wife. in the separation agreement, he gave her full legal and physical custody of their three children thinking that she would be fair. he pays her much more child support than he is supposed to (he makes 39000 a year and pays her 1100 every four weeks), yet she sends no diapers or clothes to our house for them. she finds ridiculous reasons to keep them from him. now the oldest is starting kindergarten and she isn't letting him see her off to school because the mothers boyfriend is seeing her off to school. she threatened to call the police if he tries to see her on her first day of school. the baby (14 months) continuously has accidents, having an iron dropped on his head, falling out of a shopping cart, and the oldest ( 5 yrs) has the mouth of a drunken sailor. they are definitely in a bad environment. he wants custody but he doesn't know how to get it. Please help. thank you.

 

[presutin]

He needs to hire an attorney (as soon as possible) to change the previous custody agreement. His childrens' safety and well being are at risk here!

 

[irish223]

my boyfriend is legally separated from his wife. in the separation agreement, he gave her full legal and physical custody of their three children thinking that she would be fair. he pays her much more child support than he is supposed to (he makes 39000 a year and pays her 1100 every four weeks),

Is this court-ordered child support? How do you know it's more than he should pay? In Illinois, 3 children to support means 32% of his salary. What are HIS guidelines?

yet she sends no diapers or clothes to our house for them.

She doesn't have to send them. Can't he buy them things for his home so that they don't feel like visitors there?

she finds ridiculous reasons to keep them from him.

If she is denying his visitation on his court-ordered days, then he should file contempt.

now the oldest is starting kindergarten and she isn't letting him see her off to school because the mothers boyfriend is seeing her off to school. she threatened to call the police if he tries to see her on her first day of school.

If the first day of school is not one of his days, then she doesn't have to let him see her at home or take her to school. However, there's no reason he can't be at school when she arrives.

the baby (14 months) continuously has accidents, having an iron dropped on his head, falling out of a shopping cart, and the oldest ( 5 yrs) has the mouth of a drunken sailor. they are definitely in a bad environment.

I find it very odd that these very distressing concerns are not mentioned until the end of the post. Most people who are genuinely concerned about the children's safety will make it part of the title of their thread and also make it the focus of their post. The focus of your post was money. It seems that the safety issues were only mentioned as reasons why he wants custody. If the father is truly concerned about his children's safety, then he should have contacted CPS. If he wants custody because he doesn't want to pay the child support and doesn't like his visitation, it ain't gonna happen.

he wants custody but he doesn't know how to get it. Please help. thank you.

Hire a lawyer.

 

[qtfromwindsor]

1) youre a prick. 2) there are no court ordered days. it is stated that visitation will work around work and school schedules. 3) NYS 29 percent for three children. we're paying a extra 2 grand a year. 4) as for diapers and clothes, she is getting more of his take home pay than we are and we still have to support the kids three days a week for food clothes diapers. 5) i was giving background first.

 

[Duranie]

He can certainly ask for custody but he is going to have to prove mom unfit. He needs to get court ordered days. NY takes parental alienation very serious, he needs to document when mom doesn't allow him to see the kids when she first agreed but he needs to get specific dates and time for visitation.

He should talk to an attorney or google some fathers rights groups to see what the chances are of him securing custody.

 

[Michael Wechsler]

1) youre a prick. 2) there are no court ordered days. it is stated that visitation will work around work and school schedules. 3) NYS 29 percent for three children. we're paying a extra 2 grand a year. 4) as for diapers and clothes, she is getting more of his take home pay than we are and we still have to support the kids three days a week for food clothes diapers. 5) i was giving background first.

Hmmm... I can appreciate you're not happy about your situation but, let me remind you, that you've come here for advice and for people to comment on your problems. You're not exactly winning any friends by using this language and, quite frankly, we don't tolerate this kind of behavior here for the obvious reasons. I'm hoping that you and your boyfriend are a bit more respectful in court otherwise you'll see that a judge has even less tolerance.

That said, Irish is absolutely right. What were you expecting to hear? Your boyfriend miscalculated giving his ex custody and with the arrangements and undoing the agreement won't just magically happen. You can bet that if you get to court, you'll have to deal with the tough questions and better to hear them now and be prepared for when they are asked there.

 

[irish223]

the oldest ( 5 yrs) has the mouth of a drunken sailor.

youre a pr*ck.

Interesting.......

 

[qtfromwindsor]

advice is correct... legal advice... not your opinion of the situation.