Summoned to court

soleslie

soleslie

New Member
Jurisdiction
New York
I am summoned to goto court for a order of protection. I will be away at school on my court date in a city 2,000+ miles away. I spoke with 3 different lawyers and all 3 are telling me different things. I want to know if my lawyer can attend my court date for the first hearing or should we try to reschedule it? I am still trying to decide which lawyer to go with. One said that he can go for me and the next said that I have to be in court and the other wants to reschedule the date instead. So any help?? First time in court so I'm abit confused.
 
Meganmiller said:
I am summoned to goto court for a order of protection. I will be away at school on my court date in a city 2,000+ miles away. I spoke with 3 different lawyers and all 3 are telling me different things. I want to know if my lawyer can attend my court date for the first hearing or should we try to reschedule it? I am still trying to decide which lawyer to go with. One said that he can go for me and the next said that I have to be in court and the other wants to reschedule the date instead. So any help?? First time in court so I'm abit confused.
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When in doubt show up to court.
 
The question is WHY were you summoned? To be served an Order of Protection or is it a hearing to determine if one will be issued?

You need to provide more details, including what was the situation that led to this.
 
Highwayman said:
The question is WHY were you summoned? To be served an Order of Protection or is it a hearing to determine if one will be issued?

You need to provide more details, including what was the situation that led to this.
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My ex got a temporary order of protection ex parte so they scheduled a date for both parties to be in court to give both sides. I got pregnant with his baby and he told me to abort it and I disagreed. Things got messy and he became cold and distant telling me to abort it. I called/texted him a lot from Friday-Sunday and I showed up to his house and went in his backyard so he gave me a last warning telling me that if I didn't abort the baby he would be done with me for good and never want to hear from me ever again. I didn't submit and told him no.

He deserves the OOP to be honest, I was trolling him/menacing at one point. I was also saying things like "I can't wait to see what our baby will look like!" .... "come with me to my prenatal appointment " .... basically saying things that a guy who doesn't want a child would be pissed to hear.

I'll be away at school the semester starts jan 9th and the court date is feb 2nd. I would have to take the first and the second away from school and at this point in time I can't do that. I honestly could careless about this guy he's just trying to ruin me because I want to keep the baby.
 
Meganmiller said:
My ex got a temporary order of protection ex parte so they scheduled a date for both parties to be in court to give both sides. I got pregnant with his baby and he told me to abort it and I disagreed. Things got messy and he became cold and distant telling me to abort it. I called/texted him a lot from Friday-Sunday and I showed up to his house and went in his backyard so he gave me a last warning telling me that if I didn't abort the baby he would be done with me for good and never want to hear from me ever again. I didn't submit and told him no.

He deserves the OOP to be honest, I was trolling him/menacing at one point. I was also saying things like "I can't wait to see what our baby will look like!" .... "come with me to my prenatal appointment " .... basically saying things that a guy who doesn't want a child would be pissed to hear.

I'll be away at school the semester starts jan 9th and the court date is feb 2nd. I would have to take the first and the second away from school and at this point in time I can't do that. I honestly could careless about this guy he's just trying to ruin me because I want to keep the baby.
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That's all you did to him and you think he deserves an OOP? If you don't care then don't show up. He gets the OOP - and you can't contact him ever again. But it doesn't look good to some employers if someone has an order of protection.

You should have just stayed away from him when he said he wanted you to abort. Why keep going over there? Sounds pretty juvenile to me actually.
 
leslie82 said:
That's all you did to him and you think he deserves an OOP? If you don't care then don't show up. He gets the OOP - and you can't contact him ever again. But it doesn't look good to some employers if someone has an order of protection.

You should have just stayed away from him when he said he wanted you to abort. Why keep going over there? Sounds pretty juvenile to me actually.
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I went into his backyard and text/called him a lot through out the day. I don't think that he deserves it and I would gladly leave him alone without one but to goto trial is a lot with me moving out of state. From the cost to the dragging out but I am worried about the OOP since I am in the dental hygiene program and idk what the state board will say. It just doesn't look good for me.
 
Meganmiller said:
I went into his backyard and text/called him a lot through out the day. I don't think that he deserves it and I would gladly leave him alone without one but to goto trial is a lot with me moving out of state. From the cost to the dragging out but I am worried about the OOP since I am in the dental hygiene program and idk what the state board will say. It just doesn't look good for me.
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Well if you were trespassing then I suppose he has grounds for one.

If you don't go to the court hearing he will get a default decision and he will get the protection order. So if you don't want an OOP on your record then it might behoove you to go to the court hearing and state why you should not have an OOP.
 
Highwayman said:
So you're not interested in him paying you child support? You plan on just staying away and paying for everything for the baby by yourself?
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There are people who do it all the time. Why not? Better than having toxicity around her and the child. I don't get shit from my ex husband. None of his kids are being supported by him. I should have just waived it like I first thought.

She should waive it too. Just because someone is ordered to pay support doesn't mean that they will do it.
 
There doesn't have to be any toxic environment because the boyfriend doesn't have to have anything to do with the child (and he doesn't seem to want to). Just pay child support. Why not make the loser pay up?

And yes, there is no guarantee he will pay but the courts deal with that. In New York he wouldn't be able to legally drive either, since DMV will suspend licenses/driving privilege for failing to pay child support.

I would give it a shot, but obviously that's up to the OP. I was just wondering what her thoughts were on that.
 
Highwayman said:
There doesn't have to be any toxic environment because the boyfriend doesn't have to have anything to do with the child (and he doesn't seem to want to). Just pay child support. Why not make the loser pay up?

And yes, there is no guarantee he will pay but the courts deal with that. In New York he wouldn't be able to legally drive either, since DMV will suspend licenses/driving privilege for failing to pay child support.

I would give it a shot, but obviously that's up to the OP. I was just wondering what her thoughts were on that.
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Because generally when they have to pay then they want visitation just to cause trouble. And no the courts don't deal with that unless you take them to court.

My ex husband lost his license several years ago after his fourth DUI. So they can't take his license. I think they took his tax return last year but I didn't get any of it. Probably went to the state for his oldest since that mom was on assistance when he was a baby.

He's in arrears thousands - and has only gone to jail for other criminal activity that he's done. So no the courts don't always go after people and they won't unless the custodial parent take it to the court.

Honestly I wish I had waived child support. I know I'll never get it nor half of daycare or medical. I didn't because I thought "well someday he has to pay it."
 
Highwayman said:
So you're not interested in him paying you child support? You plan on just staying away and paying for everything for the baby by yourself?
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He threaten to get full custody and drag me through court. I don't have the time or patience for this guy and his shenanigans.
 
Meganmiller said:
He threaten to get full custody and drag me through court. I don't have the time or patience for this guy and his shenanigans.
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well.... He could take you to court and get custody... since you will have a protect order against you. This could show your temper to a custody judge. I am laughing my butt off...... You don't have the time or the patience for this guy and his shenanigans. Yet... you failed as well in taking birth control. You go over to his house and continue to blast him to get under his skin. He was smart to take out a protective order against you.... Maybe he is thinking of his and your future lives. That being young with a child isn't a easy road. Your going to have to drop out of school until you can get the baby ready. I don't believe in killing a child..... but i do know that there are thousands of loving parents out there that would excel at giving this child a loving home. You should consider that.....
 
Meganmiller said:
He threaten to get full custody and drag me through court. I don't have the time or patience for this guy and his shenanigans.
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Then stay away from him. Why did you even bother going to his house and being a dick?

He will have a right to file for custody no matter if he's doing it to be a jerk or not. You chose to have sex with him and you chose him as the father. That's the bottomline.

Show up to court on the date of that hearing and tell the judge why there's no need for an order. Or don't show up, have an OOP against you and see how much it makes your life suck.
 
Disabled Vet said:
well.... He could take you to court and get custody... since you will have a protect order against you. This could show your temper to a custody judge. I am laughing my butt off...... You don't have the time or the patience for this guy and his shenanigans. Yet... you failed as well in taking birth control. You go over to his house and continue to blast him to get under his skin. He was smart to take out a protective order against you.... Maybe he is thinking of his and your future lives. That being young with a child isn't a easy road. Your going to have to drop out of school until you can get the baby ready. I don't believe in killing a child..... but i do know that there are thousands of loving parents out there that would excel at giving this child a loving home. You should consider that.....
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I was on the IUD while I got pregnant with his child. It is not a good thing to make assumptions. You don't know him or his temper or anything else in regards to my situation. There is no need for you to reply to a sensitive topic in a laughing matter. I'm in school and I can get through this on my own so thank you for your concerns and have a great 2017.
 

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