I had filed for a modification in visitation, upon doing that, my ex filed for child support to go through the courts. Currently, I pay child support by covering clothes, shoes, school supplies, etc. We carry full health and life insurance, we paid for her recent glasses, etc., etc. Went to court ordered mediation last week w/ a ton of paper work, ready for them to impute income ( I haven't worked since 2006, stay at home mom of 3), ready to pay child support via the court system. Knowing about the changes in family law as of Oct. 1, I asked for a joint custody, had a parent plan, color coded schedule for the next 15 months, it would have been a 30/70 w/ me having 30%.
I represented myself, my ex had an atty. and his atty. picked the mediator. My ex even paid for my mediation cost, (I wanted it to go through family court services due to cost). Mediator sat with me first, was concerned that I did not receive any copies of any paperwork, including ex's financial affidavit, that the ex's atty. furnished the courts throughout process, except for his initial answer to my petition to modify.
My ex did a 180 and asked for no child support, for me to continue to contribute the way I have, he wanted to keep the visitation we verbally agreed upon while waiting for court mediation. It caught me off guard. The mediator did not ask nor did he seem concerned to see previous years w-2's, medical records proving the autoimmune problems of 2 of my children, as to one of the reasons why I'm a stay at home mom. It was very cut and dry as if there was already a plan in motion before I got there.
My concern is, that if the judge denies the mediated proposal, how will this be done? Will we have to go back to mediation, will he just make the changes and so ordered?? The meeting went too rapid and the ex was too agreeable which makes me suspicious. I think I was played and I think I was conned out of my joint custody; based on the new laws in Fla. it was reasonable. The mediator could tell I had done my homework on the new law. I think all parties (except for me), are confident that the judge will leave visitation as is in mediated proposal but impose child support via the courts on me, therefore allowing the ex to get what he originally wanted.
I have no issues paying through the courts, but do have issues with not getting more visitation based on my being a stay at home mom and more available for my child, my first right to refuse, not having my situation with 2 young ones w/ medical problems considered and the fact that once again...(happened in 2001), the ex refused to divulge his income.
What options do I have if any? I know I entered mediation at my own risk w/out an atty. but I feel as if the mediator was not so impartial...with all do respect.
I represented myself, my ex had an atty. and his atty. picked the mediator. My ex even paid for my mediation cost, (I wanted it to go through family court services due to cost). Mediator sat with me first, was concerned that I did not receive any copies of any paperwork, including ex's financial affidavit, that the ex's atty. furnished the courts throughout process, except for his initial answer to my petition to modify.
My ex did a 180 and asked for no child support, for me to continue to contribute the way I have, he wanted to keep the visitation we verbally agreed upon while waiting for court mediation. It caught me off guard. The mediator did not ask nor did he seem concerned to see previous years w-2's, medical records proving the autoimmune problems of 2 of my children, as to one of the reasons why I'm a stay at home mom. It was very cut and dry as if there was already a plan in motion before I got there.
My concern is, that if the judge denies the mediated proposal, how will this be done? Will we have to go back to mediation, will he just make the changes and so ordered?? The meeting went too rapid and the ex was too agreeable which makes me suspicious. I think I was played and I think I was conned out of my joint custody; based on the new laws in Fla. it was reasonable. The mediator could tell I had done my homework on the new law. I think all parties (except for me), are confident that the judge will leave visitation as is in mediated proposal but impose child support via the courts on me, therefore allowing the ex to get what he originally wanted.
I have no issues paying through the courts, but do have issues with not getting more visitation based on my being a stay at home mom and more available for my child, my first right to refuse, not having my situation with 2 young ones w/ medical problems considered and the fact that once again...(happened in 2001), the ex refused to divulge his income.
What options do I have if any? I know I entered mediation at my own risk w/out an atty. but I feel as if the mediator was not so impartial...with all do respect.
