Need reasons why?

[thumperx2]

I am struggling with telling my 13 year old about her bio-father. My husband is legally & on a daily basis her father/daddy. But now bio-father is poking around deciding he knows what's best for a child he didn't want. A few people have all posted how I should've been honest with my child ect ect. I have been honest with my child in my opinion. I am not looking for bashing or how much everyone disagrees with the situation I am in now. I would just like to know some reasons on why so many people feel that my daughter should know now........I've heard the she's got a right reason already, which I agree with but why should she have the right to know now?

TIA

 

[calalily]

So that she doesn't find out through the bio-dad that she was adopted by your husband. If he is threatening to contact her, he eventually will make good on the threat. Do you want her to find out from him first, or you. It's that simple.

 

[thumperx2]

So that she doesn't find out through the bio-dad that she was adopted by your husband. If he is threatening to contact her, he eventually will make good on the threat. Do you want her to find out from him first, or you. It's that simple.

true...I don't want her to hear it from him.....but from my side I feel that I would be talking to her because bio-father has pushed the issue, not because I felt that the timing in my daughters life was right. There is damage no matter what way I look....but why should I tell her when as a minor there's nothing she can do about the situation? As an adult it would be her decision on what she would want to do to deal with bio-father. Hope that makes some sense.....