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Knowing the truth

Discussion in 'Guardians & Conservators' started by Casey King, Sep 23, 2021.

  1. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Jurisdiction:
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    Hello. I’m 35 years old and as a result of me being born prematurely, I have brain damage, a learning disability, and mild cerebral palsy. I’m not retarded, don’t have autism, and I’m not in a wheelchair or need crutches to walk. I still live at home with my parents. Honestly, people don’t even know I’m disabled unless I told them. About 10 years ago, (I was 25) my mom was told she could apply to get me social security disability. Long story short, we went to a probate court in Gainesville to try and see if I was eligible. Well, I won my case! But, what I was never told was apparently, my mom also tried to get guardianship over me. Now 10 years later, I still haven’t seen any guardianship papers. I’ve asked to see them a few times, but my mom said I don’t have any right to, I just need to take her word for it. Unacceptable! I want proof for myself. I’ve called the probate court twice and I was told both times that there is no guardianship! Because I’m disabled, my parents are overprotective of me and I feel like I’m a prisoner in my home. My mom has also been emotionally, verbally , and mentally abusive almost my entire life. I don’t know what to do in my situation anymore. I’m not allowed to drive or live on my own. I’m also not allowed to do my own laundry, cook or even date the man I want to. I understand I do have some limitations, but I’m tired of being held back from really being an adult and having a life. Can I leave home? Any advice and/or thoughts would be very helpful! What are my rights?
     
  2. PayrollHRGuy

    PayrollHRGuy Well-Known Member

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    You certainly can and the only way your mother could stop you is to use the guardianship she may or may not have.
     
  3. zddoodah

    zddoodah Well-Known Member

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    "Tried to get" or actually got?

    Take her word that she tried?

    Then what is it that you want proof of?

    Who or what is stopping you from doing either of those things? If you want to learn to drive, take an online class and/or contact a local company that offers driver's ed and behind the wheel training. If you want to live on your own, go find a place to live that you can afford and pack up your stuff.

    If you live with your parents, they're free to refuse to allow you to use their washer/dryer and kitchen appliances. As far as dating, my response above about driving and living on your own applies.

    No one here has any reason to believe you lack this ability (or that there's any legal impediment to you doing so). Of course, your ability to leave home and live on your own obviously depends on your ability to support yourself financially, and you've told us nothing at all about that.

    Creating a list of rights would serve no useful purpose, but you've given us no reason to believe you don't have all the same legal rights as any other adult.
     
  4. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    She said she has a guardianship over me. She wants me to take her word that she has one. I want proof that there is paperwork signed by the judge! My parents have always told me that I cannot drive or live on my own. I actually know how to drive....I’ve done drivers ed and had a few people let me drive, but I need more practice. I have heard that people can live on their social security. I have had two cleaning jobs in the past and a landscaping job. I enjoy writing, and I’d rather write then clean for a job. I have money in the bank, but I can’t use any of it until my parents die. Unfortunately, they didn’t really train or prepare me to know how to live on my own or to be a real adult. They say I’m too naive and I’m too mentally disabled. I’m not capable enough to do anything. Apparently, all I’m good for is cleaning around the house and doing things for my parents, like I’m their slave! I’d love to try to learn what I can since they’re not teaching me anything and then move out to go live with a friend. Honestly, I know I can’t afford an apartment nor would I want to live alone.
     
  5. adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

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    That's easy. Go to the courthouse and look up your name and her name. If there is a case file get copies for your own records. It should be clear enough whether guardianship was awarded or not.
     
  6. zddoodah

    zddoodah Well-Known Member

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    I can't quite tell what you're looking to achieve, but it seems like the only legal issue being raised is whether or not a guardianship exists - and even at that, until and unless you seek to move out on your own, it's more of an academic issue than anything else.

    If your mother won't back up her assertion, then the court is the only place to confirm or refute what she claims.
     
  7. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Are either of you lawyers, attorneys, or judges? Just curious. So just calling the probate court isn’t good enough or her showing me paperwork?
     
  8. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    It's not likely that a phone call will get you the information you are looking for, and if you don't trust your mom now, why would you trust any paperwork she presents to you ?
     
  9. zddoodah

    zddoodah Well-Known Member

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    I'm a lawyer/attorney (the words are synonymous). No one else who has responded in this thread is, but everything that everyone has written in this thread is legally accurate. However, (1) to the best of my knowledge, no one who posts here regularly is in Georgia, and (2) we're all anonymous strangers to each other.

    This question is grammatically ambiguous. You told us that your mother is refusing to show you any paperwork, so I'm not sure what everything from the word "so" to the end is supposed to mean. As far as calling the clerk, you told us that you "called the probate court twice and [were] told both times that there is no guardianship." Is that "good enough"? I don't know. Good enough for what? It's hard to prove a negative, but for starters, are you sure you called the right clerk? Also, the clerk telling you "there is no guardianship" doesn't foreclose the possibility that your mother might have sought one. Nor does it foreclose the possibility that he clerk gave you bad information. If you visit the court clerk's office, you can verify all this yourself.

    Only you can decide what is and isn't "good enough" for you.
     
  10. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    My mom will never agree to do that, and I’d have to find someone to take me (it’s about 2 hours away).
     
  11. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    I’m sorry for the errors. Yes, I made sure to call the right person and asked more than once if what she was telling me is correct!

    Also, how and when will I ever be able to move out if there really is a guardianship? Seems like I’ll never be free from the abuse!
     
    Last edited: Sep 24, 2021
  12. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    I find it interesting that the court clerk took the time to look up your case and advise you on any actions that had occurred. That would never happen in my state (California).
     
  13. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    If your mom doesn't have guardianship over you, then she can't stop you.
     
  14. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Is that uncommon? Why not in California?
     
  15. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    I'm sure you've read about or seen the stories about Britney Spears.

    She's been under daddy's thumb and control for decades.

    Britney Spears Conservatorship Row Explained - Free Britney


    Britney Spears's father Jamie asks court to end singer's conservatorship


    Britney Spears says she agrees with father that conservatorship should end


    Britney Spears' Dad Jamie Spears to Step Down as Conservator - Variety
     
  16. adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

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    Look here, Casey. Even if she does have legal guardianship over you, there is nothing stopping you from walking out the door except your perceived inability to do so.

    Suppose you do that and she calls the police. The police will insist on seeing her paperwork before returning you to her home. That's when you'll find out for sure. If she doesn't have the paperwork, the police aren't going to detain a 35 year old adult.

    You might want to check out a local legal aid office for some help. If you have some money and a phone, you can call a Uber or Lyft to come get you. Don't ask your mother for permission. Just walk out the door.
     
    zddoodah, retic and Disabled Vet like this.
  17. Zigner

    Zigner Well-Known Member

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    First, depending on the information, it might cross the line in to the unlawful practice of law. Second, the clerk's got tons of other stuff to do.

    I have, however, been in touch with various agencies in Montana over the past year and all I have to say is that they really do things different there. I imagine it's probably similar in Georgia. California is huge, so we tend not to get such personalized service as that.
     
  18. retic

    retic Member

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    Are you still receiving SSDI? If so, is your mother your representative payee? If so you can ask the social security office to have that changed, and ask your new rep payee to help you get set up with living away from your parents. Social Security - Representative Payee Program
     
  19. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    FYI I’m 35 years old. Is it true that if someone has been collecting social security disability, and they have more money in a bank account, can the government take all that money away? My mom thinks my money needs to be taken out later today and into the safe in my parents room, so the government won’t take any of my money. Is my mom just being paranoid or is she just being careful?? I also heard that it’s illegal to put my money with hers, if (that’s a big if), she’s my guardian?
     
  20. Casey King

    Casey King Law Topic Starter New Member

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    Yes I am. Yes she is. How do I do that without my mom stopping me from doing that??
     
    Last edited: Oct 5, 2021

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