Divorce under false pretenses

[zolat1]

Jurisdiction

Arizona

My (ex) husband and I were just divorced on Monday the 23rd of May. We pretty much agreed on most everything except alimony but I caved a bit just to get things done in a timely manner. Anyway, 4 days later, he decides to drop a bombshell on us (our daughter and myself, together) by inviting us to breakfast and just outside proceeds to tell us that "as you have probably have guessed, I am seeing someone." OK, why are you telling us this, in front of our daughter??? He proceeds to say that he is already living with her and that when visitation starts that not only will our daughter not have her own room like previously planned and discussed but that she will be sharing a room with another 13 year old girl (his girlfriend's daughter). I asked our daughter to go get in the vehicle and proceeded to tell him that this was not the time or the place to drop this on us and it was too soon for her to have to deal with. My point is that she has enough to process with the divorce less than a week ago but now he wants her to process sharing a room with another 13 year old teenaged girl. Too soon. It is now summer and the agreed upon time was under the pretense that he was getting a place for her to have space of her own (since we just moved to separate places at the beginning of the month). Otherwise, I would have put provisions for her to be able to prepare and assimilate to that type of situation. I just think it should have been brought up to me first before dropping it on her like that in public and even before her first visitation started. Is there some injunction or something that I could do since we just had this signed by the judge 4 days ago? I know that is a lot of information but even our daughter says she isn't ready for that yet, psychologically-emotionally.

 

[army judge]

All you can do, if you feel you must do something, is take the matter back to court.

Your matter will eventually be heard, but little will change.

Your former husband is a class AAA creep, for sure, so be glad you're no longer married.

Creeps like him often take little interest in their children, so that might be your saving grace.

In a few weeks, he's likely to be cheating on his current honey.

Tell the child to hang in there, grin and bear it, because the court order must be obeyed.

Don't count on getting that child support, either.
He's likely to spend that money on the new honey.

 

[adjusterjack]

Is there some injunction or something that I could do since we just had this signed by the judge 4 days ago?

No. There is nothing you can do until he actually breaches any of the terms and conditions of the decree or puts your daughter is a dangerous or unhealthy environment.

If the decree didn't specify that your daughter have a room of her own during visitation, there is nothing any judge will do about her sharing a room.

Who knows, your daughter might end up liking the other girl and they'll have fun together.

I understand there is hostility between you and your ex but your daughter is not too young to learn that life has rules and often they aren't kind. Don't bring her into your anger. It'll screw her up.

 

[zolat1]

No. There is nothing you can do until he actually breaches any of the terms and conditions of the decree or puts your daughter is a dangerous or unhealthy environment.

If the decree didn't specify that your daughter have a room of her own during visitation, there is nothing any judge will do about her sharing a room.

Who knows, your daughter might end up liking the other girl and they'll have fun together.

I understand there is hostility between you and your ex but your daughter is not too young to learn that life has rules and often they aren't kind. Don't bring her into your anger. It'll screw her up.

There was no hostility throughout the whole divorce process. It was done all with consent and in a friendly manner.... the only animosity was when he dropped this on our daughter and in the way he did it - 4 days after it was finalized. My anger is only that he is not thinking of how it will affect our daughter by her processing the divorce on Monday and now having to share space (a house) with strangers on her first visitation. I just think he should have thought about easing her into this a bit more. I still think it is too soon to just throw her into it - emotionally.

I know there's nothing that in the papers that says she has to have her own room but it is something he said to her (which is a trust issue between her and her dad since she feel he lied to her about it - that is something they will have to work on to fix) but we have tried our best to do things that don't screw her up in the past, why would he not think this would wouldn't have some negative impact on her? Rhetorical, of course..

I'm sure the other girl is nice and our daughter may end up liking her and they probably would have fun together; that is not the point. It is just a lot to process all at once for her.