ArmyWife09
New Member
Let me give you some background to my questions, my ex husband and I had got divorced in 2008. I was awarded primary custody and everything was great. In the summer of 2009 I asked my ex if he would keep the kids for the summer because I was in paramedic school and the summer semester was 3 days a week and I was working 2 24 hour shifts a week too, trying to stay afloat and I would get the kids back starting in Aug, we had a pretty good relationship or so I thought. He said sure but wanted me to sign an agreement from his lawyer that would protect him, of course I said sure, signed it and it didn't dawn on me until I took him back to court for modification of custody that it didn't say anywhere I would get the kids back. Yes i was stupid to have trusted him and I know that now. Anyways I took him back to court but I didn't have the money for a lawyer and the judge ruled there was no substantial change to modify custody so he got to keep them. This is all out of Indiana by the way. So the years have passed and I have talked to the best lawyer around after that hearing and she said without substantial proof, nothing could be done. So I have lived my life, got my kids when I am supposed too and so forth and so on. Well about 3 weeks ago my world changed when my kids came for the weekend and my 8 year old son proceeds to tell my mother that their dad kicked my daughter (10 years old) in the side with his boot for throwing a temper tantrum and then shoved her face into a pillow and she was saying i can't breathe and he said good. Then proceeds to load her up into his car, bagged all her clothes into trash bags, and started driving her to my house, approx. 1 hour away. Of course I didn't know anything was going on. He gets her calmed down and then turns around. My daughter confirms this story to my mother in the car on the way home. My son said it was his worst birthday ever and he had told a friend at school what happened and the principal actually questioned my daughter about this bruise on her side but my daughter lied and said she hurt herself tumbling. This all happened almost a week before coming to my house. So i go to the ER and have it reported, DCS was contacted, and then went to my local police department and had a report filed. This was all over a weekend, DCS came to my house the next morning and interviewed me by myself and then my two children by themselves. He then pulled me back into the room and said he is very concerned for their safety and that is was going to try to make contact with my ex that same day. He had told me about some other abuse like pricking the kids fingers with needles that I didn't even know about! We tried to go about our day and of course DCS couldn't get in contact with my ex husband and it took them 4 additional days to finally get to talk to him and my DCS contact said he wasn't cooperating at the time. On that following Tuesday, I obtained a lawyer (Monday they were closed due to a lot of snow we had gotten), I still had possession of my children and was very direct with DCS and my lawyer that i wasn't giving them back until I was forced too because my daughter was scared to go back and he had threatened her if she told anyone. My ex signed a 5 day plan with DCS to let the children stay with me until he got things straightened out. So we went about our lives, driving them to school and normal routines. Of course on that Tuesday my lawyer had filed a expedited hearing. On Wednesday of that following week, DCS calls me and says the 5 day plan is up and that my ex can pick up the kids from school and that he had signed an informal adjustment to place high level DCS services in the home. I was furious to say the least because my daughter called me crying from school, terrified that she had to let dad pick her up. I even had the school calling me concerned.
So since then we had a court date set for this past Thursday but it got postponed because the judge had a conflict of interest with my ex husbands lawyers law firm. Still waiting on a new judge to pick up the case, and get a new hearing date.
So I want to know, what are my chances of getting custody of my kids back? I have followed all proper channels, just waiting on a hearing. I am a stable parent and always have been. I've been re-married for 6 years and we have one child together. My spouse is active duty Army with 12 years in, I have worked as a paramedic for a long time and getting ready to graduate from respiratory therapy school in May. I know my lawyer says I have a good chance but I wanted a second opinion because I worry myself sick about this whole situation because I feel like I am useless to my kids right now that don't want to be at their dads.
I wanted to add that my daughter has 10 cavities over the last several years because I will take them for their 6 month cleanings but he will not enforce brushing teeth, my daughter had her tonsils and adenoids out because she had strep throat 6 times, she had horrid temper tantrums at my ex's where she has punched holes in the walls, she only has them at my house on the Sunday she knows she has to go back to dads. (I never put two and two together I guess). My son has night terrors at his dads, never has had them at my house. I got accused of showing him horror movies at my house because he would always have night terrors at my ex's house. My ex has moved my kids from his mom's house, to girlfriend, then back to mom's, to new girlfriend, then back to moms again, to new girlfriend again, and then now back to moms house where he currently resides. He has moved my daughter 2 school districts and before all of this he was talking about moving them both again.
DCS has made an informal adjustment with him and a social worker is in their home 4-5 days a week for a total of 10 hours. My daughter has been allowed to call me and stays in touch frequently, saying she is scared and misses me more than ever.
I just want some clarity here, someone to tell me yes I have a good shot or no, I have no chance in heck! I will do whatever it takes to get my kids out of that environment because my ex is only playing by the rules now because he is being watched. Oh and DCS told me to make sure he was subpoena for the court case because he knew I was filing for modification of custody. Now the DCS guy has been great about communication, I just can't believe they didn't temporarily place them with me!
There is so much more that goes along with this story including a lot of neglect but I tried to include just the imperative information! If there is any other info needed, just ask!
So since then we had a court date set for this past Thursday but it got postponed because the judge had a conflict of interest with my ex husbands lawyers law firm. Still waiting on a new judge to pick up the case, and get a new hearing date.
So I want to know, what are my chances of getting custody of my kids back? I have followed all proper channels, just waiting on a hearing. I am a stable parent and always have been. I've been re-married for 6 years and we have one child together. My spouse is active duty Army with 12 years in, I have worked as a paramedic for a long time and getting ready to graduate from respiratory therapy school in May. I know my lawyer says I have a good chance but I wanted a second opinion because I worry myself sick about this whole situation because I feel like I am useless to my kids right now that don't want to be at their dads.
I wanted to add that my daughter has 10 cavities over the last several years because I will take them for their 6 month cleanings but he will not enforce brushing teeth, my daughter had her tonsils and adenoids out because she had strep throat 6 times, she had horrid temper tantrums at my ex's where she has punched holes in the walls, she only has them at my house on the Sunday she knows she has to go back to dads. (I never put two and two together I guess). My son has night terrors at his dads, never has had them at my house. I got accused of showing him horror movies at my house because he would always have night terrors at my ex's house. My ex has moved my kids from his mom's house, to girlfriend, then back to mom's, to new girlfriend, then back to moms again, to new girlfriend again, and then now back to moms house where he currently resides. He has moved my daughter 2 school districts and before all of this he was talking about moving them both again.
DCS has made an informal adjustment with him and a social worker is in their home 4-5 days a week for a total of 10 hours. My daughter has been allowed to call me and stays in touch frequently, saying she is scared and misses me more than ever.
I just want some clarity here, someone to tell me yes I have a good shot or no, I have no chance in heck! I will do whatever it takes to get my kids out of that environment because my ex is only playing by the rules now because he is being watched. Oh and DCS told me to make sure he was subpoena for the court case because he knew I was filing for modification of custody. Now the DCS guy has been great about communication, I just can't believe they didn't temporarily place them with me!
There is so much more that goes along with this story including a lot of neglect but I tried to include just the imperative information! If there is any other info needed, just ask!
