Signing over parental right in texas (unwed "parents")

[Unfortunate situation]

Jurisdiction

Texas

Please, no judgement or bashing in this thread! My fiancee and i have a 4 year old daughter. While we were broken up he had a 1 night stand with a girl. Shortly after we had gotten back together. Few months after, she had said she was pregnant and it could be my fiance's. He told her he wouldnt want to be in the childs life and sadly the child would not get the love he deserves, if it were in fact his (this was early in the pregnancy). She decided to keep it and after he was born was made to do a paternity test, of course it ended up being his. My question is, since they never had a relationship by any means (she was apparently still married!!!) can he sign over parental rights? This has nothing to do with trying to get out of paying child support. I just dont want a happy family to get broken up because of this. She had a choice, so does he not?

 

[mightymoose]

No, he can not simply sign away his responsibility to a child.
That said, the child is not his responsibility until a court says so. Since he had to do a paternity test I'll assume that has happened.
He should expect to be responsible for the child for the next 18 years unless someone else adopts it.

He did have a choice in the matter. That choice was made when he impregnated the mother.

 

[army judge]

My question is, since they never had a relationship by any means (she was apparently still married!!!) can he sign over parental rights?

Texas rarely allows a parent to sign away parental rights.

Children aren't chattel to be sold or bargained away.

However, until the woman takes some legal action, by law, the putative father of the child is the man to whom she is married.

These days, once DNA reveals the biological father, many putative father's often go to court to get out from under the burden of child support.

If that occurs in this case, the biological father will be on the hook for child support.

I suggest you advise your friend to discuss the matter with a couple of Texas licensed lawyers.

 

[zddoodah]

can he sign over parental rights?

No. There's no such thing as simply "sign[ing] over parental rights." If some other man steps up and wants to adopt the child, your fiance can sign off on the adoption. Otherwise, he chose to father a child. Therefore, assuming his paternity is properly established, if the mother seeks child support, he'll be obligated to pay.

I just dont want a happy family to get broken up because of this.

What family are you talking about, and why would it "get broken up"? You told us that the mother "was apparently still married," and I assume you're saying that she was married at the time she and your fiance had sex. Are you using the word "was" to imply that she no longer is married? If she's no longer married, then there's no concern about that family being "broken up." If they are still married, I would think the DNA test results would be enough to break up the marriage, but maybe she hasn't shared those results with her husband.

She had a choice, so does he not?

He most certainly had choices. He had a choice to have vaginal sex. He had a choice to use or not use some form of birth control. He made the choice to have vaginal sex and either not use birth control or use birth control and accept the fact that no form of birth control (other than abstinence) is perfect. Once he made those choices, he had no choice about whether or not his sexual partner became pregnant (depending on your belief system, that choice was made by (a) god or random biological chance). Once she became pregnant, the law provides that the decision to terminate or not terminate the pregnancy belongs entirely to the mother. This is a matter of law that is well known to the general population.

Since you said that payment of child support is not your concern (although it should be since, once you marry him, you will also marry his problems), then there really isn't any issue. Although he can be forced to pay child support, the law will not force him to be a part of his child's life.

Of course, if the woman is still married, she can deceive her husband about the child's paternity and pretend until the child reaches the age of majority. That's up to her.

 

[InsideSpark]

I thought Texas still had a statute that stated any child born to a married [woman] was to be assumed a product of the marriage? I know when I had a child in Texas with my then married partner (to me) that they, the other parent still had to sign an affidavit although it may have been because they (other parent) were military?

I would think that under most state statutes if she's legally married to another man the child would be presumed to be the husbands and a product of marriage and if he denied paternity then she could pursue other avenues then allow others, or force them, to come forward for a paternity test and subsequent privileges and consequences including visitation and child support.

Now if your "fiancee" wants nothing to do with the child then no court can force him to have a relationship with his child BUT i would think that you and he, being the reasonable people you are, would want him to have a relationship with his child. It doesn't matter if he knew her for years or hours, he made the choice to have sex with her which resulted in an impregnation than he has a child and the child is the innocent party in the situation.

I understand YOU, OP, are trying to remain civil and above reproach however this has nothing to do with you im afraid, this is not your child, your choice, nor are you given any option at all on the situation So while you can encourage and sup[port advice and avenues you have zero legal standing at all.

 

[leslie82]

Please, no judgement or bashing in this thread! My fiancee and i have a 4 year old daughter. While we were broken up he had a 1 night stand with a girl. Shortly after we had gotten back together. Few months after, she had said she was pregnant and it could be my fiance's. He told her he wouldnt want to be in the childs life and sadly the child would not get the love he deserves, if it were in fact his (this was early in the pregnancy). She decided to keep it and after he was born was made to do a paternity test, of course it ended up being his. My question is, since they never had a relationship by any means (she was apparently still married!!!) can he sign over parental rights? This has nothing to do with trying to get out of paying child support. I just dont want a happy family to get broken up because of this. She had a choice, so does he not?

If she was married when that child was born her husband is the legal father unless he takes that paternity test and goes to court and contests it.

Who "made" him do a paternity test? Are you sure she was married or was she not at the time of birth?

If he ends up being the father legally he doesn't have to be in the child's life. There are plenty of deadbeat dads (and moms) out there in the world who aren't in their kids lives. So I would say if he gets on the hook for child support fine - let the mom have custody. But he's gonna pay child support whether he wants to or not. If he already doesn't want to be in the kid's life then I don't think he ever should be. He'll just hurt the kid worse being in his life and being a half ass dad than not being there at all.

You want to be with him fine but remember - once a cheater always a cheater.