Hello All.
My husband and I are planning on filing for custody of my 5 year old stepson. Since his birth his primary residence as been at his mothers. However he has spent an equal amount of time with my husband, sometimes more, each year since his birth. They were never married, and never lived together. His mother has bounced around from house to house and relationship to relationship faster than you are able to obtain her address or her boyfriends name. She is still young and has not matured the way you would expect her to after having a child. We have evidence of her smoking pot in the childs presence, and letting her friends do so as well. She is constantly posting vivid adult photos of herself and her boyfriend on the internet in social networking sites, and for the past 2 years has been working as a stripper off and on in completely nude and raunchy stripclubs. Presently through the courts there is no visitation set in paperwork, just child support.
With no notice at all, she moved over 800 miles and at least 4 states away from us. (We were on our way to pick him up when we found out.) We found out she violated a state law by doing so without giving us a 30 day notice to object to her move out of state. About 4 months ago, she moved back into the state about 4.5 hours away from us. I took him to the doctor to update his shots - which she advised me that she was unsure if his shots were current because she "could not find a doctor". His doctor for when he is with us advised us he was 2 years behind on his shots. We got them updated right then and there. When attempting to enroll him into school she was "unsure how to fill out the paperwork" and called me for assistance. I walked her through this... only to find out at the same time that they were moving YET again. Closer... but still another move. He missed 2 weeks of the school year - his FIRST year in school. She is constantly telling my husband that he is doing good in school - yet when she sends his school work to us so that we can see it... he has "Ns and Incomplete's" on more than half of the work. He recently got his report card, and his grades were horrible. This is one of our concerns because when he is with us.. he approaches learning with such enthusiasm and want. He does excellent on everything we work with him on. We have called the teacher to schedule a conference with her to find out what is going on since we seem to get no straight answers from the mother. She is presently unemployed living off of state assistance by choice. She does not look for employment. Every time my stepson comes to our house he is bit up by something. When she is questioned we are told "bed bugs" that were taken care of... fleas that they are "dealing with"... and this is constantly. I also have 2 boys so I know that they are always going to "get into things" or get hurt because they are soo adventurous... but there comes a limit. If its something you can prevent.. in my opinion you should take all actions to do so.
Although she has the potential to be a good mother to him.. we have not seen her do so in over 5 years. My stepson is always telling us he wants to live with us and go to school at his brothers school (my son).
My question for you is... what do you think my husbands chances are of obtaining Primary Physical Custody of my stepson when we are constantly dealing with these situations? What kinds of things do you think we need to take with us when we go to court to prove our case?
My husband and I are planning on filing for custody of my 5 year old stepson. Since his birth his primary residence as been at his mothers. However he has spent an equal amount of time with my husband, sometimes more, each year since his birth. They were never married, and never lived together. His mother has bounced around from house to house and relationship to relationship faster than you are able to obtain her address or her boyfriends name. She is still young and has not matured the way you would expect her to after having a child. We have evidence of her smoking pot in the childs presence, and letting her friends do so as well. She is constantly posting vivid adult photos of herself and her boyfriend on the internet in social networking sites, and for the past 2 years has been working as a stripper off and on in completely nude and raunchy stripclubs. Presently through the courts there is no visitation set in paperwork, just child support.
With no notice at all, she moved over 800 miles and at least 4 states away from us. (We were on our way to pick him up when we found out.) We found out she violated a state law by doing so without giving us a 30 day notice to object to her move out of state. About 4 months ago, she moved back into the state about 4.5 hours away from us. I took him to the doctor to update his shots - which she advised me that she was unsure if his shots were current because she "could not find a doctor". His doctor for when he is with us advised us he was 2 years behind on his shots. We got them updated right then and there. When attempting to enroll him into school she was "unsure how to fill out the paperwork" and called me for assistance. I walked her through this... only to find out at the same time that they were moving YET again. Closer... but still another move. He missed 2 weeks of the school year - his FIRST year in school. She is constantly telling my husband that he is doing good in school - yet when she sends his school work to us so that we can see it... he has "Ns and Incomplete's" on more than half of the work. He recently got his report card, and his grades were horrible. This is one of our concerns because when he is with us.. he approaches learning with such enthusiasm and want. He does excellent on everything we work with him on. We have called the teacher to schedule a conference with her to find out what is going on since we seem to get no straight answers from the mother. She is presently unemployed living off of state assistance by choice. She does not look for employment. Every time my stepson comes to our house he is bit up by something. When she is questioned we are told "bed bugs" that were taken care of... fleas that they are "dealing with"... and this is constantly. I also have 2 boys so I know that they are always going to "get into things" or get hurt because they are soo adventurous... but there comes a limit. If its something you can prevent.. in my opinion you should take all actions to do so.
Although she has the potential to be a good mother to him.. we have not seen her do so in over 5 years. My stepson is always telling us he wants to live with us and go to school at his brothers school (my son).
My question for you is... what do you think my husbands chances are of obtaining Primary Physical Custody of my stepson when we are constantly dealing with these situations? What kinds of things do you think we need to take with us when we go to court to prove our case?
