I would suggest a caveat ... if the order does not allow for any provision to permit you to pick up your sole property, then I wouldn't show up even with a police standby as that may simply result in your arrest.
If you were not married and this is not arguably community property, and you are the legal and registered owner of the vehicle (and her name is NOWHERE on the paperwork) then you should be able to simply give a friend the key and have him pick it up. You might want to notify the police, too, as she will probably report it stolen.
If the friend shows up with the police to standby, keep in mind that the police will not decide who owns the car, they are only there to keep the peace. If there is a dispute over ownership, then the friend may leave empty-handed.