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marriage doesn't happen but money spent on house

Discussion in 'Other Ownership, Use & Privacy Issues' started by bigdan, Sep 5, 2020.

  1. bigdan

    bigdan Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I met a woman in church and asked her to marry me. She said yes. I am building a house and I was going to put shingles on the roof. She works for a roofing company and offered to pay for a standing seam metal roof. She has since become distant, cold and silent yet continues to pay for the roof assuming this marriage is still going to happen. I will not marry a woman who obviously doesn't love me. If the marriage does not happen, am I legally bound to pay her back for the roof? There was no legal contract involved and I did not even ask for her to do that.
     
  2. Tax Counsel

    Tax Counsel Well-Known Member

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    You might be. Understand that marriage itself is a contract, and viewed in that light your engagement is a promise to enter into that contract. She's providing the roof in contemplation of that marriage and if you are the one to break the engagement, she may well have a claim to reimbursement for the value of the roof. This is one reason why you want to be careful to what you agree to after getting engaged.

    And considering that your home will be improved with the new roof, it does not strike me as unfair that should you pay for it if you break the engagement. You are, after all, getting value from it.
     
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  3. welkin

    welkin Active Member

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    I don't see any connection between a marriage contract and her gift to you of the roof.
     
  4. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    bigdan: Tax Counsel is an attorney, while welkin is...not.
     
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  5. bigdan

    bigdan Law Topic Starter New Member

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    She is the one getting cold feet. She said "we're not married yet, we're just dating". Seams to me that "dating" is a step back from engagement. Last words from her were, " I just want to be left alone" That was July 31st and she hasn't called since. What do you think?
     
  6. justblue

    justblue Well-Known Member

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    Did you and she have an argument or something? Did she suffer a loss of some kind? Have you tried calling her and asking what is wrong and how you both can fix it?
     
  7. bigdan

    bigdan Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I wish I knew what happened. If the last thing she said to me was "I just want to be left alone", then I would think the next call should be from her. Otherwise I would not be leaving her alone. I would want nothing better than to know she loves me and become her husband. I am 63 years old and I really want to experience what God meant marriage to be in the last few years of my life. If you are born again, please pray for us...
     
  8. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    I'd adhere to the Proverb: "Let sleeping dogs lie".

    Let sleeping dogs lie means: "leave well enough alone, don't stir up trouble, don't interfere in a dead situation and risk making trouble."
     
  9. welkin

    welkin Active Member

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    Neither is Zigner, adjusterjack or justblue. So I guess we can just ignore your future opinions.

    A totally unnecessary post and inflammatory. Enough said.
     
  10. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    I don't claim to be, but this OP received conflicting advice. I was advising the OP that the advice received was given by an attorney and a non-attorney. That's an important distinction for the OP when deciding which is more likely correct.
     
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  11. welkin

    welkin Active Member

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    OK, fair enough. But if you read TC's post he makes one big assumption that
    She's providing the roof in contemplation of that marriage and if you are the one to break the engagement, she may well have a claim to reimbursement for the value of the roof.

    First, TC doesn't know if the gift of the standing seem roof was in contemplation of marriage. OP was going to install a shingle roof when his girl friend (who worked for a roofing company) offered to pay for the metal roof without any agreement or conditions. That to me is a gift like any other gift and has nothing to do with contemplation of marriage.

    Second, there is no indication that the house OP is building is a marital home. He may be building a speck house, he may already have the marital home, he may be moving into her home.

    But it appears that all this moot since OP is not the one breaking the marital contract if that is even a cause of action in Arizona anymore.
     
  12. zddoodah

    zddoodah Well-Known Member

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    Nothing in your post suggests you would have such liability. However, the lack of any written agreements makes pretty much everything a crap shoot.
     

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