Am I in for a fight?

[Ajlouis]

Jurisdiction

Florida

Okay so i'm going to make this short and sweet. I'm giving birth in 10 days, the father and I are no longer together or even on speaking terms because he is an actively using opiate and crack addict. His parents are not people I want in my child's life for a multitude of reasons. However, they (his parents) are insisting I should give them visitation. As far as I know, in the state of FL, since the father of my child aren't married, and I do not plan on signing any kind of legal document stating he is my child's father, my child therefore has no father. He would have to petition a family court to establish paternity. Would there be a way for his parents to circumvent that and force me to allow them to see my child? Do they even have a leg to stand on?

 

[army judge]

Would there be a way for his parents to circumvent that and force me to allow them to see my child? Do they even have a leg to stand on?

Yes, they could by stealth and the application of force, enter your home at night and gaze upon your child.

Seriously, grandparents have no rights to be in YOUR child's life.

I assume, if they're homo sapiens, they do have two legs upon which to stand.

Legally, they have no grounds to be in your life.

Shoo them away like the pests they appear to be, or ignore them.

 

[Ajlouis]

Yes, they could by stealth and the application of force, enter your home at night and gaze upon your child.

Seriously, grandparents have no rights to be in YOUR child's life.

I assume, if they're homo sapiens, they do have two legs upon which to stand.

Legally, they have no grounds to be in your life.

Shoo them away like the pests they appear to be, or ignore them.

Lol thank you for your response. Not only was it informative, but gave me a decent giggle I sorely needed.

 

[army judge]

Lol thank you for your response. Not only was it informative, but gave me a decent giggle I sorely needed.

No worries, humor (funny or not) can often let us giggle or guffaw.
Laughing is good medicine, and even if you're addicted, its not fattening. LOL

 

[leslie82]

Just don't talk to his family or him anymore. They can threaten you all they want but as you said until HE goes to court and files to establish paternity, none of them have a leg to stand on. They don't have any rights any of them right now or when that child enters the world.

No contact them and if you move or anything don't tell them. IF he files for paternity and it's established in court and a visitation order is mandated then you have to allow him. But then he will also have to pay child support so he sounds like the kind of guy who won't go through the trouble of court.

 

[Ajlouis]

Just don't talk to his family or him anymore. They can threaten you all they want but as you said until HE goes to court and files to establish paternity, none of them have a leg to stand on. They don't have any rights any of them right now or when that child enters the world.

No contact them and if you move or anything don't tell them. IF he files for paternity and it's established in court and a visitation order is mandated then you have to allow him. But then he will also have to pay child support so he sounds like the kind of guy who won't go through the trouble of court.

Thank you so much for your response as well. There was actually a new development yesterday...

I got texts from the father of my child in the middle of the night telling me he's going to seek visitation and i'm evil for denying him and his family that right etc etc. Then this afternoon his father contacted my mother bad mouthing me and telling her I owe him money for something he helped me with last year. I contacted the authorities and filed an incident report so I at least have documentation started that they're harassing us. Honestly this just feels like they're doing all of this to spite me. It's not because they truly even give a damn about my child, they just resent me so much they feel they have to make my life hell in the only way they can anymore. I also spoke to a lawyer this morning and he is on standby should I need him.

 

[army judge]

Thank you so much for your response as well. There was actually a new development yesterday...

I got texts from the father of my child in the middle of the night telling me he's going to seek visitation and i'm evil for denying him and his family that right etc etc. Then this afternoon his father contacted my mother bad mouthing me and telling her I owe him money for something he helped me with last year. I contacted the authorities and filed an incident report so I at least have documentation started that they're harassing us. Honestly this just feels like they're doing all of this to spite me. It's not because they truly even give a damn about my child, they just resent me so much they feel they have to make my life hell in the only way they can anymore. I also spoke to a lawyer this morning and he is on standby should I need him.

The baby has to be born before the man can file to establish his paternity.
That means a DNA test, that he'll try to get the state t pay for (the child's test, and his test).
If the state won't do it, he has to pay for BOTH tests.
Even IF he establishes paternity, the most he can expect is supervised visitation, that once more, he must pay for the social worker to oversee at a neutral site, not his home.

In about three to four years, IF he remains consistently in the child's life, he MIGHT be allowed overnight visits at his home.

Its been my experience with deadbeats, they rarely stay in anyone's life, preferring to bed hop and screw whatever he is allowed to penetrate.

He is using his care about the kid ruse, simply to get get back at you.

As suggested, block his texts, his emails, his telephone calls; change your personal details IF you have to to avoid him.

The last thing you need is to placate or engage a deadbeat, bully, scalawag, rascal, bamboozler.

Deadbeast and bullies love to threaten, but are far too lazy to take action.

In this case, there is NO legal action the deadbeat can do that will harm you or your child.

Stop listening to him and his bully parents.
Block all of them, block them everywhere, even if you have to delete your social media and create new, private profiles.

 

[leslie82]

Thank you so much for your response as well. There was actually a new development yesterday...

I got texts from the father of my child in the middle of the night telling me he's going to seek visitation and i'm evil for denying him and his family that right etc etc. Then this afternoon his father contacted my mother bad mouthing me and telling her I owe him money for something he helped me with last year. I contacted the authorities and filed an incident report so I at least have documentation started that they're harassing us. Honestly this just feels like they're doing all of this to spite me. It's not because they truly even give a damn about my child, they just resent me so much they feel they have to make my life hell in the only way they can anymore. I also spoke to a lawyer this morning and he is on standby should I need him.

Tell your parents and your family, friends to block him and his family. Block their numbers. Block them on social media. If you do that, then they can't harass you unless they come to your house and do it.

You definitely need to block this sperm donor. Let him go to court. Then he has to pay child support. Something tells me he doesn't want to do that. Well - he could still not pay anything but it would be in the system and he will just rack up more and more debt.

My ex owes me probably 900 by now. He's like $11,000+ for all four of his kids. But he has to pay it someday.

They probably are doing it to spite you. So don't lower yourself to that level. Block, block, block.

 

[ElleMD]

That said, this is the guy you chose to create a child with and if he does file to establish paternity, he is going to get at least some visitation. By extension, so will his parents. While he will likely owe some at least nominal amount of support, you can not withhold the child if he refuses to pay. you can take him back to court, but you do need to come to terms with the fact that this guy is the father you chose for this baby, and he does have a legal right to see the child once paternity has been established.

 

[leslie82]

Yeah but the fact is that he hasn't filed to establish and he and his parents are bullying her. Right now he has zero legal rights. So she has every right to block people who are harassing her in the middle of the night or showing up to her house uninvited. If they keep harassing her, she needs to call the police.

IF he files for paternity then yes she has to let him see the kid. But she can always fight it in court and maybe start out with supervised visitation for awhile.

 

[LdiJ]

I realize that this thread is a couple of weeks old but I wanted to add some information that was not discussed in the thread.

In Florida, grandparents have no legal standing to sue for visitation of grandchildren. Florida's Supreme Court found their grandparent visitation statute to be unconstitutional some 16 years ago and no new legislation on the issue has been written since then.

However, as others have mentioned, if dad decides to really be a dad and file to establish paternity, custody, visitation and child support, he would be able to allow his parents to visit with the child on his time.

If his parents are truly determined, and have any real influence on him, they may force him to file whether he wants to pay child support or not...particularly if they have any kind of real money.