"Mother in law" comes into town to help my girlfriend with a potential serious medical issue with worst case being Leukemia. I agreed to leave our rental house for a few days to avoid conflict with her mom. I tried entering my home to see my 2 year son and her mom shoved me and told me i do not live there anymore. I call police and have them talk to mom and GF and they tell them that my name is on the lease and that i am allowed to be in my home. To keep it a civil matter the officer did not report that her mom shoved me. I agreed to work with her for a few more days but that i need to be able to get in the home. After a couple of more days and no place to stay i come home to find a list of things to do before she moves back to Kansas with her parents. I confront her and tell her that she can not leave the state of Colorado where we reside in Douglas County. The next day she files a temporary restraining order on me so i can not be at the house see my son or her 2 children from her previous marriage for 14 days until a court date. She is claiming verbal abuse and that i use drugs. She is givin temporary custody of my son. Can she now leave the state with my son? Do i counter file against her? How do i get this order lifted? It says on the document that the court will decide will determine who should receive temporary care and control of the minor for up to 120 days. If she does leave with my son out of state and the order is lifted does she have to bring him back or will I have to fight her in Kansas? I can not afford a lawyer. I have been working part time and she was the primary bread winner and I was "Mr. Mom" bending my work availability around her work obligations. Lucky for me my boss has been flexible to my situation. Girlfriend has lost her current job and i believe is going to play medical angle. What is my best stadegy? I have prayed that the good lord give me guidance and to bless me with someone to help me with my legal advice. I believe the lord will reunite me with my son Luke.
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desperate father needs help
- Thread Starter shaneluke
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You need to see an attorney and file for custody. also there should be a hearing on the RO, it sounds like that can easily be dropped. If I were you, avoid allowing mom in the house in the future.
It's time to get a full time job and get some income. You can call around and see if any attorney can help you, or go down to the family court and see if they have a law library/family court fascilitator that can point you in the right direction.
Do whatever possible to retain counsel as if tyou wife leaves the state, she must meet the residency/jurisdiction requirements before she files. If you file in your state, that gives you the upper hand.
Act now.
It's time to get a full time job and get some income. You can call around and see if any attorney can help you, or go down to the family court and see if they have a law library/family court fascilitator that can point you in the right direction.
Do whatever possible to retain counsel as if tyou wife leaves the state, she must meet the residency/jurisdiction requirements before she files. If you file in your state, that gives you the upper hand.
Act now.
Scooterdog
New Member
You need to rebut the false accusations.
She can not legally leave the state(such as move).
Where was your son born? If CO, then that is where you will file for custody(unless she beats you to the punch)
Your best stratagy is to file for custody befor she does. A proper response to those false aligations is very important. IF, not saying you are, but if you are doing ANY drugs, it would be a good time to start getting your system clean. You can rebut the drug accusation if you are clean by a test.
Where is your son now?
Son was born in Kansas we lived there until he was 9 monthes old then moved to North Carolina for 1 year and currently we have resided in Colorado for 5 monthes. Reside requirements for custody in CO is 6 monthes. My son is now at my home in CO and she plans on leaving for Kansas end of the week. Do i request a court ordered drug test? Do i request one at the TRO hearing? Can she leave the state with my son?
Scooterdog
New Member
No, don't request a drug test. Rebut the complaint she has filed against you. Rebut every point with fact.
Can she leave the state with my son? Yes.
You have to file a petition for custody to enforce your rights as dad. The problem is, you haven't made the six months you need to make. Never the less, one should file in CO, by the time there is a hearing the six month will have been met. I doubt she will find a lawyer to rebut your petition in a few short weeks. You can then argue at the hearing(if she challanges it) that the six months has been made according to the UCCJA.
Now, if she leaves, you stand a very good chance of having to go to Kansas to fight this out. You could try filing in CO, but both courts are bound by the UCCJA. They would probably go with the birth state if this occurs.
File a petition, request that the mother not be allowed to leave the state.
Mother cannot take child out of state if that prevents "meaningful" relationship between father and child. WEISS V. WEISS, 436 NYS 2d 862, 52 NY 2d 170 (1981) See also:
DAGHIR V. DAGHIR, 82 AD 2d 191 (NY 1981)
MUNFORD V. SHAW, 84 A.D. 2d 810, 444 NYS 2d 137 (1981)
SIPOS V. SIPOS, 73 AD 2d 1055, 425 NYS 2d 414 (1980)
PRIEBE V. PRIEBE, 81 AD2d 746, 438, NYS 2d 413 (1981)
STRAHL V. STRAHL, 66 AD 2d 571, 414 NYS 2d 184 (1979)
O'SHEA V. BRENNAN, 88 Misc.2d 233, 387 NYS 2d 212 (1976)
WARD V. WARD, 150 CA 2d 438, 309 P.2d 965 (Calif. 1957)
MARRIAGE OF SMITH, 290 Or.567, 624 P.2d 114 (Oregon 1981)
MEIER AND MEIER, 286 Or. 437, 595 P.2d 474 (1979), 47 Or. App. 110, 613 P.2d 763 (Oregon 1980)All of these cases deal with preventing the custodial mother from taking the child out of the jurisdiction.
Can she leave the state with my son? Yes.
You have to file a petition for custody to enforce your rights as dad. The problem is, you haven't made the six months you need to make. Never the less, one should file in CO, by the time there is a hearing the six month will have been met. I doubt she will find a lawyer to rebut your petition in a few short weeks. You can then argue at the hearing(if she challanges it) that the six months has been made according to the UCCJA.
Now, if she leaves, you stand a very good chance of having to go to Kansas to fight this out. You could try filing in CO, but both courts are bound by the UCCJA. They would probably go with the birth state if this occurs.
File a petition, request that the mother not be allowed to leave the state.
Mother cannot take child out of state if that prevents "meaningful" relationship between father and child. WEISS V. WEISS, 436 NYS 2d 862, 52 NY 2d 170 (1981) See also:
DAGHIR V. DAGHIR, 82 AD 2d 191 (NY 1981)
MUNFORD V. SHAW, 84 A.D. 2d 810, 444 NYS 2d 137 (1981)
SIPOS V. SIPOS, 73 AD 2d 1055, 425 NYS 2d 414 (1980)
PRIEBE V. PRIEBE, 81 AD2d 746, 438, NYS 2d 413 (1981)
STRAHL V. STRAHL, 66 AD 2d 571, 414 NYS 2d 184 (1979)
O'SHEA V. BRENNAN, 88 Misc.2d 233, 387 NYS 2d 212 (1976)
WARD V. WARD, 150 CA 2d 438, 309 P.2d 965 (Calif. 1957)
MARRIAGE OF SMITH, 290 Or.567, 624 P.2d 114 (Oregon 1981)
MEIER AND MEIER, 286 Or. 437, 595 P.2d 474 (1979), 47 Or. App. 110, 613 P.2d 763 (Oregon 1980)All of these cases deal with preventing the custodial mother from taking the child out of the jurisdiction.
A fool shall dig his own grave
I think i fell into their trap. I had previously told her that i did not want to move back to Kansas and that i would fight her from leaving the state of CO with my son. When she realized that i was not going to stay out of the house she did the TRO. So now she can leave the state with my son and when i go to Kansas i will probably have the same TRO waiting for me there as well. Plus in Kansas if you are not married when the child is born the father has no parental rights until he goes to court for the right to establish paternity. I am starting to think that she does not plan on showing up at the TRO hearing in CO. What can i do then?
I think i fell into their trap. I had previously told her that i did not want to move back to Kansas and that i would fight her from leaving the state of CO with my son. When she realized that i was not going to stay out of the house she did the TRO. So now she can leave the state with my son and when i go to Kansas i will probably have the same TRO waiting for me there as well. Plus in Kansas if you are not married when the child is born the father has no parental rights until he goes to court for the right to establish paternity. I am starting to think that she does not plan on showing up at the TRO hearing in CO. What can i do then?
Scooterdog
New Member
I explained what you need to do in the post above.
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