Non-custodial parent refusing to work?

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aniseblue

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Non-custodial parent moved 5 hours away, sees child on school holidays only (went as long as five months with no visits).

Non-custodial parent started a small business that is not doing well, claims to have "no money" to provide support. Not willing to take another job, now applying for food stamps and welfare to support themselves, rather than seek other employment.

This is an able-bodied person, relatively young, looks well-put together, has college degree. Could get hired at a job that would make at least minimal support payments possible.

Any recourse under New York State law? Thanks.
 
Non-custodial parent moved 5 hours away, sees child on school holidays only (went as long as five months with no visits).

Non-custodial parent started a small business that is not doing well, claims to have "no money" to provide support. Not willing to take another job, now applying for food stamps and welfare to support themselves, rather than seek other employment.

This is an able-bodied person, relatively young, looks well-put together, has college degree. Could get hired at a job that would make at least minimal support payments possible.

Any recourse under New York State law? Thanks.

If he owes court ordered support, the meter keeps running, and the support will still be owed.

There's nothing the courts can do to make him work.
That means you must live your life, continue to care for your child(ren) without any expectation he'll pay what the court says he must.

If he is granted welfare, that money is exempt from being levied against to pay back child support.

If he continues to defy the courts, he could end up in jail. If he is jailed, he'll eventually get out. He'll stay there longer if you don't cut a deal with him to get a few scraps of the thousands of dollars he owes you.

Unfortunately you made a child with a deadbeat. Thank God he's out of your life, and pray he stays out of your life. If he visits the kid(s), be civil for the sake if the children. If he doesn't visit regularly, don't bad mouth him to the kids, say something like, "Your father visits you when he can. He loves you." Then change the subject.

It's hard, but for the sake of your child(ren) let it go, don't expect anything from the deadbeat, let the courts do what they do, but don't let the kids hear anything negative.
 
FYI to all the deadbeat is the mother. Doesn't seem to matter legally, but it's the Dad in this case who has assumed all child care and financial responsibilities.

There is currently no child support order. Previous arrangement as detailed in divorce agreement was 50-50 time spent while both parents lived in the same town. Non-custodial parent moved away in violation of the agreement. Trying to figure out if/how going to court can be useful given the willful lack of income.

Thanks for all input.
 
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FYI to all the deadbeat is the mother. Doesn't seem to matter legally, but it's the Dad in this case who has assumed all child care and financial responsibilities. Thanks for all input.

Deadbeats have no gender, race, or sexual persuasion. A deadbeat is just a deadbeat.

Man, woman, or other: the solutions remain the same.
 
There is currently no child support order.

Then there is no recourse under NY law or any law until there IS a child support order.
Previous arrangement as detailed in divorce agreement was 50-50 time spent while both parents lived in the same town. Non-custodial parent moved away in violation of the agreement.

That's not much of a violation. At least nothing for which a penalty can be exacted, other than the NCP paying for her own visitation arrangements.

Trying to figure out if/how going to court can be useful given the willful lack of income.

Income can be imputed if you seek child support. Contempt can be cited if she fails to pay.

It's up to you if you want to pursue.

Seems to me, though, if she's not seeking custody and child support maybe you'd be wise to let sleeping dogs lie and be thankful that she's not making your life miserable.
 
Everyone maintains a congenial relationship. Participating fully in ensuring that what visits can happen do happen, etc. All these efforts are so the child won't have to go without. Obviously a child that went from being supported by two parents suddenly down to one parent is already going without.

There was no child support order because of the 50-50 sharing. (Equal time in each household, relatively equal incomes.) In the divorce was a stipulation that neither parent would move more than 50 miles. Interesting that this can be violated and the courts are fine with it... Why bother having something like that in an agreement at all?

Thank you all sincerely for all info. Seems like child is screwed.
 
Everyone maintains a congenial relationship. Participating fully in ensuring that what visits can happen do happen, etc. All these efforts are so the child won't have to go without. Obviously a child that went from being supported by two parents suddenly down to one parent is already going without.

There was no child support order because of the 50-50 sharing. (Equal time in each household, relatively equal incomes.) In the divorce was a stipulation that neither parent would move more than 50 miles. Interesting that this can be violated and the courts are fine with it... Why bother having something like that in an agreement at all?

Thank you all sincerely for all info. Seems like child is screwed.

No parent, male or female, is allowed to violate a court order.
The divorce, your divorce, didn't seek to litigate the issue(s) you're allegedly discussing.

What's your LEGAL recourse today?

You must take the matter(s) at issue back to court, in order for the court to rule on them.

That requires YOU to request child support, visitation, and custody to be decided anew. Many divorces do nothing to address child custody and support matters. Yours is an example of that.

You and your child would be best served if you discussed your legal options, deliberated on those options, then decided which options are worth pursuing.

I can assure you insofar as divorced parents are concerned, the child is best served when one parent is a sole managing conservator (that's what we call it in Texas), and the other has visitation rights, pays child support, and is in the child's life.



Sole managing conservatorship (SMC) means you are the only parent with the legal right to make certain decisions concerning your child. If you are granted SMC, you have the general rights given to a conservator and you are the only parent who has rights such as:
decide the primary (main) residence of the child;
consent to medical, dental, and surgical treatment involving invasive procedures;
consent to psychiatric and psychological treatment;
receive child support; and
make decisions concerning the child's education.

There are several reasons why a judge might grant one parent sole managing conservatorship:
The other parent has a history of family violence, neglect.
The other parent has a history of drugs, alcohol or other criminal activity.
The other parent has been absent from the child's life.
There is a history of extreme conflict between the parents over educational, medical and religious values.

You need to understand the legal options that best serve your child in NY state. I've described Texas, which is similar to NY, but there are unique differences. Talk to a lawyer, three or four lawyers, think about what you've learned, then decide. The initial consultation is normally provided at no charge. The Internet is not going to provide you with enough depth of information to choose what's best for your child.

Good luck.
 
Interesting that this can be violated and the courts are fine with it..

Nobody said that the courts are fine with it. It's just that nobody's going to drop a house on her.

Her moving away is a "substantial change in circumstances" for which you can go to court and seek an adjustment of your agreement to address the issues of custody, child support, and imputing income.
 
OK, thanks. Situation is currently stable (if inexcusable), so looking to do the research on what is even possible...what principles exist in the law...before starting a conflict. Current lawyer's advice (from the divorce) was to lay low, force non-custodial parent to take the matter to court over custody/money and deal with it then, and if they don't, just be happy to have the child and make it all work somehow. Sadly money doesn't grow on trees, that's easier said than done. But working on it. Appreciate all recommendations, including to check with multiple attorneys, thank you.
 
Current lawyer's advice (from the divorce) was to lay low, force non-custodial parent to take the matter to court over custody/money and deal with it then, and if they don't, just be happy to have the child and make it all work somehow.

Kind of what I wrote.
 
If the parent was not paying support before, why does a lack of income now make a difference? Did you file for contempt of the order when the other parent wanted to move 5 hours away? It sounds like that answer is no, and no modification was sought based on the move either. If you can not work it out between you, then the court will decide. You may not like what the court decides. You just aren't going to get blood from a turnip. If the other parent is trying to make a small business work, the court is not going to force her to abandon the business and seek a better paying job.
 
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