Unmarried, custody questions

[Brite_Eyes]

I have a 2 week old baby girl. The father and I have been living together, but the relationship is kaput! I want to leave and move home to my family who will help me with care of the baby and myself. The father of the baby hasn't supported me or the baby. I was the one to get the insurance to cover the pregnancy. He hasn't put forth any effort to help financially in any way. Now that I want to leave him because we do nothing but fight, he tells me I will not get custody of the baby. (I am breastfeeding exclusively). He cusses at me and tells me he has a better job and that he will get custody. I am on maternity leave presently and do have a job to return to. My family will help me with financial concerns and babysitting. The father despises my mother so that is a bone of contension for him. I would allow visitation but limited as he drinks and drives and though he says he wouldn't if he had the baby, I can't be sure of that. His mother is very controlling and I fear they are planning to flee with my daughter as he keeps dropping little hints that my family and I are crazy.

 

[jacksgal]

Was paternity established? Does your family you plan to stay with live nearby? If he is established Father you both have equal rights to custody/vistation/support. You would be wise to seek an Attorneys advice

 

[Duranie]

If paternity has been established he does have some rights but it will be VERY hard for him to get custody. He will likely get some visitation if he takes you to court. If you want to move out of state you should talk to an attorney first. You may be required to eventually help out with transportation to visits.

 

[mothers2gether]

I don't know what the laws of your state are but in mine, since my situation is almost identical except our child has special needs and is 5 now, if he hasn't taken a paternity test, then he has no rights. My son's father SIGNED the birth certificate but the courts told me that until the test has been taken and proven, he has no rights. Contact your local legal aid office (try getting info from United Way by calling 211 or checking out their site).

I am NOT an attorney or anything but from personal experience, the very first thing you should do is contact an attorney. A lot of them will even give your first session free, or if you are low income, legal aid will provide you with one.

Also, the enviorment doesn't sound safe for either of you. You can always go stay with a friend or family member or a women's shelter while you get the advice. Don't be scared either. If paternity has been established, talk with legal aid. I doubt they would give him custody. And if nothing else, you need to stand firm. Don't let him cuss at you or be argue with you in front of the baby.