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Wrongfully asking for 26 thousand dollars in Arrearages

Discussion in 'Alimony & Spousal Support' started by queenycp, Jan 28, 2002.

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  1. queenycp

    queenycp Law Topic Starter New Member

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    It has now been 10 years since the divorce of my ex wife and I. Eight of those years, we have gotten along beautifully. Ever since the divorce, we never went back to court because we agreed on everything. Until 2 years ago, when I decided to get married. Since then, my ex has restricted and reduced my visitation w/ my daughter. I put up w/ her jealousy for almost 2 years till all of us couldn't handle it anymore (my, my wife, and my 14 year old daughter as well). Needless to say, after 13 years of separation, I decided to take her back to court to modify visitation and won. But not without being wrongfully accused of being an absent father, and being dipicted like a dead beat dad. Needless to say, my daughter proved her mother wrong and was granted 50/50 visitation. Sigh. But one month after I filed for visitation modification, my ex filed for 26 THOUSAND dollars in back child support. And the judge is buying it. Ever since we divorced, we agreed on everythig: Verbally. We never legally modified anything. 10 years ago, she had asked me to pay child care AND private school tuition.
    The original divorce papers read "Respondent (me) shall pay DIRECTLY to the babysitter in the amount of 85.00 per week for child care, on behalf of the mother and as for child support..." "...However, in the event that the babysitting charge is less than 85.00 per week, Respondent (me) shall recieve credit for said amount".
    Ever since our divorce it was clear that I was to pay child care, which I did. But a year after the divorce papers were written, child care reduced because my daugter started private school. Well rather than paying the difference of the babysitting charge to my ex, SHE asked me to just pay for her tuition so she didn't have to pay it and because it balanced everything out. I agreed and did so for the next 8 years. Now she is suing. But what's upsetting is that in her first OSC (order to show cause papers) she is including the tuition payments i made as child support but yet still saying that i owed her 18 grand in arrearages. Her figures were WAY off. But now that I've been able to prove that I paid a lot more than she is giving me credit for, she is now saying that I should have paid her rather than paying the school. And the judge is agreeing! Please give me some advice to save me and my family from losing this battle. I was such a good person to her and a good father for all these years to be screwed like this. It just doesn't seem fair. We're going to lose our home and my wife will have to go back to work and our baby will have to go to a child care facility. We don't have to money to do this. The judge had also asked us to find a case where Private school tuition was considered as child support. Do you know of such a case or do you know how i'd find out?
    Terry:(
     
  2. Michael Wechsler

    Michael Wechsler Administrator Staff Member

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    Do you have legal representation? That is a significant amount of money. A court can modify the amount retroactively. In addition to a case involving the tuition payments, you may also want to seek cases involving retaliatory actions. If you have representation, your attorney should not only have access to these cases, but should also be able to provide more. If you don't have representation, I would seek it, especially since it seems the case is going against you (we can help you find representation if necessary). It might be a good investment at this point.
     
  3. queenycp

    queenycp Law Topic Starter New Member

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    arrearages

    yes, we do have representation, but now we are looking into hiring another attorney to help us. However we are still in desperate need of a case that used TUITION as child support even though the divorce papers don't specify that. Another type of case that might be helpful are cases that rule in favor of someone trying to argue about a verbal agreement w/o any written proof. do you know of any? please help if possible. thank you.
    Terry
     
  4. Michael Wechsler

    Michael Wechsler Administrator Staff Member

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    Perhaps I'm not reading your reply properly, but I'm not sure why an additional attorney would be required. Your current attorney should have all the tools necessary to perform such a search. Additionally, your attorney would know the specific facts of your case that would be ideal for such research -- while cases may appear similar, the subtleties between them can be of critical importance. If the judge is "buying it", it implies to me that there is a reason that the judge is moving towards the illogical position. While it could be ignorance, your attorney will know why -- is there a case that the judge is relying on, some precedent, the judge's own "general feelings of equity?" There could be dozens of cases that meet the criteria of your post, but only a handful that might actually be relevant to address the specific point or points that need and/or should be addressed. Additionally, many of these cases will be of limited assistance if they are not within the jurisdiction that you are in (state and local laws and decisions vary).

    TheLaw.com provides legal research at a very low cost and, when we do so, we are sure to obtain a specific question that needs to be answered. I'd speak to your attorney first since he/she is in the best position to perform this research, which seems simple enough.
     
  5. Houndog97

    Houndog97 New Member

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    This is a joke, back in 97 when I had a heart attack and could'nt work all the judge could say is that my child support could not be reduced because I did'nt file the court papers. Now your ex is saying she wants back child support and has'nt filed in years? Is this a two way street or one way? Sounds like a joke! Gets me pissed! I'm sitting in a hospital still having to pay child support after having a heart attack. I'll never forget that for as long as I live.
     

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