A factor in child support or no?

[Joe Boik]

Jurisdiction

Pennsylvania

Hello...So my(Separated) wife is taking me to court for child support in PA. We share legal custody, she was recently awarded Primary Physical custody. The master decided, and the court papers show, That i am only to have or two boys from 3p to 7p, twice a week, and from 10a to 5p every other weekend.....BUT, in REALITY, i've been continuing to have them at my house in my care with overnights half of every week just as we always have before this new mandate. My question is, in decided the amount of child support, will the courts consider only what the Papers written by the master show, or will they consider how much time the boys spend with me in reality, and if so, how is the best way to prove this.....Other factors (She makes more money than me)

 

[zddoodah]

Are you saying that the court entered a custody and visitation order but has not yet entered a child support order?

If so, you need to make sure the court is aware that the circumstances are not as reflected in custody/visitation order so that the court makes its child support decision based on the most accurate information.

 

[Joe Boik]

So... Yes the physical custody had been decided at a family conference with a "Master". The child support issue is to be decided next week at court... So how do I prove that the kids are at my house WAY more than is mandated... And also will that even matter to the courts?

 

[justblue]

Hello...So my(Separated) wife is taking me to court for child support in PA. We share legal custody, she was recently awarded Primary Physical custody. The master decided, and the court papers show, That i am only to have or two boys from 3p to 7p, twice a week, and from 10a to 5p every other weekend.....BUT, in REALITY, i've been continuing to have them at my house in my care with overnights half of every week just as we always have before this new mandate. My question is, in decided the amount of child support, will the courts consider only what the Papers written by the master show, or will they consider how much time the boys spend with me in reality, and if so, how is the best way to prove this.....Other factors (She makes more money than me)

Why were you awarded such restrictive visitation by the master? How old are the children? Are there abuse/drinking/drugs allegations against you?

 

[Joe Boik]

I'll be open and own what I did... For the most part I am a dad who has a wonderful relationship with my kids and treats than with love And does everything a parent should do, but I WAS recently charged with a crime of a sexual nature...I guess to rate it in severity, i'd call it sexual harassment of a more blatent nature... It was That, combined with a somewhat recent history of DUI's and driving on DUI suspended license. The DUI's themselves were 6 years ago, and I haven't been a drinker for quite some time now..... BUT, you know how that goes... Someone saying they don't drink anymore tends to fall in def ears. Until my recent charge, the judge seemed to take my side on things, and even left on our last visit by saying he'd like to revisit this when I've gotten counseling.

I'll be open and own what I did... For the most part I am a dad who has a wonderful relationship with my kids and treats than with love And does everything a parent should do, but I WAS recently charged with a crime of a sexual nature...I guess to rate it in severity, i'd call it sexual harassment of a more blatent nature... It was That, combined with a somewhat recent history of DUI's and driving on DUI suspended license. The DUI's themselves were 6 years ago, and I haven't been a drinker for quite some time now..... BUT, you know how that goes... Someone saying they don't drink anymore tends to fall in def ears. Until my recent charge, the judge seemed to take my side on things, and even left on our last visit by saying he'd like to revisit this when I've gotten counseling.

Oh an sorry, they are 3 and 5

 

[army judge]

I WAS recently charged with a crime of a sexual nature


It was That, combined with a somewhat recent history of DUI's and driving on DUI suspended license. The DUI's themselves were 6 years ago, and I haven't been a drinker for quite some time now..... BUT, you know how that goes

A bunch of strangers on the internet who know NOTHING about you, your former spouse, your children, who may or may not be lawyers, who IF they are lawyers MIGHT not be licensed in LA are of no value to you where IMPORTANT matters like child support, child custody, and other alleged criminal activities (and/or charges) are at issue and being argued.

The best thing you can do is hire yourself a lawyer LICENSED to practice in LA (proficient in LA family law) to make sure your children and you receive the best outcome.

If you can'r or won't hire a lawyer, get used to having your pockets picked, your feelings abused, your fatherhood demeaned, and many other unpleasantries HEAPED in, around, and all over you!

 

[Joe Boik]

A bunch of strangers on the internet who know NOTHING about you, your former spouse, your children, who may or may not be lawyers, who IF they are lawyers MIGHT not be licensed in LA are of no value to you where IMPORTANT matters like child support, child custody, and other alleged criminal activities (and/or charges) are at issue and being argued.

The best thing you can do is hire yourself a lawyer LICENSED to practice in LA (proficient in LA family law) to make sure your children and you receive the best outcome.

If you can'r or won't hire a lawyer, get used to having your pockets picked, your feelings abused, your fatherhood demeaned, and many other unpleasantries HEAPED in, around, and all over you!

Yeah I get what your saying... And it is PA... But still all the same... And yeah, I really can't afford a lawyer...I still owe a lawyer from the first time we went to a family conference.

 

[Joe Boik]

But yes I'm finding that to be very true... That in many cases I'm just gonna have to get used to having the short end of the stick...I have no money, am probably about to have far less... And they're mom's family has TONS of money, so you can see where this is going. I just hold on to, looking at the big picture... Time will go on, and my boys are smart, one day a time will come when the boys are over 18, she can't take me to court, I can tell the boys the truth about on everytheverything, and just be glad it's over.

 

[stealthy1]

Time will go on, and my boys are smart, one day a time will come when the boys are over 18, she can't take me to court, I can tell the boys the truth about on everytheverything, and just be glad it's over.

It's funny. My ex used to say the same sort of thing - when the kids were adults, he was going to tell them "the truth" about me. In the intervening years? They saw "the truth" about both of us first hand. Would you care to guess which parent they see/speak with regularly and which they have no contact with?

Focus on being their parent, rather than a whiner.

 

[Zigner]

...one day a time will come when the boys are over 18, ... I can tell the boys the truth about on everytheverything ...

What a selfish, self-centered, and immature person you seem to be. I hope that you never burden your children with YOUR problems.

 

[Red Kayak]

I'll be open and own what I did... For the
most part I am a dad who has a wonderful relationship with my kids and treats than with love And does everything a parent should do, but I WAS recently charged with a crime of a sexual nature...I guess to rate it in severity, i'd call it sexual harassment of a more blatent nature... It was That, combined with a somewhat recent history of DUI's and driving on DUI suspended license. The DUI's themselves were 6 years ago, and I haven't been a drinker for quite some time now..... BUT, you know how that goes... Someone saying they don't drink anymore tends to fall in def ears. Until my recent charge, the judge seemed to take my side on things, and even left on our last visit by saying he'd like to revisit this when I've gotten counseling.

Oh an sorry, they are 3 and 5

I think it would be in your best interest to not try and change the order and accept child support calculations based on the current court approved parenting plan.

Just be glad your visitation isn't supervised.

 

[leslie82]

I'll be open and own what I did... For the most part I am a dad who has a wonderful relationship with my kids and treats than with love And does everything a parent should do, but I WAS recently charged with a crime of a sexual nature...I guess to rate it in severity, i'd call it sexual harassment of a more blatent nature... It was That, combined with a somewhat recent history of DUI's and driving on DUI suspended license. The DUI's themselves were 6 years ago, and I haven't been a drinker for quite some time now..... BUT, you know how that goes... Someone saying they don't drink anymore tends to fall in def ears. Until my recent charge, the judge seemed to take my side on things, and even left on our last visit by saying he'd like to revisit this when I've gotten counseling.

I'll be open and own what I did... For the most part I am a dad who has a wonderful relationship with my kids and treats than with love And does everything a parent should do, but I WAS recently charged with a crime of a sexual nature...I guess to rate it in severity, i'd call it sexual harassment of a more blatent nature... It was That, combined with a somewhat recent history of DUI's and driving on DUI suspended license. The DUI's themselves were 6 years ago, and I haven't been a drinker for quite some time now..... BUT, you know how that goes... Someone saying they don't drink anymore tends to fall in def ears. Until my recent charge, the judge seemed to take my side on things, and even left on our last visit by saying he'd like to revisit this when I've gotten counseling.

Oh an sorry, they are 3 and 5

Charged with a crime of a sexual nature...DUI history...

Perhaps do what the judge said and get some counseling. Get your crap together - and stop finding ways to make your ex look like the "bad guy" and focus on your life.

Also - no never tell your kids "the truth." Kids know the truth. For example - my mom had an affair half my parents' marriage which resulted in my youngest brother. We did not know he was the result until the divorce. She was never around growing up - guess who we talk to more? Until like six years ago, I had nothing to do with her but made amends and she finally grew up and realized what a mistake she made choosing that pos over us. Her husband likes to act like our dad "brainwashed" us but we saw it. We saw her come home with black eye. We saw her choose him over us. We experienced the verbal and emotional abuse from her. My dad didn't ever say one word about our mother even after their divorce. It was not until maybe a few years ago he started to say things like she used to be crazy and people warned him she was crazy when he met her in college but he didn't listen. But he never said a bad word about her even after she left and filed for divorce - or while she cheated on him - and so on.

So be an adult and don't drag your kids into stuff. If my daughter ever asks me why I divorced her dad someday I will tell her why - but have never put him down in front of her and I won't.