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5 year visitation battle

Discussion in 'Child Custody & Visitation' started by SoggyCoffee, Jan 17, 2021.

  1. SoggyCoffee

    SoggyCoffee Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Looking for advice, on how to proceed...
    For the past 5 years I have been fighting for visitation with my son who is now 8.
    Story and time line.
    2012 had a son with a ex girlfriend. Visits were regular somewhat as I worked out of town alot I would work 3 weeks on, one week off and during that week off I would get my son, the order at the time was she had primary placement no orders regarding placement.
    In 2014 I got injured at work crushed three discs in my spine, then visits were more often. I then went through all the medical that you would expect with that type of injury while still paying full support though I wasn't working. So two years after injury docs and specialist tell me I can't do my job any more. So work comp settlement etc... So I then in 2016 file in court to have my support and visitation adjusted to what the specialist said I could expect to make 20% of my previous income.
    As soon as I file my son's mom stops all visits.
    So armed with surgeons and doctors and vocation reports i go to court without an attorney.... Her attorney immediately has reports thrown out as hearsay. They order a GAL.
    GAL recommends that I have limited temporary order of 1 day a month.(based on that I haven't had any visits despite pictures and me saying I was having visits up till I filed) And because I don't have a license, if I show up without a license I forfeit my visit and next months visit.
    I then hire a attorney, by this time it's 2017 my first priority for him is to get the support changed, as you can imagine it's stacking up was up to 8k by then, and to get the visits changed. So I give my attorney all my doctor's note along with the state work comp notes (Certified). This attorney files on my behalf, her attorney then has the records thrown out as hearsay, attorney tells me we need to file again. So we file again, armed with doctors surgeons etc.. her attorney then has it dismissed as to much te has passed since my last doctors (despite it being a permanent injury). So I'm confused don't understand why and how this is possible, I get on my attorney about this. He does nothing. Now 2019 her attorney files a contempt against me for failure to pay. Now 24k in back support. We go to court my attorney argues I can not pay this because of my injury, judge not having it want to put me in jail!!! Child support is against it because I have sent them all my medical from the beginning, lawyers tries again to use records her attorney again says hearsay, judge gives my attorney te to get certified, I ask my attorney how the hell am I supposed to do that? He takes care of it go back to court the dismiss the contempt. I then yell at my attorney and fire him for the fact why didn't he do that 2 years ago. Hire another attorney with the very last money I have. He files asks for the back support to be adjusted nope, then her attorney has it dismissed because I didn't give my bank statements, by this time I'm broke, I don't have a bank account can't open a bank account because of the child support. And my injury has progressed. I can't pay my attorney anymore. I have a surgery scheduled. Doctors have completely disabled me ended losing all feeling and 60% strength of my left side. I file with ssdi get it immediately take that to court. Finnaly judge lowers support to 0$. I hire hire the second attorney again to tackle the visits. Her attorney takes me to court on several motions like , no smoking in house, (even though I didn't or never have) to give him his inhaler, I have to enroll him as a tribal member, I have to write down my culture. That we have to communicate with a third party app etc... Finally we get to the point of a GAL get the report he doesn't change a thing, despite evidence of mother withholding visits, doesn't mention any of my concerns, states I have a drinking problem because of a DUI from almost a decade ago, but doesn't say the same about her or her live in boyfriend who have 5 DUIs between them. Makes no mention of culture etc completely one sided, and still doing the punitive punishment of license. I send the GAL a email after I see his report and explain to him how this seems like a racially stereotypes report. Which he ignores of course. Then receive GAL bill. Not only does it show that he ignored my phone call and emails during his "investigating" but he spoke with the opposing attorney more than he did with me or mother?????? So my attorney ask for him to remove himself due to these facts supported by case law. Then mother's attorney replied defending GAL and then says I'm just making up the racial stuff because I didn't put my culture in that third party app???
    And what I mean by culture they want me to explain my culture I guess... I not sure how I explain thousands of years of traditions and teachings.... I know this doesn't seem right I believe with everything this can't be legal or right. I have faith iny current attorney but he's not the most expensive attorney out there , and I think he's over worked. I need help I have called every help place and either they don't do custody or I need to be a victim of violence. I just want to see my son and have meaningful visits with him. Is there anyone I can talk to that help or any legal advice anything that anyone can help with would be great....
    Thanks for reading and taking your time with this
     
  2. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    That was a mistake.
    You allowed her to out lawyer you!

    I suggest you speak with a couple attorneys about the best way to proceed today.

    You can also search for support groups that will assist a father in your position.

    If you are a member of a recognized Native American tribe (as I am, Comanche and Apache), our tribal government offers assistance to parents such as yourself.

    You also want to get the child enrolled and documented as a tribal member. Most tribes pay their members a monthly stipend, especially if the tribe operates commercial enterprises. It'll also be a great way to provide cultural information when required.

    One tip, ALWAYS speak about how a father in her/his child's life benefits the child.

    Never be seen as battling against the kid's mom, rather be seen as battling to be in the child's life.
     
  3. SoggyCoffee

    SoggyCoffee Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I don't think I was out lawyered my previous attorney was negligent.
    And now I'm dealing with systematic racism just for the simple fact that I have to write down my culture. Who's ever heard of that??? And how do you write down thousands of years of teaching and traditions???
    And the opposing counsel working and defending the GAL how is that not a huge conflict of interest???
    Me and my kids are enrolled as tribal members.
    Never heard of a tribe helping in civil matters where they don't have jurisdiction. I have spoken with three local tribes as well as my own none offer any assistance. And most tribes do not have percap (stipend) actually very few do.
    And I do refer to this as a battle against a system working against me.
    I have called every help place available either they don't help in my area or I need to be a victim of domestic violence.... As I have already spent my life savings on this case I need suggestions on someone who is going to stick up for my rights.
     
  4. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    I've not only heard about it, I've read about it, and I've even seen it done.
    My ancestors suffered great abuse, treachery, and discrimination.
    However, as one who claims his Native American ancestry, I've never suffered discrimination.
    That is to not to say someone hasn't only that I haven't.
    If you BELONG to any nationally recognized Native American Tribe, somewhere in the tribal office you can obtain the history of the tribe, assuming you are a member.

    If not, most tribes are happy to share with curious people, the history of the tribe.
    That, of course, would include the tribe's teachings and culture.

    I wasn't there when the Apaches and the Comanches of the 19th century began it, however tribal leaders and elders have shown me the proof in black and white.

    I'm told that the minimum paid is zero because the tribe is poorly funded.

    The Shakopee Mdewakanton (Mdewakanton Sioux) are believed to be the richest tribe in American history as measured by individual personal wealth: Each adult, according to court records and confirmed by one tribal member, receives a monthly payment of around $84,000, or $1.08 million a year. This was reported by the NY Times on Aug 9, 2012. I'm certain the Native American millionaires receive far more money today (as in 2021).

    Shakopee Mdewakanton Tribe: Casino revenue pays each member $1million a year | Daily Mail Online



    Cuevas' tribe operates the Pechanga Resort and Casino, the largest in California. By some estimates, it earns from $1-2 billion annually and pays allotments to each tribal member of $300,000 or more a year.

    The Big Money

    Casino wealth and well-being: The tale of two tribes - StarTribune.com


    You are free to believe whatever you wish to believe.


    I can offer you no advice on how you solve your problems.

    I wish you all the best as you endeavor to do what is best for you and yours.
     
  5. PayrollHRGuy

    PayrollHRGuy Well-Known Member

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    Wow!!!
     
  6. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    I can't recall the tribe, but those members get even more money thanks to their booming casino and oil businesses.
     

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