What has happened to this world!

[hayley3]

I'm an older mother. I married a man that left his two children ages 9 and 12 to move with me to another state. He hardly ever called them. They are now 25 and 21.
This man I married eventually turns into an alcoholic, although I hoped that one day he will come to his senses. After the birth of our daughter, he gets worse and worse. He becomes a falling down drunk on his time off, not ever taking care of his daughter or spending time with her.
And now because of the court system, he knows that he can use her to inflict pain and torture. I took him to court with witnesses of his drinking and driving, his DUI police record, and the judge says he must love his daughter to put up $500 to hire an attorney. He moved in with another woman 60 miles away and the judge states that I have to go pick her up when he wants to visit her. My daughter goes crying and screaming every time. He is allowed to do with her as he sees fit. Leave her with anyone and go out drinking. Drink and abuse her. Tie her in the corner. He can do whatever he wants. Isn't that a grand thing.
What has happened to this world? All you men are liars, you don't care about the children, you care about your image to others. It's not about the kids, it's to get revenge on the mothers. God gave women the ability to give birth for a reason. No wonder the kids in this world are so messed up. God help us and the children. NO man loves a child the way it's mother can. You can say how much you love your children all you want but "it's not true". Your love is only half.

 

[Angry_Stepmom]

Lady, you have some nerve. There is a great big world out there, if you haven't noticed, that's full of loving and nurturing fathers that have to battle with deadbeat mothers and yes, there is such a thing. It's a sad thing that you personally have had to endure what you have with your husband but that doesn't justify your narrow-minded accusations. When you hear on the news of these mothers killing their children, does that mean that all mothers are evil and are likely to hurt their children? No, it doesn't and it goes both ways. You have no idea what fathers go through for their kids. You really need to think about what you're saying.

 

[ohiodad]

Your perceptions are narrow, biased, ill-informed, and based entirely on your one experience with an abuser. It is sad that you experienced this, but such a poorly reasoned argument would do little to sway a judge. Haley, before you go before a judge to petition for custody you will need to check that "all men are evil" attitude at the door.

What really bothers ME is that our court system still often agrees with her assertion that men can't love their child like their mother.

 

[carney]

If this man is tying your daughter up and drinking around her and abusing her, I would go to child protective services and see if they can help. They can talk to her and find out what is going on and ask that he have supervised visitations.
It is true there are a lot of men out there that treat their children like crap or don't pay attention to them at all. I use to be married to one. It was ordered that he isn't allowed to drink around the children. Of course he ended up with a DUI and the courts don't seem to care. He doesn't watch my children and my 8 year old is autistic and needs constant supervision. My 15 year old tells me that his father isn't watching them or paying much attention to them. His girlfriend does most of the work and she doesn't do enough either. The courts don't care about that. They only care when something bad happens, like the child ends up dead, then they act like why wasn't something done sooner.
All you can do is try to get all the evidence against him you can. Take your daughter to a therapist and tell the therapist you think the father is abusing and neglecting her. Therapists are allowed to testify in court and judges listen to them.
There are some men who take care of their children, like my new husband, but they are hard to find. Good luck.

 

[momindistress]

I'm an older mother. I married a man that left his two children ages 9 and 12 to move with me to another state. He hardly ever called them. They are now 25 and 21.
This man I married eventually turns into an alcoholic, although I hoped that one day he will come to his senses. After the birth of our daughter, he gets worse and worse. He becomes a falling down drunk on his time off, not ever taking care of his daughter or spending time with her.
And now because of the court system, he knows that he can use her to inflict pain and torture. I took him to court with witnesses of his drinking and driving, his DUI police record, and the judge says he must love his daughter to put up $500 to hire an attorney. He moved in with another woman 60 miles away and the judge states that I have to go pick her up when he wants to visit her. My daughter goes crying and screaming every time. He is allowed to do with her as he sees fit. Leave her with anyone and go out drinking. Drink and abuse her. Tie her in the corner. He can do whatever he wants. Isn't that a grand thing.
What has happened to this world? All you men are liars, you don't care about the children, you care about your image to others. It's not about the kids, it's to get revenge on the mothers. God gave women the ability to give birth for a reason. No wonder the kids in this world are so messed up. God help us and the children. NO man loves a child the way it's mother can. You can say how much you love your children all you want but "it's not true". Your love is only half.

ok this is my 2 cents all men are not like that in fact my husbend would do anything for his child even the one thats not his we are going through hell so he can adopt my son and get him away from his deadbeat dad .. and if he already left 2 kids behind ro start a new family that should of been a BIG warning sign as to what he is like. what were u thinking? did u really think he would change just for you? personaly i think you need counseling and help with your narrow mindedness!