Child molester dating mom

[MrsHig]

Jurisdiction

California

I am writing to try to get info for my brother. He is currently going through a divorce with 3 minor children. Currently, he has about 35% custody of them. They agreed to this arrangement based on work schedules. This was before my brother found out that her current boyfriend (who we are unsure is living with her) is a child molester. After simple digging on the counties court website, it was obvious what he was convicted of (3 counts of unlawful sex with a minor), but also charges that were filed and later dropped because of plea deal (sexual penetration with object minor under 16, oral copulation minor under 16). The boyfriend was 25, the victim was 16. He got a $70 fine and 3 years probation. When my brother brought this to his exes attention she denied it. What actions can he take? Is there anything he can legally do to protect his children? At this point he'd rearrange his work schedule to protect them, but will the courts even look at the case given they just signed a child custody agreement about a month ago?

 

[cbg]

how old are the children in question?

 

[zddoodah]

He is currently going through a divorce with 3 minor children.

So...a petition for dissolution of marriage has actually been filed? Does your brother have an attorney?

Currently, he has about 35% custody of them.

I assume that this means that the kids spend approximately 35% of their time with your brother. If so, is this pursuant to a court order, or is it just the way things have worked out?

What actions can he take?

He can seek whatever court order he believes is appropriate under the circumstances.

 

[army judge]

will the courts even look at the case given they just signed a child custody agreement about a month ago?

Yes, our courts allow anyone to bring forth a claim or initiate a lawsuit.

You should suggest to your brother that he speak a couple family law attorneys.

Divorced fathers support groups can also be helpful:


8 Fathers' and Men's Rights Organizations in the United States

Divorce Support Groups For Men: 5 Popular Divorced Dad Support Groups

California Directory of Divorce Support Groups - Divorce HQ

Divorced Dads and Support Groups – National Center for Men

Divorced Dads groups

 

[Zigner]

What if mom is only seeing child-molester BF on dad's 35% of of the time?

 

[MrsHig]

how old are the children in question?

12, 5 and 4

 

[MrsHig]

What if mom is only seeing child-molester BF on dad's 35% of of the time?

Does that make it better? Anyway, back to the question, the eldest child has met him and spent time with him. The younger two children have not (as far as my brother knows).

 

[MrsHig]

Yes, our courts allow anyone to bring forth a claim or initiate a lawsuit.

You should suggest to your brother that he speak a couple family law attorneys.

Divorced fathers support groups can also be helpful:


8 Fathers' and Men's Rights Organizations in the United States

Divorce Support Groups For Men: 5 Popular Divorced Dad Support Groups

California Directory of Divorce Support Groups - Divorce HQ

Divorced Dads and Support Groups – National Center for Men

Divorced Dads groups

Thanks for the groups.
I was under the impression that you cannot bring forth a new custody agreement within 6 months of the other one being signed. Is this not the case?

 

[MrsHig]

So...a petition for dissolution of marriage has actually been filed? Does your brother have an attorney?

Yes it has. It was supposed to be signed a few weeks ago but there was a mistake in the dates and she did not sign it (understandably).

I assume that this means that the kids spend approximately 35% of their time with your brother. If so, is this pursuant to a court order, or is it just the way things have worked out?

This was an agreement that they mutually agreed upon and it was signed by the courts. I am under the impression that he cannot bring a change in custody this soon after signing one, that he must wait 6 months.

He can seek whatever court order he believes is appropriate under the circumstances.

 

[Zigner]

I believe that, if she is bringing him around the kids, or has him living with the kids, then it would represent a change of circumstances that could warrant a review. In fact, if either is happening, a call to the police would be in order.

 

[Zigner]

Does that make it better?

It would make a difference. If mom doesn't have the kids around him at all, then there's nothing to complain about. Of course, your additional information makes mine a moot point.

 

[cbg]

Someone who was interested in a 16 year old at age 25, is not going to be going after children of 4 and 5. Or even 12.

 

[adjusterjack]

my brother found out that her current boyfriend (who we are unsure is living with her) is a child molester. After simple digging on the counties court website, it was obvious what he was convicted of (3 counts of unlawful sex with a minor), but also charges that were filed and later dropped because of plea deal (sexual penetration with object minor under 16, oral copulation minor under 16). The boyfriend was 25, the victim was 16. He got a $70 fine and 3 years probation.

Which leads me to suspect that this was a misguided romantic relationship with a teenager and he's not really a pedophile.

 

[zddoodah]

I was under the impression that you cannot bring forth a new custody agreement within 6 months of the other one being signed. Is this not the case?

Let's put it this way: if there's real substance to the allegations you made in this thread, your brother would be justified seeking a change to the existing custody/visitation order.

I noticed that you ignored my question about whether your brother has an attorney. If he doesn't, this is not the sort of thing he ought to try to do without one.

 

[cbg]

Which leads me to suspect that this was a misguided romantic relationship with a teenager and he's not really a pedophile.

That was kind of my point too. Thanks for the corroboration.

 

[MrsHig]

Let's put it this way: if there's real substance to the allegations you made in this thread, your brother would be justified seeking a change to the existing custody/visitation order.

I noticed that you ignored my question about whether your brother has an attorney. If he doesn't, this is not the sort of thing he ought to try to do without one.

Yea didn't mean to not answer that... he does have an attorney and has a meeting with him on Thursday. However, I just wanted to get info on what he should expect or ask and things of that sort. This is really a blow to him (and us as a family) with this new knowledge and her nonchalant attitude towards it (my brother confronted her and she had an excuse of his actions "he didn't do it").

 

[MrsHig]

Which leads me to suspect that this was a misguided romantic relationship with a teenager and he's not really a pedophile.

Well $70 fine was because of Californias Assembly bill 1950. The probation unsure, but looks to be based on a plea deal.
As for a misguided romantic relationship... I guess that's the difference between what people think is ok or "misguided". To me, a grown man (or woman) knows better... mostly that big of an age gap. Given it says under 16, that victim could have been younger... it's all unknown right now. He preyed upon a younger person and took advantage. He's a predator... plain and simple. And given that I have a 12 year old nephew in the mix, makes me afraid of what he's capable of doing. But of course, that's my opinion with predators and sex offenders.

 

[cbg]

You know, even honest to goodness pedophiles have "tastes". If he's "into" teenagers, the four and five year olds will be of no interest to him. If his arrest was for assault on a girl, a boy is not going to be on his radar.

I am not in any way, shape or form defending him. I find preying on children just as repulsive as you do. But I still maintain that from what you've stated, your brother's children are unlikely to be in danger.

 

[adjusterjack]

This is really a blow to him (and us as a family) with this new knowledge and her nonchalant attitude towards it (my brother confronted her and she had an excuse of his actions "he didn't do it").

I have another guess. Your brother's marriage fell apart. She's already got a boyfriend. He's pissed and looking for a way to stick it to her. No surprise that you're in his corner.

Make no mistake, I also think that the 25 year old man is a scumbag for having sex with a teenager. But he's paying for that mistake and now he's going with an adult woman and not another teenager.

 

[army judge]

Is this not the case?

Your brother needs to discuss the potential problem with a family law attorney.

Alternatively, a divorced father's rights group might have other potential options.

Those are HIS children, too.

If he cares, he needs to not delay or wait, he should IMMEDIATELY get engaged and involved, before the alleged child molester takes matters into his evil hands!!!

The vast majority of convicted pedophiles are PROHIBITED from being in the presence of minor children.

A call to a local police agency or district attorney might yield quick, almost immediate relief!!!!