Leaving the state

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luvstexas

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I'm hoping someone can shed light on this issue:
I was offered a great spot at a university in another state this fall, scholarship and housing. I only have two semesters to complete. I have full legal custody of my son and his mother has visitation. My order says I can take him anywhere but I do of course have to notify the court and his mother.

I've tried to talk to her about letting me take him until next summer. I've found a great school on the university for him (better than the one he has here) and overall it would a great temporary change for him. I've offered her in exchange the entire summer and the month of December so that she doesn't lose any of her time. She is not hearing any of it. She's refuses to work with me.

Fine. I can accept that. Its her right regardless of her real reasons for refusing to work with me.

However, I'm wondering if I can leave my son with my wife in the home he's lived most of his life. Will this be acceptable or does she have grounds to go to court for custody? I'm not leaving indefinitely, I am coming back and his mother would continue her visitation as normal. My entire family is here in town also. Would this be acceptable or should I scrap the idea of going to school over there altogether because I could lose my child?
I have full legal custody of him, could I grant temp guardianship to my wife while I'm gone? I realize she's a legal stranger but she's raised him most of his life and our home is his my son's home. We follow the standard visitation schedule for the state of TX. Thank you!
 
Mom has rights for custody. Your wife does not. It makes no sense for you to leave the state and leave the child with your wife, over the mother. So yes mom has grounds for custody. If you cannot get mom to agree to let you take the child then you have to go to coourt and battle it out or give custody to her.
 
I would have son would stay with wife because mom frequently skips out on visitation and is overall undependable. I have over two years' worth of documentation to prove this. Not petty stuff at all. Real proof she's not full time parent material. Before I got full custody, there'd be times when I had to leave work in the middle of the day to pick up my child because the daycare had not been paid and center was refusing to take him. I had to scramble to find new childcare for him. This past weekend, she returned him an hour late with no shoes or shirt...(what the h--?) Hence, I have full legal custody. She has visitation.
Her fighting me on this has little do with our son but that fact that I won't be around anymore for her to harrass and attempt to get back with. (Multiple emails and texts to prove this as well.) I'd have no problem leaving him with her if she was a good parent. Of course, I know legally, those standards in our courts are very low...

I'm speaking with my attorney later about going to court over this. Just wanted to get a perspective. Thanks Duranie!
 
I have no doubt in my mind that my son's mother is not capable of providing full time care. This opportunity for me to attend school for 9 months will definitely have it's long term benefits for me and my ability to provide for my child and the opportunities I can afford him. If I were allowed to take him, we would ALL move as a family and if I had to leave him, I would leave the state alone.
I am willing to live with the fact that I will not be able to have him with me while I'm there. I'm just wondering that if I was already awarded full legal custody, if I have documented proof that leaving him with his mother is NOT in my son's best interests, might I be able to leave him with my wife and continue normal visitation as we are doing now? I'm not trying to take him away from her at all...if we worked out summers, technically she'd have the same amount of visitation as she takes per year-- just weeks at a time instead of hours per week.

Will a judge consider that or is it automatic that mom would get the favorable nod simply because she is the mother?
 
You don't want to leave your son with your ex for 9 months...but you're willing to give and have offered her 3 months in the summer and 1 month in December for a total of 4 months? So she can be a good parent for 4 months and you trust her with his care for those 4 months, but not 9? I'm confused. I think if you take this to court, a judge might wonder the same thing. Just my two cents.
 
You do not get to decide though what happnes to the child, the court does. Mom has a GREAT case for custody over your wife, like it or not. You'll have to go to court over it.
 
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