So Stressed out

[kimmicat78]

I have been investigated in reference to the type of relationship that me and my ex-boss had.
First of all my job is like being at high school, if anyone sees you talking to anyone else they automatically assume you are sleeping together. Rumors fly around all the time about who is doing who and what not. It's really is stupid!
Anyways to get to the point; at the time my boss was still my boss there were rumors going around that we were "sleeping" together. Which all stemmed from a previous employee who had a thing for our boss and basically asked him to have a sexual relationship with him; which he states he refused. Well this girl knew that me and my boss were friends and that we did conversate alot and she seemed to single me out for that simple reason.
So the investagation happened and I was called into HR and asked a serious of personal questions ranging from has he ever been inappropriate with me to are we sleeping with each other. All in all the investigation turned up that there was nothing going on; and that girl was CRAZY. :no:
But it has been an ongoing issue. Me and my ex-boss no longer talk unless we really have to in regards to work. He does still work with me but is no longer my "boss"; I am currently under a different manager.
I feel like I am being singled out because there are so many other rumors that fly around this place about other girls that have had "relationships" with him; but nothing is ever done to them.
I am so stressed out; I have trouble sleeping and eating.and I am losing weight. The stress has gotten so bad that my relationships at home are suffering. I feel like I am constantly being watched and I feel like my job is suffereing because of it.
I do not know what to do. I feel like I have been backed into a corner and there is no where for me to go. I really need this job because I am a single mother and this supports me and my daughter.
Is there any advice that I can get as to what actions I need to take in regards to this issue?

 

[muggsyj]

This is not legal Adice.

First of all take a deep breath and calm down, It is perfectly natural for an employer to ask you if your then boss had been making advance's towards you, at the end of the day they are only looking out for your interest. Sometimes women are harrased at work and stay silent because they value there Job and advances can sometimes get out of hand.

As for the feeling like you are back in school, I am afraid sometimes it dose feel like being back at school. We all spend a great deal of time at work and in some cases it becomes part of peoples lives. You are working with personality's and i am afraid we all dont see eye to eye all of the time. If your job is making you ill though, you should concider a change because you said you are a single parent and if this job gets you down too much how can you be in the right frame of mind around your daughter? remember she is looking up to you and it is her that needs you most.

Take care and good luck with what ever you decide to do.

Mark.

 

[crismld]

Your employer must have had a good reason for questioning your relationships within the workplace! HR professionals must be concerned about this issue. Relationships in the office can cause bad morale, work ethic can suffer, rumors begin to fly, and relationships that end badly can easily end up in a "Sexual harassment" lawsuit! I don't see any legal cause for action based on what you described. HR can legally question you about this issue. No one is stopping you from getting another job! No one can work under stress, seek other employment.