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is it possible under my circumstances to legally get away with moving out at 17? (very complicated)

Discussion in 'Other Family Law Matters' started by geminilazarus, Dec 27, 2016.

  1. geminilazarus

    geminilazarus Law Topic Starter Guest

    Jurisdiction:
    Missouri
    So, this is a sort of long story, but I'll try to make it brief while keeping in the necessary legal details.

    My mother was a widow, and I think for this reason we both received for many years social security money every month; a couple years ago she had hers taken due to illicit activities and my payments saw a minor increase. In early December 2013, she was arrested. She had sole custody of me. I don't know how this was achieved legally but I was permitted to call some family to come collect me and let me stay with them indefinitely, which I am very grateful they did.

    The family that I thereafter stayed with was my uncle, my mother's sister, and my aunt, his wife. I've been here since. Things are good, I do truly love them and appreciate all they've done for me, but I do believe that sometimes my aunt's treatment of me could fall under emotional abuse... And I'm almost at my limit with it.

    I have more than one place I could potentially go until the end of senior year in May. Multiple friends and their parents have shown support, should I need a place to stay. The only legal issue is my bank accounts, which have both our names on them, and my anxiety over what the police may choose to do with me should they decide to call, which is a very real possibility.

    However; I think there's not much they could do. My mother never gave them legal custody, even though she's been in and out of jail, and I haven't had consistent contact with her, she still has it. They don't even have power of attorney.

    If the situation were explained to law enforcement, and they determined me to be safer mentally and physically in a friend's home, would they allow me to stay there? (and no, none of these friends are boyfriends/girlfriends.) I turn 18 in June.

    Much thanks.
     
  2. army judge

    army judge Super Moderator

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    Don't burn bridges that you may one day need to cross back over, unless you have a boat, are a good swimmer, another bridge exists, or you never will return to the Land of Auntie Em.

    In your state, the police very often won't go after 17 year olds, especially ones approaching the magic age of 18.

    I can bore you, me, and others with the whys, but the police can also choose to snatch you up.

    In your predicament, absent a court order granting some adult custody, you could end up in foster care, or a state run group home.

    You hold the dice, mate, toss them or place them back on the shelf.

    Life offers us no guarantees, just risks.

    You pays your money, you takes your chance.

    If I had a vote, I'd say tough it out until you become an adult, thank the people who cared for you when no others did, and head out into the world.

    Know this, mate, offers of assistance get withdrawn as quickly as they appeared.

    Remember that bridge you;d have to burn to do what you're contemplating?

    Will you be allowed to cross back over, if your offer to stay with one of those nice folks is rescinded?

    These kinds of dilemmas, mate, are the things they don't tell kids eager to become adults.

    I've been an adult for almost 80% of my life, and I can say without equivocation, adulthood sucks.

    That freedom you believe exists, it doesn't.
    Those who wield that power you believe your parents hold, after you become an adult, are far more dictatorial than the worst parent could ever be.

    Good luck, laddie.
     
  3. adjusterjack

    adjusterjack Super Moderator

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    The bottom line, geminilazarus, is that you can leave any time you want and accept the consequences of your decision, which may be many or none.

    Life is a crap shoot. You roll the dice and hope they don't come up snake eyes.
     
  4. cbg

    cbg Super Moderator

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    There is no state where the legal age to move out without permission of the parents/legal guardians is younger than 18.

    There are a couple of states, and yours is one of them, where anomalies in the law mean that law enforcement is sometimes reluctant to return home a 17 year old who is in a safe place and whose parents/legal guardians know where they are. Please take careful note of the fact that "sometimes reluctant" does not mean "legally cannot". If your parents/legal guardians want you home badly enough, make no mistake, you WILL be going home. The police do not get to override your parents in the matter of where you are living; it's the other way around.
     
  5. Betty3

    Betty3 Super Moderator

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    Since you are going to turn 18 in June (only 6 mos. away), why don't you stick it out until then.
     

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