My 14 year old is being stalked by a boy at school

[imamomx4]

My daughter is being harrassed by a boy at school,she has tried to tell him that she doesn't like him like that and to please stop calling her.Now 1 month later,he calls her relentlessly wanting to know why she doesn't like him,why she won't go out with him.If she hangs up or rejects his call,he calls right back and starts yelling at her that she is a whore and much worse. My daughter is a good girl,honor roll student and she has never dated this boy. He just can't take no for an answer. He has even called her and said he can see her and what she is doing. When she asked what it was, HE WAS RIGHT!! What can I do to protect my daughter? Can I get a no contact order when they go to the same school?

 

[jharris352]

There must not be a Dad in the picture, no offense to Mom, but everyone has their roles and little boys who can't take no for an answer is usually a Dad's job.

So Mom, here is what I would do:

1. I would be the one answering the phone. I would explain to this little boy that his contact with my daughter is over.
2. I would contact his parents. By doing so I would give them the opportunity to handle their child without the school or authorities being involved. I would try to be friendly, parent to parent, telling them that your daughter is just not interested and that he is beginning to scare you and her. Tell them you would rather not get the school or other authorities involved for HIS sake and that you hope to just work together as parents.

If that doesn't work or the parents have a less that "Thank you for not putting my son in jail" attitude, then:

3. Contact the Principal and make a WRITTEN complaint. The school should be ALL OVER this.

If he so much as looks in your daughter's direction after that:

4. Call the police, do a police report. As a parent you can designate that he can have no contact with your minor daughter. (it's easier than a restraining order and just as good). They will go to his house and tell him personally that ANY CONTACT with your daughter or attempted contact with your daughter will put him in jail. That order will expire when you resend it or she becomes 18.

5. I doubt anything else will be necessary.

Good luck. Treat this very seriously. The boy may not mean any harm but he is 14-16, full of hormones and he is potentially dangerous.

 

[BayState]

My daughter is being harrassed by a boy at school,she has tried to tell him that she doesn't like him like that and to please stop calling her.Now 1 month later,he calls her relentlessly wanting to know why she doesn't like him,why she won't go out with him.If she hangs up or rejects his call,he calls right back and starts yelling at her that she is a whore and much worse. My daughter is a good girl,honor roll student and she has never dated this boy. He just can't take no for an answer. He has even called her and said he can see her and what she is doing. When she asked what it was, HE WAS RIGHT!! What can I do to protect my daughter? Can I get a no contact order when they go to the same school?

What happened when you called the boys parents and told then of this harassment? What did the school do when you contacted them???

 

[CdwJava]

4. Call the police, do a police report. As a parent you can designate that he can have no contact with your minor daughter. (it's easier than a restraining order and just as good). They will go to his house and tell him personally that ANY CONTACT with your daughter or attempted contact with your daughter will put him in jail. That order will expire when you resend it or she becomes 18.

Are you sure about that? Is this something unique to the OP's state of Iowa? Or your state (if you are not in Iowa)? I have never heard of such a thing. If only it were that simple out here!

Here, it would be a case of annoying and harassing calls (a misdemeanor), possibly stalking, and the possibility of a restraining order. Unfortunately, not all states have civil harassment orders or the equivalent.

- Carl

 

[jharris352]

Carl, a parent has absolute control over who may have contact with a minor. Here in Georgia they issue what I think they call a Trespass Warrant. Although now that I think about it you are right, it wouldn't work because both parties are minors.

Ok, let me back up. Carl is right. If you get to number 4 you are going to have to get a No contact order from a judge. I was thinking about a case where the boy chasing the underage girl was over 18. In that case you have contact by an adult with a minor and that is handled much differently.

Thanks Carl.

 

[CdwJava]

I tend to hesitate to say something cannot be as I have learned over the years that what might hold true in my state, or even in MOST states, is not always the case nationwide. So, I thought that maybe there was a state where all it takes is a verbal notice by an officer. That would be nice, and easy ... even if kinda scary from a civil liberties standpoint.

Out here, the verbal notice - even to an adult - would not be legally sufficient to make a criminal allegation with future contacts. We do not have a crime similar to "custodial interference" here. Unless the adult were encouraging the child to disobey the parents or break the law in some way, or the contact was lewd in some manner, it would not be a crime by itself. Many is the time I wish that it would be!

 

[jharris352]

In rural Georgia and North Carolina where I'm from, Dad just employs a shotgun and the will to use it. The police generally let that fall under, "You better listen to that man!"